Unwritten - Recap

Author Alice Tanner is in her study, desperately typing the last Jack Cannon: Boy Detective novel. Jack Cannon himself watches her as she finishes, and asks how it ends. She refuses to let him read it, and says that there won't be a next book. She locks the manuscript in her safe and tells him that he wouldn't understand. Alice caresses the scar on Jack's left cheek and says she can't do it any more, and then takes out a gun and prepares to shoot herself. Jack says he'll stop her, but Alice points out that he doesn't exist. As he disappears, Alice prepares to shoot herself, but has a seizure. The gun goes off, but only grazes her cheek. The maid, Christina, comes in and realizes that her employer is ill.

House is busy stealing candy and stuffed animals from a comatose patient when Wilson comes in and figures that House and Cuddy are having problems. House admits that he's worried because he's happy, and figures that once Cuddy snaps out of her endorphin rush, she'll leave him. Wilson is forced to admit that House and Cuddy have nothing in common. House that she'll dump him after several arguments and makeup sex, and figures he needs to find something in common with her. Wilson then tells him that Alice has checked into the ER.

House, a big fan of Jack Cannon, comes to see Alice in the ER. Alice claims that she just fainted, but House notices the powder burn. She offers to answer one question about anything if he finishes the exam, and he asks why she tried to kill herself. Alice denies it and dares him to stop her, and he puts her on a 72-hour psych hold.

House calls the team back for differential, but they don't see the point if Alice has psych problems. He insists that they take the case and orders Foreman and Taub to watch her overnight. When they wonder why Chase doesn't have to stay, House points out that Chase has a hot date outside.

House takes Cuddy to Alice's house and claims he's there to read her latest manuscript. Cuddy soon realizes that Alice is their new patient, and House brought her along for a break-in. Christina comes in and demands to know who they are.

Foreman and Taub try to treat Alice, who refuses to answer their medical questions. She insists that she intended to kill herself but the seizure stopped her, and demands a woman doctor once she realizes they don't have.

Christina explains that Alice threatened to fire her if she said anything about the gun, and explains that Alice is depressed and does nothing but write. House asks to see Alice's manuscript, but it's locked in the safe. He opens up Alice's old-style typewriter and removes the ribbon, and then notices a can of tuna in the wastebasket. Christina confirms that Alice eats two or three cans a day.

House returns to Alice's room and wakes up Taub, and then checks Alice. He notes that she's wet her bed, but doesn't know why.

The next morning, an exhausted Foreman and Taub try to stay awake while Chase comes in and can't resist gloating about the fact he didn't get any sleep, either. They suspect mercury poisoning brought on by the tuna, but Foreman warns that the tests don't confirm. Chase notes that low levels might not show up. When they warn that Alice will only let a woman doctor treat her, House tells them to give her chelation therapy, but realizes he can't get around Alice's request on his own. He goes to see Cuddy, who tries to ignore him because he mixed their personal and professional lives. House agrees to hire a temporary replacement for Hadley within a week if Cuddy convinces Alice to let the team test her.

Cuddy talks to Alice and explains House's theory. She smells perfume on Cuddy and realizes it was on House... and Christina, who is at her bedside. She fires the maid for betraying her trust, but then agrees to let the men treat her.

House is examining the ribbon when Wilson comes in and realizes that Cuddy went with House to commit crime because she's trying to find a way to connect with him. House agrees, but notes that they're not finding any.

Jack talks to Alice, and Taub and Chase realizes she's talking to thin air. She insists that it's her imagination, not a delusion, and then demonstrates her deductive abilities by explaining that Chase is recently divorced and slept with a girl at her place, and he doesn't plan to return her calls. Chase invites her to do Taub, and she realizes that he's a philanderer just like her ex-husband. As she gets upset, she has a seizure and Chase concludes it's an allergic reaction to the chelation therapy, until Taub notes he didn't administer it.

Back in differential, the team confirms that she doesn't have mercury poisoning. House is busy trying to decipher the typewriter ribbon, but still manages to confirm that her BP spiked before each seizure. Excess adrenaline from a pheochromocytoma is the likely cause. When the team is slow to respond, House sweeps their takeout into the wastebasket and tells them to get going.

When the team takes Alice into the MRI chamber, her leg starts emitting sparks. They determine she had three screws in her leg from a skiing accident, and they heated up in the MRI's magnetic field. House warns that she wants to die and can't trust anything she says. They wasted more time treating her new injury, and can't confirm the pheochromocytoma without the MRI. House comes up with a way to get Alice to cooperate and goes to see her. He tells her that he wants her to write more books, but she insists that she's done. Upon hearing that, House offers her a syringe with a narcotic overdose, and tells her that she has to choose to live or die. If he can make the pain go away, she'll want to live. Alice takes the syringe, and then injects herself with the narcotic.

