Lester: Man up, Charles.
Chuck: Why would you do this to me?
Morgan: I'm sorry, man, it was a practice run for when we kidnap Awesome for his bachelor party.
Chuck: You guys aren't even invited.
Lester: There's no better way to be invited than kidnapping the guest of honor.
Jeff: A bachelor party is a mythical place where booze and women are free... it's Xanadu.

Morgan: Chuck, sorry buddy. We are here to plead our case about Awesome's bachelor party.
Chuck: You know what, not now, guys. I'm in the middle of something.
Lester: The world revolves around the sun, Charles, not you.
Jeff: Ooh, astronomy snap.
Morgan: Okay, it's just that...we like you to reconsider.
Chuck: Reconsider what, you guys aren't even invited.
Morgan: You tell him or I will.
Lester: Jeff and I... we've never been to a bachelor party.
Jeff: Never known anyone qualified enough to land a woman for life.

Mohammed Zamir: Are you his doctor?
Chuck: Of course! Am I not wearing a doctor's coat? Who else would I be if not for one of this man's doctors?
Mohammed Zamir: Doctor, I am Harry Lime's private physician, Dr. Mohammed Zamir.
Chuck: Ah, Doctor.
Mohammed Zamir: Doctor.
Chuck: Doctor.
Mohammed Zamir: Doctor.
Chuck: And Doctor.
Mohammed Zamir: Nurse, would you excuse us for a moment please? I'd like to consult the doctor privately please.
Chuck: Yes, yes, we will be discussing doctor things that only doctors understand, please go.Please don't go.
Agent Alex Forrest: Be right outside... Doctor.

Casey: Hey, the security system's has been updated. I'll either need 40 minutes to decrypt the code or four ounces of C4.
Alex: No, we should just take out some doctor and steal his card key.
Casey: I like the cut of your jib.
Chuck: Wow! You two are a match made in a very frightening part of Heaven.

(pretending to be a stripper)
Agent Alex Forrest: I understand one of you has been a naughty, naughty boy.
Lester: Me, oh my God, pick me, I'm so bad, I've been bad, I've been bad, I'm a bad person, I'm a terrible person. Ouch.
Jeff: I broke eight and a half commandments on the way to work this morning.