| [–] |
Show Menu |
•
•
•
• (30)
•
•
• (4)
•
•
•
•
• (5)
• (7)
• (6)
• (5)
• (50)
• (1)
• (1)
• (1)
• (1)
•
• (6)
• (4)
•
• |
| [+] |
Empty Sections |
• (0)
• (0)
• (0)
• (0)
• (0)
|
| [+] |
Show Contribs |
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
• |
| [+] |
Episode Contribs |
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
• |
|
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia :: Charlie Has Cancer (01x04)
 |
Episode Information |
| |
| Title: | Charlie Has Cancer |
| Episode #: | 01x04 |
| Production Number: | IP01004 |
| Original Airdate: | Tuesday August 23rd, 2005 |
|
| |
|
 |
Episode Summary |
| |
[x] Remove Ad
When Mac and Dennis learn that Charlie has cancer, they attempt to find a woman so that he can get laid one last time. Mac suggests asking Carmen, a good-looking woman he has seen at the bar. Though she may be hot, she's actually a transsexual. The guys then decide to go after the woman Charlie has been pursuing: the waitress. However, they'll need help from Dee, who is in over her head trying to single-handedly run the bar.
| | There are no foreign summaries for this episode: Contribute |
| |
|
|
|
| Click Here To Watch Episode |
 |
Guest Stars |
| |
|
 |
Main Cast |
| |
|
 |
Featured Songs |
| |
| Artist | Song Title | Played When | | •Rick Astley | Never Gonna Give You Up | Dennis is in the car; montage with Charlie and Mac |
|
 |
Episode Quotes |
| |
Dee: Yeah, but Charlie's got such great hair. Is he gonna lose all of his hair?
Dennis: Yeah, he probably is.
Mac: Well, so what kind of cancer is it?
Dennis: I don't know, man.
Mac: Well, when does he go in for treatment?
Dennis: He didn't say. You know, we just stood there for a long time and didn't say much, you know, and we cried together, and I held him for a while, and that was it.
Mac: (skeptically) Mm-hm.
Dee: That is so sad. He is gonna look so bad without that hair. | Dennis: What's the one thing that Charlie never gets?
Mac: Laid.
Dennis: Right! | Dennis: I don't get it, Dee. There are tons of women in this city. Where do they go?
Dee: Uh, they're at the velvet rope clubs on Delaware Avenue.
Dennis: Why?
Dee: Dennis, our bar is in South Philly in a scary alley. Might as well call it Rape Bar. | Mac: Carmen, you have the most amazing body. Are you bulimic or what? | Mac: So Sweet Dee's in?
Dennis: Yeah, uh, under one condition.
Mac: What?
Dennis: She gets to punch you in the face. | Mac: (about Carmen) She's getting it removed.
Dennis: So what?
Mac: I'm just putting in my time, you know, so that afterwards—
Dennis: Gross, dude.
Mac: —I'll be first...
Dennis: Gross. | (Carmen sneaks up behind Mac and he accidentally punches her)
Man 1: That guy's beating on that chick!
Mac: On, no—you know, it's a dude. Yeah, she has a penis, so it's—it's OK.
Man 2: Dude, isn't that a hate crime?
Man 1: Shit yeah, it's a hate crime! | Charlie: Sometimes you gotta crack a few eggs to make an omelet.
Dennis: You gotta crack a couple eggs to make an omelet?
Charlie: Yeah, you gotta crack an egg.
Dennis: Oh, is that your new—so you're throwing down life lessons now, huh?
Charlie: I'm throwing down eggs!
Dennis: Huh, class is in session. The teacher's teaching class now!
Charlie: I'm—I'm cracking eggs of wisdom. | Dennis: The waitress doesn't even like you!
Charlie: Yeah?
Dennis: We had to pay her two hundred and fifty dollars to have sex with you!
Charlie: Ah-ha! Because ... sex? We didn't have sex. |
|
 |
Episode Notes |
| |
|   |
 |
Episode Goofs |
| |
|   |
 |
Cultural References |
| |
|   |
 |
Episode References |
| |
|   |
 |
Analysis |
| |
|   |
|