Dennis: You cut the sleeves off of all your t-shirts. What, so you could show off your tats? Those are really original, dude.
Mac: They're tribal.
Dennis: Oh, they're—they're tri—I'm sorry, what tribe are you from?
Charlie: There's, like, no way that this is possible.
Dee: Well, did you have sex with her?
Dee: OK, did you use birth control?
Mac: Whoa, Dee, we went to Catholic school, so...
Tommy: You're ugly.
Charlie: You're ugly.
Tommy: You're ugly!
Charlie: You are the one that's ugly!
Tommy: You're ugly!
Charlie: You're ugly!
Dee: Charlie! Jesus Christ, are you almost thirty? Are you almost thirty years old?
Tommy: You have to buy me a toy!
Charlie: I don't have to buy you shit.
Tommy: If you don't buy me anything, I'm gonna tell my mom you took me to a black people's hospital.
Charlie: Wow. Oh, my God, that's racist.
Charlie: So is that cute little girl your...
Waitress: I'm her Big Sister.
Charlie: (looks at the girl) Oh. (looks back at the girl) Hm, that's weird. She looks Mexican.
Waitress: She is Mexican. It's the Big Sister program. She's not my real little sister.
Megan: Hey, you're really hardcore, aren't you?
Mac: Oh, well, you know. I mean, if you really wanna see hardcore... (hands her a piece of paper)
Megan: What's this?
Mac: That’s the list of doctors I'm gonna kill.
Megan: There's two already crossed out.
Mac: Yeah, I know.
Dee: Are you actually gonna throw away all your convictions for a chance to get laid?
Dennis: (laughing) I don't really have any convictions.
(at the abortion rally)
Dennis: You know what? I think all these chicks are gay.
Dee: Yeah, I don't know that they're gay. I think they can just smell how disgusting you are.
Dennis: (scoffs) Sucks for me.
Mac: Do you represent the Lollipop Guild, Charlie?
The Lollipop Guild is from the movie The Wizard of Oz. It's represented by three little munchkins who come out and sing while dancing in the same stilted fashion as Dennis, Mac, and Charlie.
Mac: I love the smell of protest in the morning.
Mac: I was quoting that movie. You know, Apocalypse Now, napalm in the morning.
Apocalypse Now is a film that takes place during the Vietnam War. Lt. Colonel Bill Kilgore remarks, "I love the smell of napalm in the morning."