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When a baseball hits Bobby in the eye during a baseball game, the resulting black eye and Hank's short temper while dealing with a teenaged MegaLoMart worker cause a social worker to suspect Hank of child abuse. Meanwhile, Hank's friends, Dale, Bill, and Boomhauer try to fix Hank's truck.

Episode Info
Episode number: 1x1
Production Number: 4E01
Airdate: Sunday January 12th, 1997

Guest Stars
Ashley GardnerAshley Gardner
voiced Nancy Hicks Gribble, Various
David Herman (1)David Herman (1)
voiced Buckley, Anthony
Toby HussToby Huss
voiced Cotton Hill
Gailard SartainGailard Sartain
voiced Anthony's Supervisor

Stephen RootStephen Root
voiced Bill Dauterive
Main Cast
Mike JudgeMike Judge
voiced Hank Hill, Boomhauer, various
Kathy NajimyKathy Najimy
voiced Peggy Hill, various
Pamela AdlonPamela Adlon
voiced Bobby Hill, various
Brittany MurphyBrittany Murphy
voiced Luanne Platter, Joseph Gribble, various
Johnny HardwickJohnny Hardwick
voiced Dale Gribble, various
Episode Notes
An alternate title for this episode is "Bobby the Baseball Phenom."

This episode introduces the characters

Jeff Boomhauer

Dale Gribble

Nancy Gribble

Joseph Gribble

Bill Dauterive

Cotton Hill (although not named until later)

John Redcorn


Episode Quotes
Hank: It's hard, Peggy. I don't wanna lose my little boy, my only son. Oh, it's hard.
Peggy: Well, you can relax. The investigation has been off for a week. Only, Bobby didn't tell us.
Hank: I'll kill him!

Hank: If you want to win, you're gonna have to do better than your best.
Bobby: How do I do that?
Hank: You gotta give 110 percent. That's what'll give you that winning edge.
Bobby: But what if the Wildcats give 110 percent, too?
Hank: Well, then you gotta try even harder.
Peggy: How about if Bobby gave 112 percent?
Hank: Sure, that'd work.
Bobby: Or mabye 113.
Hank: Yeah, yeah, that's even better.
Peggy: No, I don't know. 13 is a very unlucky number.
Hank: Look, we're not talking about 13. We're talking about 113. And even... okay, give 112, what's the difference? Look, Bobby, just do your best, okay?

Luanne: Mamma's in jail. She was saving a quart of beer before bed, and daddy threw it out, and she went after him with a fork, and the trailer tipped over, and everything went upside down, and it's all gonna be on Real Stories of the Highway Patrol.

Hank: Now you listen to me, mister. I work for a living, and I mean real work, not writing down gobbledygook. I provide the people of this community with propane and propane accessories. Oh, when I think of all my hard earned tax dollars going to pay a bunch of twig boy bureaucrats like you, it just makes me wanna oh... oh, God.

Hank: Excuse me, where is the hardware department?
Buckley: The hardware department... Sir, what is it you're looking for?
Hank: The hardware department.
Buckley: Right, but what are you trying to buy?
Hank: Just tell me where the hardware department is!
Buckley: Sir, what are you trying to buy?
Hank: Fine, I want some WD40 and a "Tap and Die".
Buckley: Yes, and what are you trying to do again?
Hank: Buy some WD40 and a "Tap and Die"!
Buckley: Yes, and what is a "Tap and Die"?
Hank: Ah, forget it. Lets say I want a hammer. Do you know what a hammer is? That's what I want, a damned hammer.

Hank: Dale, you giblet-head! This is Texas! It's 110 degrees in the shade, and if it gets one degree hotter, I'm gonna kick your ass!

Dale: I know what's wrong with your truck, Hank. It's a Ford. Know what Ford stands for, don'cha? "Fix it again, Tony."
Hank: Dale, that's a Fiat.

Dale: We'll see what Butros Butros Gali Gali thinks about that, we'll grow oranges in Alaska.

Peggy: We would have had more children, but Hank has a narrow urethra.
Hank: Peggy!
Peggy: What?
Hank: He asked us how many children we had, he didn't ask you about my glands!

Boomhauer: (referring to Seinfeld) I tell you what, man, you see the part where dang ol' George come in there and he's talkin' 'bout tasting his own burp and Kramer comes slidin' in there, he always does that. Them New York boys, I tell you what... just a show about nothin'.

Hank: That boy ain't right.

Anthony: Loud is not allowed.

Episode Goofs
The aisle Hank walks down has lighting accessories and the bin of cardboard mailing tubes on his left side and light bulbs on his right, since he does not pass the bulbs as he approaches Buckley.

When the shot switches to over Buckley's shoulder, the aisle's contents have reversed, putting the light bulbs suddenly on Hank's right side.

They have reverted to their original position when we see down the aisle over Hank's shoulder.

Also, the pricing gun that was in Buckley's pocket has vanished.

When Hank & Peggy sit on their couch & talk to the social worker, the wall behind them has a chest of drawers w/ one mirror on the wall, but ...

... in one shot, the wall is full of framed photos ...

... and then changes back to the chest, mirror and bowl of fruit.

Bobby's shorts go from long green pants to green shorts between shots.

The flower pot and rain gutter are missing when viewed from inside the house.

The position of Bobby's stop sign changes from where he put it to where it is when Peg asks him who was on the phone.

Other Episode Crew

CreatorMike Judge  |  Greg Daniels
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