When Alice wakes up, House explains that he didn't give her a lethal dose. He insists that if they can remove the pheochromocytoma, she'll get better. When Alice boasts that she'll be out, House explains that she found a lethal narcotic and injected it, meaning he can hold her for another 24 hours. Alice responds by telling him that in her next novel, Jack Cannon dies.

The team go over the scans they have but find no sign of the pheochromocytoma. They need Alice to provide accurate information, and House suggests they read the book. He notes the books also have Jack's Aunt Helen, who is the same age as Alice. He needs to read the book, however. He tells them to use ultrasound to scan for a tumor without touching Alice and then leaves.

Next, House calls in Sam for help and gets her to the MRI room. He plans to use the scanner to read the typewriter ribbon, and tricks her into coming. However, Sam is happy to help when she learns Alice Tanner is the patient, because she's also a Jack Cannon fan. She tweaks the MRI software to read the ribbon.

As House prints out the pages, Cuddy comes in and tells House that she's learned that she's going on a double date with Wilson and Sam... without House telling her. She's also not thrilled that House used a $3 million piece of hospital equipment to read a book. Cuddy then tells House to pick where they go on the double date, and figures that he knows her well enough to pick something they'll both enjoy.

Using the ultrasound, Chase detects a mass around Alice's heart. It's a pericardial infusion, which wasn’t there before. House focuses on the novel and explains that the final book ends with a cliffhanger with no resolution. Also, Helen in the book has contracted a mysterious illness with all of Alice's symptoms. She kills herself halfway through the book. Taub concludes that it's lupus, but House refuses to accept that since it's not curable. If they can't cure Alice, she'll kill herself when she's released. He orders retests to confirm.

House chooses a go-cart track for their date, after calling Cuddy's mother to find out she liked go-carts when she was 12. Sam loves the idea, and Wilson is worried because his parents never let them drive a go-cart. His girlfriend runs Wilson off the track, and then takes out Cuddy. House gets revenge by using his cane to pull out Sam's electrical cable, and then wins the race. Cuddy is unhappy because she injured her shoulder when the seatbelt pulled on it during her crash. As the attendant bans them for life, House gets an idea.

Back at the hospital, House tells Alice that she lied: the screws in her leg were from a car accident. When the shoulder strap cut into her neck, it injured her thyroid, and it's curable. He then reads her book to her and explains that she has hypothyroidism, and she can give Jack Cannon the story he deserves. As she yells at him, Alice suddenly discovers that she's paralyzed.

House wonders how he can be wrong about the thyroid, and Taub suggest a delayed syringomyelia brought on by the car crash. They can remove it from her spinal cord, and need her medical records from the accident to pinpoint the location. When they complain that they're tired, House tells them that Thirteen was the only man, and then tells Chase to pick a candidate.

Later, the team comes to see House and report that they can't find Alice's old medical records. Further, it doesn't matter because Alice is refusing the surgery. House figures she's lying for a reason and goes to see Cuddy. She admits she hasn't found a legal way to do the surgery without Alice's permission. House figures that Alice wants to punish herself for something that happened before she began writing, and Cuddy suggests that "Alice Tanner" is a pen name. While she checks the screws against the national medical records, House suggests that she also check the name "Helen."

Later, House goes to see Alice and explains that he always thought that Alice made Jack Cannon seem real. He's finally figured out that Alice's creation is based on her son, Jack. He died in the car crash, and had a cut on her cheek. Alice wants to die in peace, and claims that she killed him by letting him drive even though it was raining and he only had a learner's permit. As she talks, Alice sees Jack again. House tells her that he checked the autopsy results, and Jack had a brain aneurism. He died before the impact, and the coroner had no reason to check afterward. Jack would have died regardless. She looks up at Jack and admits that it wasn't her fault, and then tells House to go ahead with the operation.

House watches the operation, and Cuddy comes in to tell him that she's realized that Jack didn't have a brain aneurism. House admits that he lied, but only to make sure she kept writing Jack Cannon novels. Cuddy claims she likes the Jack Cannon novels, but House realizes that she's lying and Wilson told her that he was worried about having something in common with her. She tells him to talk about their relationship when he has a problem, and insists that she wants their "uncommon" relationship.

After the surgery, House comes to see Alice. She thanks him but says that she's not going to write any more Jack Cannon book. She figures the way she ended it is perfect, and each reader can decide Jack's fate for themselves. House is angry and starts to tell her the truth to change her mind. However, he reconsiders when he sees Cuddy outside, and maintains the lie. As he leaves, Cuddy starts to compliment him and he tells her to shut up.

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