Monica: Joey, what are you gonna do when you have a baby?
Joey: I'm gonna be in the waiting room, handing out cigars.
Chandler: Yes, Joey's made arrangements to have his baby in a movie from the 50's.
Monica: Let's get some coffee.
Chandler: Oh, ok, 'cause we never do that.
Chandler: When we're 40, if neither one of us are married, what do you say you and I get together and have one?
Monica: Why won't I be married when I'm 40?
Chandler: Oh, no, no. No. I just meant hypothetically.
Monica: Ok, hypothetically, why won't I be married when I'm 40?
Chandler: Rachel, what is the deal with you and doctors, anyway? Is, like, your father a doctor?
Rachel: Yeah, why?
Chandler: No reason…
Ross: Look, Carol never threw me out of a room before you came along.
Susan: Yeah? Well, there's a lot of things Carol never did before I came along.
Phoebe: (yelling) Don't make me do this again - I don't like my voice like this!!!
Joey: Oh, just had a baby.
Chandler: Mazel tov!
Rachel: (about the baby) Oh, god, I can't believe one of us actually has one of these.
Chandler: I know, I still am one of these.