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Bioshuffle - Recap

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Ted boasts of how Veridian Dynamics employees work so smoothly together. He stops by to check on Phil and Lem, who are testing their hypersonic sound transmitter, which sends a narrow sound message On the highest setting it can cause vomiting. Lem tests it on Rick, pretending to be God and telling him to stop making so many copies.

Linda is in her cubicle and notices a liquid dripping from the ceiling. It burns into her desk and sets paper on fire. Veronica calls in a decontamination team which seals off the entire office. It turns out Dr. Bhamba’s new biocomputer, Johnny, is leaking after three years of perfect operation.

The company reassigns working space. Dr. Bhamba ends up in the Ridiculously Tiny Office Space. Veronica tells the other employees she doesn’t want to see them. Linda tells Ted and Phil she has to share an office in the basement with Wallace the food-taster. She hints that she’d like to share an office with Ted, but Ted refuses to take the hint. He warns Phil that he’s attracted to Linda but it’s not a good idea. Wallace offers Linda experimental food snacks and she quickly goes to Ted’s office to make it very clear she wants to move in with him. Ted agrees and hopes they can both keep things professional. Unfortunately, he finds Linda too attractive to maintain his concentration.

All the scientists from Dr. Bhamba’s floor are assigned to Phil and Lem’s lab, including the attractive Lucy. With some prodding from Phil, Lem approaches Lucy and they get on halfway well. Unfortunately, Ted continues to stare at Linda even when she catches him. He also finds her work habits, like training her goldfish to say “Mama,” very distracting. Ted suggests she gets back to work and produce the report they need. She taunts Ted over his mother issue and starts singing, further annoying Ted.

Lem and Lucy have an almost successful date and talk about how it almost ended well. Unfortunately, Lem was allergic to her perfume, sneezed, bounced her head into the door and bounced back into his head, knocking him out. They’re interrupted when another newly reassigned work, Brody, comes in. He calls Lucy exotic, angering her. Lem comes to her defense.

Ted is busy taking antacid when Veronica comes in to complain that she’s getting blamed for the leak. She starts taking antacid too and claims she’s not jealous of Ted and Linda being together. Linda is quiet for almost ten minutes, but then decides to start discussing Ted’s ex-wife. Ted would rather not and goes to Veronica’s office to ask to move in with her. She agrees but soon becomes just as distracting as Linda, cutting Ted’s hair and practicing karate to relieve her stress. Things come to a head when she comes back from a meeting and fires a silenced gun into a chair to relieve her stress. Ted checks to see if Phil has a solution to the biocomputer leak, and admits that he doesn’t want to discuss it because it’ll just lead to a fight. Linda arrives and insists they should talk about it but Ted runs off again.

While Phil comes up with a polymer to plug the leak, Lucy and Brody chat and Lem gets worried. He decides to use the sonic transmitter at full strength to make Brody vomit. Unfortunately, he misses and hits Lucy. Brody comes to her aid and Ted tells them it’s time to deal with the biocomputer. Ted prepares to shoot it with polymer but Phil warns there’s a 20% chance it could blow up the biocomputer. Ted thinks those are good odds considering the alternative. However, Phil realizes what the problem is: the biocomputer is stressed from three years of being unable to vent its frustrations. Instead of crashing, it secreted acid from its ulcer. Phil writes a program to relieve the acid buildup.

Ted realizes he gets stressed out when he can’t communicate. He goes to talk to Linda but she’s busy working. She gives in and Ted tells her how bad her work habits are and how they bug him. Linda says the real problem is that he’s afraid of being close to Linda because he’s afraid that she’ll leave him like his ex-wife did. All he does is flirt. However, Ted notes that she flirts back and she has a boyfriend. However, she points out six weeks ago she didn’t and he still rejected her. They agree to be professional and Linda angrily leaves for her own cubicle.

Lem goes to see Lucy and return her dry cleaned clothing, only to discover she’s bonded with Brody after he helped her with her vomiting. Lem makes sure to get the $12 for the dry cleaning bill.

Everyone gets their offices back. Lem can only sigh as Lucy leaves. Dr. Bhamba sings. Veronica gives Phil a promotion for his efforts only to realize he was promoted a year ago. She figures he owes the company money for the last year of extra pay and offers to look into it for him.

Linda gives her report to Ted and insists that she’s professional no matter what her work process is. She also puts a banner on her butt warning him that if he’s looking, he’s not being professional.

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Warning: Better Off Ted season 1 episode 9 guide may contain spoilers
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