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Boston Legal
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| Title: | Stick It |
| Episode Number: | 36 |
| Season: | 2 |
| Season Episode #.: | 19 |
| Production Number: | 2F16 |
| Original Airdate: | Tuesday March 14th, 2006 |
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When Alan Shore’s secretary, Melissa, is arrested for tax evasion, he takes on the case of this outspoken girl who says her late, patriotic grandfather would be proud of her for challenging the government.
Meanwhile, after a blind date with Shirley Schmidt’s nephew goes badly, Denise Bauer hopes her love life will improve when she meets a cute policeman.
And Paul Lewiston decides to stage an intervention for his crystal-meth-using daughter, insisting that a reluctant Brad Chase help him.
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| Denise: I dreamt I had a three-way with Denny… and Denny.
Shirley: Uh, good lord, I wouldn’t want to dream that you just told me that.
| Denny: You dreamt we had sex together.
Denise: How did you know?
Denny: You mean I’m right? I ask everybody that. You’re the first person who ever said yes.
| Alan: I’m not sure I can get you out of this.
Melissa Hughes: Can’t you just make one of those really, really long speeches like you did with my credit card thingy?
| Judge Robert Sanders: What is this gibber-gabber? I don’t like gibber-gabber in my courtroom.
Allan: Oh my goodness.
| Denise: Hi, Michael. Well, it’s nice to meet you. Shirley told me so much about you.
Michael Riesz: Yeow.… Giggity-giggity.
| Melissa Hughes: You want to bone me up?
Alan: I beg your pardon?
Melissa Hughes: For my testimony, should you prep me?
| Shirley: You slept with him.
Denise: I did not.
Shirley: You did too.
Denise: I did not.
Shirley: Denise?
Denise: Maybe a little.
Shirley: You slut!
| Judge Robert Sanders: We will have closing arguments. Then, the jury will rule and, then, I will give my sentence.
Alan: A small point, Judge, you probably shouldn’t indicate to the jury you expect a sentence. I could be wrong.
| Denny: Do you have any idea what would happen if all the little people stopped paying their taxes?
Alan: The rich people would have to start paying theirs?
Denny: Exactly!
| Judge Robert Sanders: Mr. Foreman, the jury has reached a unanimous verdict?
Foreman: Yeah, Judge, guilty.
Judge Robert Sanders: Wait ‘til I ask you! Now, what say you.
Alan: The suspense is killing me.
| Denny: No, no, no, no…. Soul, that’s a religious thing. State, Church, it’s unconstitutional for the United States to have a soul.
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| Michael Riesz: Yeow.… Giggity-giggity.
Giggity-giggity is the catch phrase for the over-sexed character, Quagmire, on the Fox animated hit, Family Guy.
| Alan: Learned Hand once said…
Billings Learned Hand was a United States Judge and ardent champion of free speech.
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| Denny: Is she coming over again to guard you against night terrors?
This is a reference to the episode, “The Ass Fat Jungle”, where Alan paid Melissa to sleep at his home and protect him form sleepwalking during his night terrors.
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