Dennis: Let's have a board game night! Chinese checkers, I got, um—
Charlie: Well, that's kind of foreign.
Dennis: I got—I got Clue, you know. We could solve a mystery together. We could—
Charlie: Complicated stuff there.
Dennis: What about Connect Four? Connect Four's a fun game.
Charlie: Lot of counting.
Dennis: It's ... not that much counting. It's just one, two, three, and then four.
Charlie: But a lot—a lot of times you gotta count that much.
Dennis: Not that many times. If you get it once, you've won the game.

Mac: I'm gonna take this, and then, um, maybe a little bit later we can do some hand stuff?
Waitress: Are you in junior high?
Mac: Mouth stuff?
Waitress: Oh, my God...
Mac: Mouth stuff.

(Charlie and Mac talk via walkie-talkie)
Charlie: Hey, um, what was this jerk's name?
Mac: His name. Um ... Don?
Charlie: (scoffs) Don. Typical. You get a last name on this chump?
Mac: Yeah, Johnson.
Charlie: Yeah, sounds like a real sucker.

Dennis: Don Johnson? You don't find that a little suspicious?
Charlie: No... Should I?
Dennis: Don Johnson's the dude from Miami Vice, Charlie.
Charlie: I'm sure there's plenty of Don Johnsons running around Philly, dude.
Dennis: I don't think so. I don't think so.
Charlie: Well, then maybe he beat up the, uh, Don Johnson you're talking about.

Mac: OK, so as my blood brother, I need to confide a secret to you.
Dennis: You've been bangin' the waitress.
Mac: How'd you know that?
Dennis: You're my blood brother, man. I know more about you than you know about yourself.

(Mac and Dennis accidentally wake up Charlie from his sleep and tell him he's dreaming)
Charlie: Am I peeing?
Dennis: Are you peeing? (they look under the covers) Oh, geez, he's peeing!
Mac: He's pissing all over the bed! I told him he was gonna do it. I knew he was gonna do it. He drank too much. Goddamn it.
Charlie: Hey, guys, if I'm peeing, wake me up!

Mac: (pulling open a drawer of Dennis' sex tapes) Yeah! Here we go, W through Z. You should be under W, yeah?
Waitress: No, my name doesn't start with a W.
Mac: (finds her tape) "Waitress," here we go. "Waitress (Coffee Shop)," one star. Not good.

Dennis: Look, let's just find a hiding spot, OK?
Charlie: (crawling onto the bed) OK, good. I'm thinking if I get into bed and I get real low and flat and then you're underneath me or on top of me, you know, they won't see us.
Dennis: What—how—how does that work?
Charlie: OK, well, see, here's the problem. If I get all balled up and small, I get too high, and you'll see that there's someone in the bed. Now the further and wider I go—
Dennis: Uh-huh.
Charlie: The flatter I become, like a starfish, you know?
Dennis: But what in the hell are you talking about? Why would we wanna look like a starfish?

Waitress: (wearing Dennis' clothes) Why are these jeans so tight?
Mac: Because Dennis takes them all in at the thighs to accentuate his female form.

Dennis: (to Mac) What are you doing coming in here talking about how in love with my thighs you are?
Charlie: Yeah, or is it my creamy thighs you're after? I see you've taken to wearing my clothes, you sick freak.

Waitress: Thank you, Charlie. Thanks.
Charlie: You're welcome!
Waitress: I kinda don't know what else to say.
Charlie: Say, "I will have dinner with you, and thank you for this, and thank you."
Waitress: That doesn't make any sense.

Dennis: You were watching my tapes again?
Mac: Yeah.
Dennis: What'd you think?
Mac: You got weird balls.
Charlie: You should see Frank's balls. They're like planets.

Dennis: Don Johnson's the dude from Miami Vice, Charlie.

Don Johnson played Detective James "Sonny" Crockett in the '80s crime show Miami Vice.

Visual: The camcorder with a flashlight taped to it

Charlie taped a flashlight to his camcorder to film Mac for their public access news show in "Frank Sets Sweet Dee On Fire."

Dennis: How is he your best friend over me?
Charlie: Well, I mean, you banged the waitress.

Dennis banged the waitress in "Charlie Has Cancer."

(Mac walks into the darkened apartment after seeing the waitress)
Charlie: (turns on a light) A little late, isn't it?

This is very similar to the scene in "Mac Bangs Dennis' Mom" where Dennis enters the bar after his date with the waitress. Both episodes have Charlie sitting in the dark, turning on a single light, and making a derisive comment all while "Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairies" plays.

Visual: The waitress in Dennis' clothes

The duster that she wears was first worn by Mac in the episode "The Gang Solves the North Korea Situation," but it eventually ends up in Dennis' hands.

Mac: Frank made a sex tape, too?
Waitress: Yes, apparently he made a tape of us having sex when I banged him to get back at Dennis.

Frank banged the waitress in the episode "Mac Bangs Dennis' Mom." The waitress sees Dennis kiss Charlie's mom and go inside her home, so she sleeps with Frank to get back at Dennis.