Good Eats: Churn Baby Churn II

Dismayed by ice creams so expensive stores must chain them to the freezer case and guard them with snippy clerks, Alton revisits the frozen treat he last addressed all the way back in episode six. He starts by inviting in three Federal agents in white who explain exactly what ice cream is, at least as far as your government is concerned. He goes on to explain the structural differences between grades and how that affects flavor and mouth “feel” and shares his painstakingly formulated perfect ratio of 9:8:3:2:1. Using this and illustrating the proper technique, he cooks some Vanilla Ice Cream and then shows how to modify it into Mint Ice Cream and Chocolate Ice Cream.

Currently 0/10
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10

No votes yet

Episode Info

Episode number: 9x4
Production Number: EA0905
Airdate: Wednesday July 13th, 2005

Writer: Alton Brown

Guest Stars

Alton Brown
As Federal Agent #1 / Hula Girl (voice) / Captain Sucrose (voice)

Recurring

Recap

Alton's in the grocery store checking out "premium" ice creams - foods so expensive this store chains them to the case and defends them with snippy clerks! There must be a better answer. Alton has one: make your own ice cream!..

Read the full recap

Episode Notes

Cards

Ice cream was served at England's Windsor castle as early as 1667.
Powdered milk is often added to ice cream mixtures to increase protein content and therefore improve texture.
In 1982, the world's largest sundae was created with 15,000 lbs. of ice cream, 120 lbs. of chocolate syrup, and 50 lbs of whipped topping.
George Washington, Dolly Madison, and Thomas Jefferson were all huge ice cream fans.
The modern hand-cranked ice cream freezer was invented in 1946 by a Philadelphia dairymaid named Nancy Johnson.

Locations include Harry’s Farmers Market, Marietta, Georgia.

After the production logo, Federal Agent #3 (who has until this point had no lines) tells Alton, “We’re watching you, little man!”

Episode Quotes

Obnoxious Clerk: Sir, can I unlock that Ralph & Jeremy’s Triple Choco-Latte Ginger Crunch for you?
Alton: I was just looking...
Obnoxious Clerk: Well, let’s keep on looking from the other side of the glass, shall we?
(The clerk takes the ice cream from Alton and returns it to the freezer.)
Alton: So that’s how it is... fine! I think this is a freezer case for... (Good Eats theme plays)

Alton: When melted, our pint of super premium ice cream is still eighty five percent its original volume, while our budget “lite” ice cream is only sixty two percent of its original volume. That means that the person who bought this (pointing to budget ice cream) ice cream bought a lot of air, or overrun. Which is not to say that air is necessarily a bad thing...

Alton: Having formulated and tested hundreds of different combinations, I have decided without a doubt that the best formula for a premium vanilla based ice cream is 9:8:3:2:1! (applause) Thank you, thank you.

Alton: Last but not least, on cup of heavy cream. That’s right, heavy cream. Look, I said I would help you make premium ice cream. I didn’t say anything about low carb ice cream, or low fat ice cream, or low anything else ice cream. As far as I’m concerned ice cream shouldn’t be low anything! It should just taste good!

Alton: The proteins in the eggs are very vulnerable to heat. Let’s just pretend for a second that those proteins are portrayed by this little hula dancer. Here’s how it works. (Alton puts a toy hula dancer on the counter and gets out a propane torch.) So, the proteins are just floating around in the eggs, and then here comes the oven’s intense heat!
“Hula Dancer”: (actually Alton) Oh, no! I’m going to roast and coagulate! Save me, Captain Sucrose!
“Captain Sucrose”: (still Alton) I’ll save you! I’m Sucrose!!
Alton: And Captain Sucrose, with his gigantic molecular structure, gets in between all that heat...
“Captain Sucrose”: (as Alton turns the torch on him) Ah, ah, ahhhh!
Alton: ... and the proteins.
“Hula Dancer”: Oh, thank you Captain Sucrose!
Alton: Well, Captain Sucrose... I think that’s gonna leave a mark...

Alton: Now, what is so special about 170º? Well, that’s the temperature where... (A small plastic toy salmonella bacillus emerges from the liquid.)
Toy Salmonella: Uck! Uck! It’s too hot in this jacuzzi. I’m getting’ outta here!! (it zips away)
Alton: Well let’s just say that at this temperature, salmonella doesn’t live here any more.

Alton: The reason I’m doing this over low heat is that the slower we heat the eggs, the better the custard will be, so take your time and your patience will be rewarded.

Alton: Extracts and oils contain volatile substances that will simply disappear into thin air if they get too hot. So it’s always a good idea to add them after the mixture has had time to cool down a bit.

Alton: Chilled mixtures freeze faster in the churn than non chilled mixtures, and that means that they have a finer ice crystal structure, and that means they have a better texture.

Alton: My first choice for everyday churning is still an electric machine that utilizes a liquid filled core that you park in your freezer overnight.

Federal Agent #1: So. Mr. Brown. We’ve had reports of suspicious and potentially dangerous substances here in your kitchen, so... we’re going to have to confiscate these containers (picks up all of Alton’s ice cream) pending further investigation by the, uh...
Federal Agent #2: National Dessert Board
Federal Agent #1: ... National Dessert Board. We’ll send the containers back via the mail.

Alton: Using a simple, easy to memorize formula, you will save dollars a pint, and keep yourself in a constant supply of some of the best eats on the planet.

Cultural References

The Trammps song “Disco Inferno” inspired the title of this series of ice cream themed outings. “Disco Inferno” contains the repeated line “burn, baby, burn... disco inferno.”

Ralph and Jeremy’s Triple Choco-latte Ginger Crunch premium ice cream is a parody of Ben & Jerry’s Ice Cream. Ben & Jerry’s is a premium ice cream and many of their flavors have fanciful names such as “New York Super Fudge Chunk” or “Stephen Colbert’s AmeriCone Dream.”

Alton Brown: "Thank you, thing!"
Alton reveals in "Behind the Eats" that his Thing is the son of the original Thing from The Addams Family (1964) (and played there by the hand of actor Ted Cassidy, who also portrayed Lurch on that series).

Alton tells viewers that at 170º, "salmonella doesn't live there anymore." That phrase owes its origins to the title of the 1974 Martin Scorsese helmed picture Alice Doesn't Live Here Anymore which told the story of a woman who picked up her life and moved it to Tucson, Arizona. It inspired the television series Alice (1976) that ran for nine seasons on CBS, and itself gave birth to a spinoff, Flo that ran for two seasons.

Episode References

This is Alton's second exploration of ice cream. The first can be found way back in the sixth episode ever, Churn Baby Churn.

Other Episode Crew

Click here to add other crew for Churn Baby Churn II

Missing Information

Click here to add Music
Click here to add Episode Goofs
Click here to add Analysis

Show Menu