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Get Smart (1965)
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| Title: | The Dead Spy Scrawls |
| Episode Number: | 18 |
| Season: | 1 |
| Season Episode #.: | 18 |
| Production Number: | 018 |
| Original Airdate: | Saturday January 22nd, 1966 |
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Max and 99 attempt to rendezvous with Agent 46 in a bus station. Agent 46 has information about an electronic brain KAOS uses to intercept Control’s messages. Before they can contact him, a KAOS agent murders 46, who scrawls a dying message in some cement: the contact information for a paid informer. Max meets the informer, but the KAOS agent strikes again, leaving Max with only one clue – the informer’s dying words: “shark pool mother.”
| There are no foreign summaries for this episode
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| Gadgets: Silenced pistol concealed in briefcase; silent signaling system; electronic brain concealed in pool table that opens when the certain numbered balls are sunk into specific pockets; dead spy scrawls cipher; shoephone; electronic cue ball steered by remote control in lipstick tube; shotgun concealed in a cue stick; tiny camera for surveillance photographs.
| The Shark complements Max on a particularly difficult shot, attributing the original to a poll player named "Three Fingers Yarmey." This is a sly reference to the fact that Don Adams (whose birth name was Yarmey) was actually a rather good pool player.
| Leonard Nimoy was a half year from the role that largely defined his career - that of Lieutenant Commander Spock in Star Trek. Over the next several years, Roy Engel will gain recognition among fans of The Wild Wild West for his recurring role as President Ulysses S. Grant.
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| 99: There’s agent 46! (Agent 46 adjusts his clothing.) He’s using the silent signal system!
Max: Right. I’ve got my book right here. Now, let’s see... touched his brim, rubbed his left arm, and hitched up his pants...
99: What did he say?
Max: He wants me to steal second base.
99: Max, that’s the spy baseball handbook!
| Max: I think I’ve got it, Chief. It’s really quite simple, Parker. You see, the electronic brain is located somewhere in the Philippine Islands...
Parker: Wrong.
| (Max has mistaken a newsvendor for his contact.)
Newsvendor: You gonna stand there all night, or you gonna buy something?
Max: That’s what I’m here for. I was waiting for you to notice the carnation.
Newsvendor: It’s beautiful.
Max: Thank you. How do we handle this?
Newsvendor: Just like it’s always been handled. I hand you the merchandise, you give me the money.
| Max: The brain! Where is the brain??
Informer: (dying words) Shark... pool... mother...
| Max: (on his shoephone) Hello, this is 86 calling Control... this is 86 calling Control... come in, Control... Hello, Chief? Max. The informer’s just been killed, but he left us a clue – and I didn’t have to pay a cent for it! No, I... don’t have the entire two thousand dollars, I have fifteen hundred of it... Well, of course I didn’t lose it, Chief! What do you think I am, stupid? I spend the other five hundred for a package of gum. (Max winces at vehemence of the Chief’s reply.)
| The Chief: One of the best pool players in town is a man known as The Shark. And he runs a place called Mother’s Family Pool Parlor!
Max: Just what are you saying, Chief?
The Chief: Well, if The Shark is a KAOS man, it’s just possible that the decoding machine could be hidden in Mother’s Family Pool Parlor!
Max: Then what you’re saying is... that if The Shark is a KAOS man, then the decoding ma...
The Chief: MAX!
| The Chief: Max, this is extremely dangerous! You’ll be on the spot, walking a tightrope, possibly facing a violent death!
Max: And... loving it!
| The Chief: By the way, how’s your pool?
Max: Don’t worry about me, Chief! I know the game inside and out.
The Chief: I was afraid you’d say that...
| Max: The Chief has got it a little wrong, Willie. I’m an expert at this game. You see, I happen to be the pool champion of the entire East Coast. Would you believe it, the entire East Coast!
Willie Marconi: I find that hard to believe.
Max: Would you believe... the West Coast?
Willie Marconi: I don’t think so...
Max: How about Steubensville, Ohio?
| (Max has already accidentally stabbed Willie Marconi with a pool cue.)
Willie Marconi: Alright, let’s get a game started.
Max: Right! I have a couple of shots that’ll knock your eye out!
Willie Marconi: I’ll bet you have!
| The Chief: This has gone far enough!! Max, you told me you were a good pool player, but you’re a fake and a fraud! You haven’t the vaguest notion of how to play pool!
Max: Just what are you getting at, Chief?
| Parker: For your protection, Smart, I’ve made a cue stick that is actually a shotgun!
Max: A cue stick that’s a shotgun? That’s fantastic, Parker! Uh, how does it work?
Parker: Well, to load it, you break it open in the middle.
(While Parker searches his pocket for a shell, Max picks up a cue and snaps it over his knee.)
Max: Oh, I hope I don’t have to load it in a hurry...
Parker: (pained) That’s... a regular cue stick, Smart. Here’s the shotgun.
| Max: Did you hear that, folks? I challenged him to a game and he refused. Looks to me like The Shark is chicken!
| 99: He’s out cold, Max!
Max: I know. I hope he hasn’t suffered a loss of memory. He owes me thirteen thousand dollars from the pool game!
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| Several of the close-up shots of 99 moving her lipstick remote do not match the observed motion of the cue ball it controls.
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| Dead Spy Scrawls
The episode takes its title from a language Control devised to permit seriously injured men to communicate before they died. It is an obvious send-up of The Dead Sea Scrolls, a large collection of documents dating to Biblical times. Between 1947 and 1955 some eight hundred documents in various states of preservation were discovered in caves about a mile inland of the Dead Sea.
| Willie Marconi, the expert who tries to teach Max how to play pool, is a take on pool legend Willie Mosconi. Born in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania in 1913, Mosconi was one of the games’ preeminent players, and has set several records related to the sport, including one for the largest verified number of consecutive balls sunk in pockets.
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