Pleasant Little Kingdom - Recap

Susan takes Paige to the park, while Lynette packs up clothes. Lisa
Ellison is pregnant, so Lynette is passing on all of Paige's onesies.
She gets all teary, but Tom reminds her she's the one who threw confetti
after the doctor tied her tubes. She sobs out loud as she realizes that
soon they will all be grown, and then it will just be her and Tom. Tom
is happy to hear it, and gives her a preview of what their retirement is
going to be like. Susan interrupts their lovemaking. Maybe they should
have locked the door.

Mary Alice talks about good neighbors, and great neighbors. Paul is
still busy buying all the houses on Wisteria Lane. He assures the
homeowner that the Lane is going to change, and he's better off going
now, with all his memories intact. Lee wants to know what will happen
next, and Paul says he's letting the neighborhood in on his plan. He
puts a sign up out front.

Lynette and Tom try to set Susan at ease. She hasn't looked them in the
eye since she walked in yesterday. Tom goes in the hall to get ready for
work, and Susan congratulates Lynette because Tom is very well-endowed.
She wants to know why Lynette never told her friends that she was
sleeping with Tommy Tripod. Tom is overhearing the entire conversation,
with a smile on his face. She tells Susan she doesn't care to advertise.
What does she care if people think he's got a dinky one. The smile falls
off.

Gabby finds Carmen poring over a map, charting her course for Texas.
Gabby is alarmed, she's not ready to lose her daughter, Grace. She wants
Grace to stay with her and Carlos until Carmen and Hector get settled.
That could take months, but she doesn't mind. She can stay in school,
and be safe, with family. Carmen says that Hector and herself are all
the family Grace needs. When she leaves, so does Grace. The two women
trade insults about who's a bad mom.

Karen tells her beau he should tell everyone he slipped and fell in the
shower. They are old, it's believable. He blames the Kama Sutra. It
should be called Kama Sutures. She sees the sign in Paul's yard. She
sends her beau home and gets everybody gathered to the sign. it's Second
Chances, for felons under house arrest. A halfway house on Wisteria
Lane. Paul fills the women in on his plan. He wants these men to have
the same chance he had, coming home to a loving neighborhood like this
one. They give him their feedback, but he tells them he has more faith
in them than they have in themselves.

Susan swings by Renee's and hears the "One less" song playing. Renee is
sobbing her heart out on the couch. Susan backs out, and knocks this
time. Renee answers the door, and Susan drops off a birthday card. It
was addressed to Renee, but dropped off at Lynette's. Renee tells her
she can throw it away. Susan refuses because it's obvious that someone
who loves Renee sent the card. She opens the card and finds it is from
Renee's dentist. And oh look, she is due for a cleaning. Susan asks
her if she has any special birthday plans. Renee retorts that she hasn't
celebrated her birthday since the 3rd time she turned 28. She starts to
shut the door, but Susan stops her. She tells Renee they should go out.
No candles, no cake, no singing; just enough booze to wash away the
pain. Renee wants to know why Susan assumes she's in pain. Susan lies
and says she was referring to her own pain. She's really missing Mike
since he's been in Alaska. Renee grudgingly accepts. She has a backup
dinner lined up, just in case this one is too depressing. She slams the
door in Susan's face, even as Susan is assuring her that she will have a
great time.

Gabby approaches Bob for some good, free legal advice. She refers to a
woman who is in this country illegally. Bob says "You mean Carmen", but
she's not the only illegal Gabby knows. Half of Carlos's family scaled
the fence to get here. She wants to know if Grace would be able to stay
here if somebody anonymously reported the mother to immigration. He
said sure as long as somebody was willing to burn in hell, because they
are a family, and this is the wrong thing to do. Gabby blows past all
that and asks again. If she of reports Carmen, will she get to keep
Grace. Bob says yes, it is legal. But just because it's legal, doesn't
make it right. Gabby goes inside in makes the call.

Tom and Lynette are getting ready for dinner. He wants to know why she
doesn't talk to people about his penis. Lynette says there's a reason
that they are called private parts. And why would he want to brag,
anyway? Tom says he knows how the chats with the girls go, and for once
he'd prefer she share this, rather than his screwups. He asks her to
tell her friends what he brings to the table. Lynette asks him to
please not put it on the table.

Keith is all dolled up for his date with Bree. He goes in his room to
get something, and his dad comes out of the other room. Bree wonders if
he's just rolling out of bed or going there now. He sees the Wheel of
Fortune is on, so apparently he's getting up. She asks how he's doing,
and he says not so hot. Mary's divorce lawyer called today. The
marriage has been dead for a very long time, but he still had no idea
what a kick in the gut this was going to be. It's just hitting him that
he could be alone for the rest of his life. Bree tells him not to be
ridiculous. He should take a look in the mirror (after he's showered).
He needs to stop wallowing in self pity. He liked the army. They always
told him what to do and when to do it. Bree assures him she can do that.
Turn off the TV, take a shower, get dressed and get out. He he doesn't
know what he would do after all that.

Keith checks his look in the mirror, then grabs the ring. He's ready to
propose. When he rejoins Bree, she informs him that she invited his
father to join them for dinner.

