Monica: I'm telling you, she went to the airport, and she's gonna go for it with Ross!
Phoebe: Oh my God. This is huge. This is bigger than huge. This is like, all right, what's bigger than huge?
Joey: Um, this?
Phoebe: Yes.

Monica: Guys, you got your hair cut.
Chandler: Yes, yes, we did. Thanks to Vidal Buffay.
Phoebe: 'Cause, you know, (in a deep voice) "if you don't look good, we don't look good." Oh, I love that voice!

Rachel: (out of breath) Airport, airport. Ross, not alone, Julie, arm around her. Cramp, cramp, cramp.
Chandler: Ok, I think she's trying to tell us something. Quick, get the verbs.
Rachel: I mean, isn't that just kick-you-in-the-crotch, spit-on-your-neck fantastic?

Julie: then we've gotta get some sleep.
Ross: Yeah, it's really 6:00 tomorrow night, our time.
Chandler: OK, well, listen, don't tell us what's gonna happen though, 'cause I like to be surprised.

Ross: Hey, Rach, can I get some coffee?
Rachel: Yeah, sure.
Ross: Thank you.
Chandler: Hey, Rach, can I get--
Rachel: Did you talk to him yet?
Chandler: No.
Rachel: Then, no.

Chandler: When last we left you, you were totally in love with, you know.
Ross: I know, I know I was, but there was always this little voice inside that kept saying, "It's never gonna happen. Move on." You know whose voice that was?
Chandler: God?
Ross: It was you, pal.
Chandler: Well, maybe it was God, doing me.

(Ross and the gang is watching Sumo wrestling on TV)
Ross: Ironically, these are the guys who were picked last in gym.

Monica: Pheebes, you know what I'm thinking?
Phoebe: Oh, ok. (thinks about it) How it's been so long since you've had sex, you're wondering if they've changed it?
Monica: No, although now that's what I'm thinking.

Monica: Well, I was thinking, that you gave the guys such great haircuts, I thought, maybe you'd like to do mine?
Phoebe: Ohh! No.
Monica: Why not?
Phoebe: Because, I'm just, I'm incredibly anal and an unbelievable control freak.
Monica: No you're not.
Phoebe: I know I'm not, but you are. I was trying to spare your feelings.

Chandler: Anybody know a good tailor?
Joey: Need some clothes altered?
Chandler: No, no, I'm just looking for a man to draw on me with chalk.

Joey: Why don't you go see Frankie? My family's been going to him forever. He did my first suit when I was 15. No wait, 16. No, 'scuse me, 15. (still confused) All right, when was 1990?
Chandler: Okay. You have to stop the Q-tip when there's resistance!!!

Joey: (to Rachel, about Paolo) And the fact that you dumped him because he hit on Phoebe?
Ross: Hey, Paulo. What are you doing here?
Paulo: I do Raquel.

Joey: Hey, Chandler, when you see Frankie, tell him Joey Tribbiani says hello. He'll know what it means.
Chandler: You sure he's gonna be able to crack that code?

Monica: It's just a little shorter than what we had discussed.
Phoebe: Would you relax? I know what I am doing. This is how he wears it.
Monica: How who wears it?
Phoebe: Demi Moore.
Monica: Demi Moore is not a he.
Phoebe: Well, he was a he in Arthur and in Ten.
Monica: That's Dudley Moore. I said I wanted it like Demi Moore.
Phoebe: Oh. Oh!
Monica: Oh my God!
Phoebe: Oh my God!
Monica: Oh my God!
Phoebe: Oh my God! I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm sorry! Which one's Demi Moore?
Monica: She's the actress that was in Disclosure, Indecent Proposal, Ghost!
Phoebe: Oh, she's got gorgeous hair.
Monica: I KNOW!!!

Frankie: How long do you want the cuffs?
Chandler: Well, at least as long as I have the pants.

Rachel: How is she?
Phoebe: It's too soon to tell. She's resting, which is a good sign.
Ross: How's the hair?
Phoebe: I'm not gonna lie to you, Ross, it doesn't look good. I put a clip on one side, which seems to have stopped the curling.

Joey: Can we see her?
Phoebe: Your hair looks too good, I think it would upset her. Ross, why don't you come on in?

Joey: Look, Rach, Rach! I've been with my share of women. (proudly) In fact, I've been with like a lot of people's share of women.

Joey: That's how they do pants! First they go up one side, they move it over, then they go up the other side, they move it back, and then they do the rear. (Chandler and Ross stare at him) What? Ross, Ross, would you tell him? Isn't that how a tailor they measure pants?
Ross: (to Chandler) Yes, yes it is. (to Joey) In prison!

Monica: Even Mary Tyler Moore would've been better.
Ross: I like it. I do, I think it's a "Ten."
Chandler: Oh Come on, Monica, things could be worse. I mean, you could "get caught between the moon and New York City. I know it's crazy, but it's true."

Joey: Hey, when the doctor does that hernia test...
Chandler: That's ok.