Susie: I can't do Chris's makeup. She refuses to acknowledge that she has a moustache.
Director's Assistant: Is it bad?
Susie: It looks like one of her eyebrows fell down. Now unless someone convinces her to let me bleach it, Jean-Claude Van Damme is gonna be making out with Gabe Kaplan.
Monica: Jean-Claude Van Damme. I didn't know he was in this movie, he is so hot.
Rachel: Ya think?
Monica: The muscles from Brussels. Wham-Bam-Van-Damme. Did you see Time Cop?
Rachel: No, was he any good in it?
Monica: Rachel, he like, totally changed time.
Rachel: What, so you go over there, you tell him you think he's cute, what's the worst that could happen?
Monica: He could hear me.
Rachel: Does anybody need anything?
Monica: Oh, I'll have an espresso. Oh actually, I'll get it. If I ask you to, you'll probably end up drinking it yourself.
Rachel: That is so unfair.
Phoebe: I know. Oh, like you would drink her coffee after what you did to her with Van Damme.
Chandler: Hey, stick a fork in me, I am done.
Phoebe: Stick a fork what?
Chandler: Like, when you're cooking a steak.
Phoebe: Oh, OK, I don't eat meat.
Chandler: Well then, how do you know when vegetables are done?
Phoebe: Well you don’t. You just, you eat them and you can tell.
Chandler: OK, then, eat me, I'm done.
Susie: Oh, shoot, we gotta go. Got a reservation in 30 minutes.
Chandler: Oh no no no no, no no no no no no, you see, what I had planned shouldn't take more that two, three minutes tops.
Phoebe: (to Rachel and Monica) You know what, if we were in prison, you guys would be, like, my bitches.
Susie: How come all I can think about is putting that ice in my mouth and licking you all over?
Chandler: Because I went to an all boys high school and God is making up for it.
Chandler: Alright, one of you give me your underpants.
Joey: Can't help you, I'm not wearing any.
Chandler: How can you not be wearing any underwear?
Joey: Oh, I'm getting heat from the guy in the hot pink thong.