Bob checked the bylaws. Paul can't open the halfway house without the
approval of the homeowners association. But he's not stupid; he would
already know that he didn't have the necessary votes. Susan wishes Mike
was home so he could go over there and set Paul straight. Is there
another macho guy they could send over. Tom waits for his name to be
announced, but no joy. Tom is fuming, especially once Karen suggests
they send Lynette, because she's got a set. Lynette has finally had
enough. She says Tom can intimidate Paul in the men's room. Tom's
really packing heat. He can drive in the carpool lane when he's alone.
If this thing falls in the forest, it does make a sound. Etc. Then she
walks out. Karen notes that one would think Lynette would smile more.

ICE shows up, and Gabby sends Grace to the kitchen. Carmen runs in to
announce that immigration is there. She and Grace both panic. Grace
realizes these are the people who took Hector away, and she's petrified.
Carmen hugs Grace and tells her she loves her before sending her up to
Juanita's room. Carmen tells Gabby that these people are going to take
her away, and she needs her to look after Grace. Gabby resolutely
states that Carmen isn't going anywhere. Carmen answers the door as
though she is Gabby and Gabby pretends to be Carmen. She will leave
with the ICE men.

Bree and Keith are finally about to enjoy a dinner without Richard. He
goes to check on their table, while she orders his drink. He talks to
the hostess about surprising Bree with the ring. An old acquaintance
approaches Bree. Her name is Tracy Miller, and she's a stick. She
tells Bree she's lost a ton. Bree asks after her husband, Adam.
Apparently he is sitting in a studio apartment, cursing her divorce
lawyer for taking all his money. Keith joins Bree, and Tracy asks if
that's Andrew. He's all grown up! Bree corrects her. Keith is her boyfriend.

Gabrielle is bailed out by Carlos. She tells all the other illegal
immigrant she's sure she'll see them again, they seem like a very
persistent lot. Carlos asks her how she is and she says OK, as long as
he's not mad at her. He tells her it was a very brave thing she did for
Carmen. He put Carmen and Grace up in a hotel. She wants them to come
back, but they can't. Because of that stupid stunt she pulled, their
house is under surveillance. Carmen and Grace are leaving for Texas in
the morning.

Keith and Bree are enjoying their quiet dinner for two, until Richard
arrives. He ordered some takeout. He plays on Bree's sympathies, and she
invites him to join them. She also invites Tracy. She has pretty much no
class whatsoever, and everybody notices. She and Richard have nothing in
common. Bad idea to have her join them. Tracy thinks we should cut all
funding to the military, and pour the money into the schools. Richard
hopes they teach Arabic in those schools. Keith pulls Bree to the side.
He doesn't want to order with those two here. He wants them gone.
The waiter brings the appetizer, and Tracy bellows "Hey! Did anybody
order the shrimp cocktail with a side of really puny engagement ring?"
Bree tries to discuss it with Keith, but he tells her this is NOT how
her wedding proposal is going to be handled. He accuses Bree, Richard,
and Tracy of destroying their perfect evening.

Susan and Renee's dinner is not going much better. Susan tells Renee
she saw her crying. She assumed it was because it's Renee's birthday,
and she is alone. Renee is swift to correct her. She can't stop
thinking about this great guy from her past. The older she gets, the
more she thinks he must've been the one. Susan tells her not to give
up. She never knows how things are going to work out. Renee tells Susan
she's not the fun one. She's the smart one.

Lynette and Tom are angrily brushing their teeth. He finally calls her
on what she said at the homeowners association meeting. She doesn't know
why he's so upset. None of her friends think he's a buffoon. They all
wish their husband had one or more of Tom's personality traits. He asks
why that annoys her, and she asks him how many people go up to him and
tell him he has the perfect wife? Exactly. All she's heard for almost 20
years is how lucky she is to have a guy like Tom. So if she doesn't
brag about how great Tom is, it's only because she doesn't want to be
reminded of how much she doesn't deserve him. She flounces into bed, and
Tom tells her he knows how lucky he is to be married to her. She is
still sexy as all get out. She makes him laugh. And even after raising
five children, she still cries when she has to pack up the last onesie.
They make after fight love.

Renee tells Susan that now she knows how to get out of paying for a
taxi. Susan says that wasn't a taxi, that was her car. But at least now
she knows why Renee showed her her boobs. Susan puts Renee to bed on the
couch. She's mumbling about the guy she's in love with being Tom. The
love of her life.

Bree arrives to talk to Keith, but he's out for a walk. Richard
apologizes for ruining her evening. He asks what she would have said if
Keith had pulled off the proposal. Bree doesn't know, as the proposal
was rather sudden. Richard says Keith has always been far too
spontaneous but Bree counters that that's exactly what drew her to him.
Richard wants to be honest. He sees Bree with someone steady, more
reliable; somebody who shares her faith, and old-fashioned values.
Someone more her own age. She says that she loves Keith. He agrees.
Keith is a great kid. Bree leaves, asking Richard to tell Keith that she
stopped by.

Gabby is getting Grace ready to leave. She takes a moment to memorize
her face. Texas is so far away. Her last words to Grace are to follow
her dreams. Don't let anybody stop her from going after anything she
wants. Carlos comes to end the goodbyes, and Grace gets in the truck.
Carmen apologizes about what she said about Juanita the other day. As
she leaves, Gabby thanks her for taking care of Grace, and Carmen says
the same. They hug. Grace gives Gabby a smile and a wave as she goes,
and Gabby completely falls apart as the truck pulls away.

The halfway house issue is addressed at the meeting. and Paul makes it
clear that he owns seven houses on the lane. He used his settlement
funds to acquire the extra properties. He only needs one more person to
sell, and he has the majority vote. The group starts to fall apart, just
as Paul intended.

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