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Dave Stars in His Own Video Game: Dave wonders what life would be like if he was in Grand Theft Auto.
Blackzilla: Dave plays Blackzilla, a huge black man the size of Godzilla who invades Tokyo.
Dave's Two Minute Special: Dave does a two minute special for HBO, but it ends before he can get to the stage.
The Player Haters Ball: The most ruthless player haters gather together to compete to be the biggest player hater.
Musical guest: The Roots
Ice T: The nominees are... Buck Nasty. Buck Nasty is nominated for getting his best friend's girlfriend pregnant, then tricking his best friend into raising the little motherf*cker. The next nominee is... Pit Bull. Pit Bull is nominated for calling the cops on his drug-dealing neighbors, not because it was the right thing to do, but just 'cause he was jealous of all the money they was makin'. And the final nominee is... Silky Johnston. Silky Johnston is nominated for calling in a bomb threat at the Special Olympics!
Silky Johnson: Of course the so-called Beautiful, why don't you click your heels together three times, and go back to Africa.
Silky Johnson: (Looking at a picture of the Ozzbournes) I like the girl's song "Papa Don't Preach". I got a new song for ya, bitch. It's called "Daughter Don't Sang".
Silky Johnson: That was Beautiful. On the weekends, Beautiful does stunts for Little Richard in gay movies.
Silky Johnson: Buck Nasty, what can I say about say about your suit that hasn't already been said about Afganistan - it looks bombed out and depleted.