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Fastlane: Strap On

Deaq’s house is robbed and in the process his maid is shot during the heist. Van and Deaq find out the perpetrators are female and try to get in close to them. Unfortunately for them, this team of burglars are lesbians and their suave nature will have no affect on them. Billie decides that the only way to get close is for her to go undercover and try to catch them in the act herself.

Episode Info  

Episode number: 1x11
Production Number: FAS-113
Airdate: Friday January 17th, 2003

Director: Greg Yaitanes
Writer: Kim Newton

Guest Stars
Big BoyBig Boy
As Aquarius
Colleen PorchColleen Porch
As Jill Kistler
Danny Murphy (1)Danny Murphy (1)
As Carl Menzies
George HamiltonGeorge Hamilton
As Himself
Jaime PresslyJaime Pressly
As Sara Matthews
Julia VeraJulia Vera
As Inez
Katrina PhillipsKatrina Phillips
As Neve the Butch
Kelly McNairKelly McNair
As Abbey the Waitress
Randall ParkRandall Park
As Octopus Man
Robert MukesRobert Mukes
As Bouncer
Main Cast
Peter FacinelliPeter Facinelli
As Van Ray
Bill BellamyBill Bellamy
As Deaqon Hayes
Tiffani ThiessenTiffani Thiessen
As Wilhemina "Billie" Chambers
Episode Notes
Deaq's address is - 200 Country Club Drive - Santa Monica 90403

ArtistSong TitlePlayed When
AnastasiaNot That Kind 
The DonnasTake It Off 
Supreme Beings of LeisureGive Up 

Episode Quotes
Deaq: They think we're criminals.
Van: You don't know that, Okay. Maybe they think we work for the CIA. Chicks dig that. It's mysterious.
Deaq: They went to the restroom and didn't come back, Van. Ain't no mystery about that.

Deaq: Van thinks he can turn them.
Billie: Okay, I'll let you in on a little secret. You're the reason lesbians become lesbians.

Deaq: I'm still gonna kick your ass.
Van: You're never gonna see my ass. My ass is gonna be so far ahead of your ass. Take a good look at it 'cause it's the last time you'll see it.

Aquarius: Well, the International Bank of Aquarius does float that flow from time to time, ya, but not to friends, especially the civil servant kind. It's, it's,... it's just bad for business.

Sara Matthews: So, why is he being such an ass?
Billie: Your wife tells you she'd rather sleep with women then him. Kills a man's ego.

Carl Menzies: Whadda ya gonna do, pop a man in a wheelchair? Huh? Do you really want to be that guy?

(Puts a gun to Van's crotch.)
Sara Matthews: You can't be a gentleman, I'm gonna make you a lady.

(About Inez.)
Van: I sent her flowers.
Billie: You did?
Van: You didn't?
Billie: No.... Did you put my name on the card?

Cultural References
Van: I can see which Amazon's doin' you.

Amazons are a race of powerful women warriors in Greek mythology.

Deaq: First of all, that was my idea to swoop in Han Solo style.

Han Solo is the mercenary turned hero in the episodes 4-6 of the Star Wars saga. In episode 4, he swooped in and took out Darth Vader and his wing-men to clear the way for Luke Skywalker to fire his proton torpedoes and destroy the first Death Star.

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