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Better Off Ted: Change We Can't Believe In
| 8.8/10 (16 Votes cast) |
Episode Info
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Episode number: 2x7 Production Number: 2APX07 Airdate: Tuesday January 05th, 2010 Alternate Airdates:
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UK (
Co-Guest Stars
Main Cast
Recap
Phil and Lem are blowing up bacteria ion the lab when Ted comes in via the back stairs. After checking to make sure the back stairs spiders haven't poisoned him, he explains that came in the back away to avoid Ryan, an overly chatty security guard. Sitting at his desk, he has a lot of time to think about stupid things. Ted doesn't want to insult the guy and isn't sure what to do. Phil and Lem refuse to go past the spiders, so they have to go out the front past Ryan. First Ted and then Phil and Lem get sucked in...Read the full recap
Music
| Artist | Song Title | Played When |
| Sonny & Cher | I Got You Babe | End scene (sung by Harrington & de Rossi) |
Episode Quotes
Phil: Okay, the bacteria are going for the bait. Insert the nano-grenade.
Lem: Did it explode?
Phil: Oh, my God. There's flagella everywhere. What have we done?
Lem: Did it explode?
Phil: Oh, my God. There's flagella everywhere. What have we done?
Ted: Every time I walk by the guy, he sucks me into a 15-minute conversation. You do that eight times a day, that adds up to... well, time I could be working on my math skills.
Ted: I don't want to insult the guy. If only there were a nice way to say, "You're killing me, you energy-sucking time gobbler."
Veronica: The company finally realized the P.A. system in this building needs to be fixed. It makes everything sound like that janitor that got trapped inside the wall. "Let me out. I'm not a ghost!" We do have a lot of fun here.
Phil: I suppose we could use the 20 terahertz oscillator.
Lem: But doesn't that burn through flesh?
Phil: Not always.
Lem: How about we use the 10 terahertz oscillator?
Phil: Ten? Yeah, why don't we just hop on a winged unicorn and fly off to magic land?
Lem: But doesn't that burn through flesh?
Phil: Not always.
Lem: How about we use the 10 terahertz oscillator?
Phil: Ten? Yeah, why don't we just hop on a winged unicorn and fly off to magic land?
Veronica: Sorry. From now on when you present ideas to me, only one of you is allowed to talk.
Lem: But that's not how we work.
Veronica: Exactly. That's now how we work.
Lem: Not.
Veronica: Now.
Lem: Not.
Veronica: Now. Now, now, now, now, now, now, now.
Lem: Not?
Veronica: Now, now, now , now, now, now, now.
Phil: We should go.
Lem: But that's not how we work.
Veronica: Exactly. That's now how we work.
Lem: Not.
Veronica: Now.
Lem: Not.
Veronica: Now. Now, now, now, now, now, now, now.
Lem: Not?
Veronica: Now, now, now , now, now, now, now.
Phil: We should go.
Commercial: Veridian Dynamics. Friendship. It's so important. But it's different at work. Time spent with friends at work robs your employer of opportunity. And robbing people is wrong. Veridian Dynamics. Friendship. It's the same as stealing.
Ryan: You think I talk too much?
Ted: Well, I don't know about generally, but to me, oh, my God, yes.
Ted: Well, I don't know about generally, but to me, oh, my God, yes.
Linda: So did you hear the latest office gossip? Ryan the security guard quit his job because you're a giant douche-mobile. That's right, you're a douche on wheels. Or perhaps a decorative sculpture hanging above a baby douche's crib. The gossip didn't specify.
Lem: So it's your turn in the saddle, cowboy. get on that horse and... I don't know any more cowboy things. Wait. Beans.
Lem: Together we're a thing of beauty, like a swan.
Phil: But on my own, I'll be like half a swan. All I'll do is make a big mess and die.
Phil: But on my own, I'll be like half a swan. All I'll do is make a big mess and die.
Phil: You know what might brighten your day? A peek at the smallest squirrel science can make.
Lem: But we're going to have to ask you to wear a face mask. He's crazy easy to inhale.
Lem: But we're going to have to ask you to wear a face mask. He's crazy easy to inhale.
Veronica: Here, you do it.
Phil: Me?
Veronica: No, the microphone-attaching elf who lives in my drawer.
Phil: Talking about drawer elves isn't going to make this any less scary.
Phil: Me?
Veronica: No, the microphone-attaching elf who lives in my drawer.
Phil: Talking about drawer elves isn't going to make this any less scary.
Veronica: Maybe my kindergarten teacher was right. Maybe I am too controlling.
Other Episode Crew
| • Creator | Victor Fresco |
| • Executive Producer | Victor Fresco |
| • Co-Executive Producer | John Hoberg | Kat Likkel | Tim Doyle | Michael A. Ross | Michael Shipley | Michael Teverbaugh |
| • Producer | Marc Solakian |
| • Associate Producer | Lisa Iannone |
| • Production Designer | Dawn Snyder |
| • Editor | Robert Bramwell |
| • Casting | Jill Anthony | Laura Adler |
| • Unit Production Manager | Jack Philbrick |
| • First Assistant Director | Eric Jewett |
| • Second Assistant Director | Jason Roberts (2) |
| • Staff Writer | Ingrid Escajeda |
| • Music | Christopher A. Lee (1) | Scott Clausen |
| • Costume Designer | Brandy Lusvardi |
| • Key Grip | Tom Keefer |
| • Set Decorator | Andi Brittan |
| • Transportation Coordinator | Mike Paventi |
| • Property Master | Kevin Shaw (3) |
| • Construction Coordinator | Greg Hamlin |
| • Production Sound Mixer | Jaya Jayaraja |
| • Script Supervisor | Rebecca E. Asher |
| • Production Coordinator | John Barney |
| • Script Coordinator | Eve Weston |
| • Assistant Editor | Brad Hawkinson |
| • Post Production Supervisor | John M. Myrick |
| • Supervising Sound Editor | Randy Thomas |
| • Re-Recording Mixer | Tamara Johnson |
| • Director of Photography | Brian J. Reynolds |
| • Story Editor | Audra Sielaff | Jordan Young | Elijah Aron | Becky Mann |
| • Costume Supervisor | Patricia McLaughlin |
| • Production Accountant | Suzie Shimizu |
| • Chief Lighting Technician | Derrick Kolus |
| • Department Head Hair | Lorna A. Reid |
| • Department Head Make-up | Darla Albright |
| • Music Consultant | Kevin Edelman |
| • Original Casting | Sharon Klein | Geraldine Leder |
| • Assistant To The Executive Producer | Chris Luccy |
| • Production Staff | Oscar Sosa | Jason Suhrke | Kate A. Ross | Jessica Poter | Robert Olmedo | Shel Gilbert | Christopher Horan | Rob Hoffman | James Gordon | Rick Glassman | Patrick Dunn | Nickole Doro |
| • Writing Assistant | Devin Mahoney |
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