Dr. House: The MRI show anything?
Dr. Foreman: Nothing.
Dr. House: Good. What fun would that be?

Nick Greenwald: I'll pretend to be macho while a guy stuffs three feet of plastic up my nose. (to Taub) It's too bad it's not your nose. Lots more room to maneuver.

Dr. Kutner: And no marriage either if our patient keeps saying everything that comes into his head without regard for the consequences.
Dr. Wilson: (to House) You always led me to believe you were one of a kind.

Nick Greenwald: I don't mean to be abrasive. Especially since you're such a pleasure to imagine naked. Again, sorry.
Dr. Hadley: It's okay.
Nick Greenwald: Thank you for understanding. I'd do you, you know. Really, my apologies. This stuff just...
Dr. Hadley: It's okay.
Dr. Cuddy: How's the patient?
Nick Greenwald: Whoa. I would do here in a minute with fudge and a cherry on top. Would someone please explain to this women? There's only so many apologies I can...
Dr. Hadley: He has frontal lobe disinhibition.
Nick Greenwald: I've already embarrassed myself with one doctor. Who, I am at this moment imagining with you, in a king-size bed with a mirror on the ceiling... I am so, so sorry. (to Cuddy) But if I couldn't have both of you together, you would definitely be my first choice.
Dr. Cuddy: Where's House?
Nick Greenwald: Like trying not to think of an elephant. Not that you're an elephant. Your breasts in fact are all homo sapiens.
Dr. Foreman: House isn't here.
Dr. Cuddy: Oh, he wouldn't have paged me if he couldn't watch and enjoy this.

Dr. Wilson: I'm not always nice. I'm not nice to you.
Dr. House: Because you know nice bores me. Hence, still nice.

Dr. House: Why do you think the world will end in chaos and destruction if you're not there to save it.
Dr. Wilson: Because when my parents put me in the rocket and sent me here, they said, "James, you will grow to manhood under a yellow sun."

Dr. House: Why did you hide that?
Dr. Wilson: Because the world revolves around you. I devote time to anyone else, you'd end up stalking me and harassing them.
Dr. House: You say that as though it wouldn't be fun.

Dr. House: You never take a walk unless you've got something you need to think about.
Dr. Wilson: Maybe you just don't have a good statistical sampling of my walks.

Dr. Wilson: Taub, another graduate of the House School of Being a Dick.

Dr. Wilson: I may have overreacted.
Dr. House: You definitely overreacted.
Dr. Wilson: I knew you'd meet me halfway.