<-- Previous EpisodeNext Episode -->

Better Off Ted: It's Nothing Business, It's Just Personal

Ted reluctantly gets involved when Veronica loses sleep because of her boyfriend Mordor's energetic sex drive. Meanwhile, Lem gets a unique red lab coat and he and Phil try to puzzle out what it means... unaware that it means nothing.

Episode Info  

Episode number: 2x4
Production Number: 2APX02
Airdate: Tuesday December 29th, 2009

Director: Marc Buckland
Writer: Victor Fresco

Alternate Airdates:

United Kingdom Sep 21, 2010

Guest Stars
Mark DeklinMark Deklin
As Mordor
Mark DeklinMark Deklin
As Mordor

Co-Guest Stars
Carla JimenezCarla Jimenez
As Patricia
Carla JimenezCarla Jimenez
As Patricia
Gary RubensteinGary Rubenstein
As Dr. Rosenbaum
Bill StevensonBill Stevenson
As Lonny
Bill StevensonBill Stevenson
As Lonny
Main Cast
Jay HarringtonJay Harrington
As Ted Crisp
Portia de RossiPortia de Rossi
As Veronica Palmer
Portia de RossiPortia de Rossi
As Veronica Palmer
Andrea AndersAndrea Anders
As Linda Zwordling
Jonathan SlavinJonathan Slavin
As Phil Mymen
Jonathan SlavinJonathan Slavin
As Phil Mymen
Malcolm BarrettMalcolm Barrett
As Lem Hewitt
Malcolm BarrettMalcolm Barrett
As Lem Hewitt


Ted feels that employees should keep their personal and work lives separate. He's the only one: Linda asks him if he had sex on his most recent date, and when he refuses to discuss it, she figures he didn't. Meanwhile, Lem has received a red lab coat to wear in the lab. He's the only one who has received a red lab coat, and he and Phil wonder what it means...

Read the full recap
Episode Quotes
Ted: It turns out developing cheese that never spoils is harder than we thought. Right now, it's more of a cheddar-colored fabric that does spoil.

Veronica: This weekend, Mordor and I am going scuba diving. Last weekend we raced cars in the desert and ate a rattlesnake... and a goat that wandered into our camp, and then a light salad.

Veronica: I know I've been distracted lately, but I'll be fine. I'm just living an exciting and full life--burning the candle at both ends. The way my great-grandfather, a misunderstood candlemaker, insisted candles should be burned.

Linda: Whenever I have sex, I have to be alert the next day so I don't make mistakes. I have to be alert during sex so I don't make mistakes. Basically, I always have to be alert.
Ted: Is it possible to make mistakes during a sex, for a woman to make mistakes during sex?

Linda: God, you'd be hard to go out with.
Ted: Hey, I am fantastic to go out with. I'm... I'm thoughtful as a man can be, while still pillaging like a Viking in the bedroom. But I am not getting involved in Veronica's personal life.
Linda: So my boss gets to have all the sex-fun of a relationship, while all the stress of being exhausted trickles down to me? Man, capitalism blows.

Phil: Wow. Can you imagine how great it would be to just take Veronica out in the middle of the day and have lunch with her?
Lem: You should try to aim higher for your fantasies.

Ted: This... this is about Veronica. See, she has a very high-pressure job. And she does it with 100% focus.
Mordor: Oh, she's the same in bed. Or when dismembering a goat.
Ted: Right. So you and the other animals have seen it.

Linda: What did you say to Mordor?
Ted: I did not tell him to have sex with Veronica while she's sleeping. Why? What did he do?
Linda: I walked into the supply closet, and he was in there with Ashley from Accounting. And they were not looking for supplies. Unless she uses her ya-ha to store office supplies and he uses his yang-doodle to look for things. That's what my mom calls it.

Linda: Oh, don't be that guy who points fingers. No one likes a pointer. Even in the dog world, they're seen as insufferable.

Veronica: God, you people are paranoid. No wonder the company has to secretly manipulate you.

Veronica: Of course it was an accident. Although, the man was cheating on me, and my subconscious is very protective, and sometimes kind of a douche.

Veronica: My God, Ted, you don't tell a man like Mordor to be less passionate. It's like telling Gandhi to be less... whatever he was. Thin.

Other Episode Crew

CreatorVictor Fresco
Executive ProducerVictor Fresco
Co-Executive ProducerTim Doyle  |  Michael Teverbaugh  |  Michael A. Ross  |  Kat Likkel  |  John Hoberg  |  Michael Shipley
Associate ProducerLisa Iannone
Production DesignerDawn Snyder
EditorLance Luckey
CastingLaura Adler  |  Jill Anthony
Unit Production ManagerJack Philbrick
First Assistant DirectorLeo Bauer
Staff WriterIngrid Escajeda
MusicChristopher A. Lee  |  Scott Clausen
Costume DesignerBrandy Lusvardi
Key GripTom Keefer
Set DecoratorDiane Yates
Transportation CoordinatorMike Paventi
Property MasterKevin Shaw (3)
Construction CoordinatorGreg Hamlin
Production Sound MixerJaya Jayaraja
Script SupervisorRebecca E. Asher
Production CoordinatorJohn Barney
Script CoordinatorEve Weston
Assistant EditorJoan Wrzala
Post Production SupervisorJohn M. Myrick
Supervising Sound EditorRandy Thomas
Director of PhotographyBrian J. Reynolds
Story EditorElijah Aron  |  Audra Sielaff  |  Jordan Young
Costume SupervisorPatricia McLaughlin
Production AccountantSuzie Shimizu
Chief Lighting TechnicianDerrick Kolus
Department Head HairLorna A. Reid
Department Head Make-upDarla Albright
Music ConsultantKevin Edelman
Original CastingSharon Klein  |  Geraldine Leder
Production StaffChristopher Horan  |  Shel Gilbert  |  Robert Olmedo  |  Kate A. Ross  |  Oscar Sosa  |  Rob Hoffman  |  James Gordon  |  Rick Glassman  |  Patrick Dunn  |  Nickole Doro  |  Katie Botkin  |  Weston Middleton
Writing AssistantDevin Mahoney
Sword MasterTim Weske
Missing Information
Click here to add Episode Notes
Click here to add Music
Click here to add Episode Goofs
Click here to add Cultural References
Click here to add Episode References
Click here to add Analysis