Walter: With all due respect, Darwin got it all wrong. I used to make the joke that Darwin's thinking was rather... unevolved.
Peter: Which I'm sure used to be very funny.
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Astrid: The coroner's on the way with a body.
Walter: You know, this is the part of the day that I look forward to the most. When I know there's something bizarre out there, I just don't know what it is. Like a grab bag of disturbing events.
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Walter: He can be rotated onto his back now, drain the remainder of his brain. Once that's done, we can examine his cranial cavity.
Peter: Oh, this is gonna be awesome.
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Walter: All we know is that his brain matter has been completely liquefied. How? My first thought is an extremely virulent form of syphilis.
Olivia: You're saying that his brain could have been cooked by an STD?
Walter: Safe sex is important. You do always have your sexual partners wear a condom, I hope?
Peter: Walter...
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Walter: Oh, and be sure to check his floppy disks as well.
Peter: Floppy disks are a little outdated. Why don't you focus on what you do best? All yours--liquid brains.
Walter: Oh, fantastic. I'll get the bone saw.
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(checking a car dealership manager's corpse)
Walter: I wonder if they sell cars here with those seats that warm your ass?
Peter: Well why don't you ask him?
Walter: Hmmm? Maybe I will.
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Rachel: Do you do birthday parties too?
Peter: Not so much, no. Though I have done my fair share of babysitting recently.
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Peter: I tried to expense a couple of Celtic tickets on the FBI--she caught me.
Walter: Oh, I see. I hope she doesn't notice the $2,000 for the baboon seminal fluid I ordered. I hope I can recall why I ordered it.
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Olivia: He just called a cab. One guess where it's taking him.
Peter: Oh, come on. He cannot possibly be that stupid.
Olivia: He's 19.
Peter: Good point.
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Peter: Walter, there's a woman here who wants to talk to you.
Walter: She pretty?
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