Dexter: (voiceover) Tonight's the night, and it's going to happen again, and again; has to happen. Nice night. Miami is a great town. I love the Cuban food. Pork sandwiches... my favorite. But I'm hungry for something different now.
Dexter: Open your eyes and look at what you did! Look, or I'll cut your eyelids right off your face.
Mike Donovan: Hail Mary, full of grace, the lord..
Dexter: (slapping him) Stop, that never helped anybody.
Mike Donovan: I couldn't help myself. I couldn't. Please, you have to understand
Dexter: Trust me, I definitely understand. See, I can't help myself either. But children, I could never do that. Not like you. Never, ever kids.
Mike Donovan: Why?
Dexter: I have standards.
Dexter: (voiceover) My name is Dexter, Dexter Morgan. I don't know what made me the way I am, but whatever it was left a hollow place inside. People fake a lot of human interactions, but I feel like I fake them all, and I fake them very well...and that's my burden, I guess.
Dexter: (voiceover) Harry and Dorris Morgan did a wonderful job raising me. But they're both dead now. I didn't kill them. Honest.
Harry: You're different, aren't you, Dexter?
Young Dexter: What do you mean, Pop?
Harry: The Billups say Buddy disappeared. I found the grave, son.
Young Dexter: That dog was a noisy little creep, dad. He was barking all night, and mom couldn't sleep. And she's very, very sick, and that lousy dog was yapping at every leaf that blew down the sidewalk!
Harry: There were a lot of bones in there, Dexter, and not just Buddy's.
Dexter: (voiceover) Blood. Sometimes it sets my teeth on edge, other times it helps me control the chaos. The Code of Harry, my foster father, is satisfied and so am I. Harry was a great cop here in Miami. He taught me how to think like one; he taught me how to cover my tracks. I’m a very neat monster.
Dexter: (voiceover) That's my foul-mouthed foster sister, Debra. She has a big heart but won't let anyone see it. She's the only person in the world who loves me. I think that's nice. I don't have feelings about anything, but if I could have feelings at all, I'd have them for Deb.
Dexter: (voiceover) There’s something strange and disarming about looking at a homicide scene in the daylight of Miami. It makes the most grotesque killings look staged, like you’re in a new and daring section of Disney World: Dahmerland!
Dexter: (voiceover) No blood... no sticky, hot, messy, awful blood, no blood at all! Why hadn't I thought of that? No blood. What a beautiful idea.
Detective Sue: See you at the next bloodbath?
Dexter: I never miss a party.
Dexter: (voiceover) Salt of the earth these people, and they work hard. But with a solve rate for murders at about 20%, Miami is a great place for me. Great place for me to hone my craft. Viva Miami.
Camilla: You have a morbid sense of fun.
Dexter: That's probably true.
Doakes: You give me the fucking creeps, you know that, Dexter?
Dexter: Yeah, I know. Sorry about that.
Doakes: Fuck you.
Dexter: Okay. Uhh... is there something I can...?
Doakes: Yeah, you can give me your fucking analysis on the blood splatter on these killings. You think I'm here to invite you to my nephew's bris?
Dexter: I didn't know you were Jewish.
Doakes: Shut the fuck up and write your report already.
Dexter: (voiceover) The only real question I have is why in a building full of cops, all supposedly with a keen insight to the human soul, is Doakes the only one who gets the creeps from me?
Dexter: (voiceover) The problem with eating and driving, which I love to do, is not being able to employ the 10-2 hand position on the wheel. It's a matter of public safety. But there's always a sacrifice.
Dexter: (voiceover) Animals don't like me, especially dogs. I don't think they approve of what I sometime do to their masters. That dog recognizes me, as easily as I can recognize Jaworski... or any other killer.
Harry: Have you ever wanted to kill anything else? You know, something bigger than a dog?
Young Dexter: Yes.
Harry: Like a person?
Young Dexter: Yeah, but no one in particular.
Harry: Why didn't you?
Young Dexter: I thought you and Mom wouldn't like it.
Dexter: (voiceover) But for me, sex never enters into it. I don't understand sex. Not that I have anything against women, and I certainly have an appropriate sensibility about men. But when it comes to the actual act of sex, it's always just seemed so undignified.
Dexter: (voiceover) Rita's ex-husband, the crack addict, repeatedly raped her, knocked her around. Ever since then, she's been completely uninterested in sex. That works for me.
Dexter: (voiceover) Needless to say, I have some unusual habits, yet all these socially acceptable people can't wait to pick up hammers and smash their food to bits. Normal people are so hostile.
Angel: Son of a whore.
Angel: Talking about this hijo de puta, this asshole killer, this maricón savage who makes us work on a Friday night.
Dexter: Only Mondays through Thursdays--that's what I always say.
Angel: Of course, cońo, be reasonable. Who wants to work on a Friday night? I have my needs.
Dexter: (voiceover) That's it. He's definitely the one. Now it's just a matter of time before he becomes a drop of blood in my glass slide collection.
Harry: It's okay, Dex. You can't help what happened to you. But you can make the best of it. Remember this forever: you are my son, you are not alone and you are loved.
LaGuerta: (to Debra) Ahh, Officer Morgan. I didn't recognize you with your clothes on.
Dexter: Talk to me about Jane Saunders.
Jaworski: Okay, I did her.
Jaworski: In a movie. A snuff film, but I'm not sorry.
Dexter: Of course not. And now I'm not sorry either.
LaGuerta: So then he must have already had the head with him in the front seat. Huh, that's weird. Why would he keep it there?
Dexter: I don't know. So he could use a carpool lane?
LaGuerta: Tell me, Dexter, how'd you get so smart? huh?
Dexter: Lots of sleep.
Dexter: (voiceover) I suppose I should be upset, even feel violated. But I'm not. No, in fact, I think this is a friendly message, kinda like 'Hey, wanna play?' And yes, I wanna play. I really, really do.