Francine longs for a true family vacation after she discovers Stan has been implanting them with false memories of great vacations for years thanks to goo tanks from the CIA.
When Stan takes the family on a cruise Francine still doesn't believe it's real so she jumps overboard. After the Smiths along with cruise employee, Becky, rescue Francine they become marooned on seemingly deserted island.
After Stan punches a male meter maid during a disagreement over a parking ticket, a judge sentences him to two weeks of community service, as a meter maid. However Stan & Francine find the lifestyle too seductive.
Meanwhile, Hayley poses in the nude for an art class, where one of the artists turns out to be Roger and in turns creates a portrait of Hayley that Steve enjoys.
Songs: Antonio Vivaldi -- "Spring"
Stan finds the perfect guy to be friends with except for one small detail. Brett is an atheist, so Stan tries anything he can to get Brett to convert.
Meanwhile, to prank Steve, Roger makes him believe he has been accepted in Hogwarts Wizard's School which in reality is a crack house.
After the lastest visit by Francine's adoptive parents, he decided he must find her real parents.
Stan finally must deal with the fact that as a little girl, Hayley was brainwashed and trained as a secret CIA sleeper agent. He activates her to keep her from boarding a plane to France but unless he disables her within a couple of days, she will try (and most likely succeed) to kill him.
Meanwhile, after being inspired by 70s detective shows, Roger and Steve create detective personas, Wheels & the Legman.
Stan reluctantly reveals he has never actually killed anyone since he started working at the CIA, so his poker friends, along with Roger, help him make his first kill.
Stan puts his foot down on Greg and Terry having a baby, but despite that unknown to Stan, Francine agrees to be Greg & Terry's surrogate.
Meanwhile, after Steve and Roger send Klaus and fishbowl down a water slide, Klaus vows revenge.
With Stan's dissatisfaction of the family's Christmas decoration, he takes them out in the dead of winter to find a more adequate Christmas tree.
Leaving the family in the car Stan heads out alone only to be crushed by the perfect tree. Having a near death experience he spends time in limbo in court so they can decide if he should get a second chance at life.
With no luck in court, he kidnaps his lawyer and heads to God's house to confront the only person who can save himself & his family.
Stan finally convinces Francine to stop enabling and protecting Roger when he acts like a brat.
Roger makes an attempt to change his ways, even if it kills him.
Meanwhile, Klaus and Hayley play a game of truth or dare while and Steve decides he wants to become a backup dancer.
Songs: Little River Band -- “Cool Change”
In this James Bond parody, Agent Stan Smith must determine why Hollywood's biggest stars are intentionally making horrible movies with the worst director around, Tchochkie Schmear (Klaus).
The search leads him to Tearjerker (Roger) and with the help of Sexpun T'Come (Francine), they will thwart his diabolical plans to bring the world to tears.
Songs: Night Ranger -- Rock In America (You Can Still)
After her latest break up, Stan's mother come to cry on his shoulder. Francine & Roger attempt to break Stan's unnatural connection he has with his mother while trying to determine why Stan's mother never makes it past the third date.
Meanwhile, after holding Klaus Steve comes down with a case of Ick.
When Stan shares too much with Francine, she can't handle it, especially when the truth comes out about what happened to the husband of her friend Julie.
Meanwhile, Steve has a hard time recovering after Hayley kills the queen bee he used for his science project.
Former KGB agent, Sergei Kruglov, moves in next door to The Smiths in an attempt to make peace with Stan. However, once Sergei volunteers to help Steve with his model rocket, his true motives are revealed.
Meanwhile, Roger & Klaus travel around Europe.
After Stan finds out Roger has been selling photos of himself to the local paper, the CIA doubles their efforts in tracking him down. They ultimately hire Roger himself when it was discovered he was the one who took the photos.
Meanwhile, Hayley & Steve help Francine come to terms with being left-handed.
After a near death experience, Stan once again decided to search for Ollie North's gold which he believes is buried near their house.
Meanwhile, after reading about a sexual harassment settlement in the paper Roger bets Klaus he get a higher amount so he goes to work only to discover no one wants to.
Feeling unappreciated by Francine, Stan befriends a girl at the Spring Break Roger throws at the Smith home.
Meanwhile, Steve tries to lose his virginity to Carmen Selectra.