Episode Quotes
Eliot: Oh, I'm so in.
Alec: Hey, Eliot, what is that blocking your button cam? Oh, yeah, it's your ego.
Sophie: You definitely have things in common with her.
Nate: Like what?
Sophie: Well, um, she's a scientist and...well, um... you're--you're a bit nerdy, aren't you?
Nate: I'm a... I'm a bit nerdy?
Sophie: And, food--she works with food.
Nate: She works with food.
Sophie: Well, you eat, don't you?
Alec: Hey, look, man, where do you think my intel comes from. For the last time, there is no blueprint fairy.
Eliot: Hardison, we got a problem.
Alec: What kinda problem?
Eliot: They're MRI'ing my pizza and their stance says ex-CIA.
Alec: You can tell somebody worked for the CIA just from how they stand?!
Eliot: It's a very distinctive stance!
Creepy Homeless Guy: You know when I said you had pretty hair? I was lying.
Parker: Yeah, well, so was I when I said you didn't. Wait. Damn it!
Alec: This is the vice president of the frozen foods division, Erik Casten. Erik with a "K, "Casten with a "C."
Nate: How is that relevant?
Parker: Oh, Eric with a "C"--nice and friendly. Erik with a "K"--evil.
Sophie: I didn't know that.
Parker: Everybody knows that.
Alec: According to Dr. Jameson, Erik with a "K" is trying to cover up salmonella found in the frozen dinners so that his division doesn't have to pay out for that recall.
Eliot: That's why I grow my own food.
Sophie: How do you find the time?
Eliot: You make time. I only sleep 90 minutes a day.
Parker: You picked his pockets without actually stealing anything. Cool.
Alec: It's what I do. A man. A phone. No limits.
Eliot: How about "A man. A phone. No action." Come on, man, you left that out there like a hanging curveball.
Sophie: How come Parker gets to be the assistant?
Alec: How come Nate gets to be the magician? I do card tricks too. I do great card tricks.
Nate: Can we talk about this later?
Eliot: Does anybody want to do my job, huh? I get punched and kicked.
Eliot: How long is this gonna take?
Alec: As long as it has to take. You know, I was just pulled up to the ceiling of an elevator by my pants, so do not take that tone with me.
Parker: Next time, you jump down the elevator shaft.
Sophie: Oh, stop it. Everybody knows you love that.
(discussing Nate)
Eliot: He's fine.
Sophie: Oh.
Eliot: We practically had to beg him to come back, all right? He's not drinking, he's at the top of his game. I got to be honest with you, I can't even believe we pulled this one off.
Sophie: Well, that's the problem. He keeps winning. Every time he wins, he believes a little bit more that he can control... life.
Eliot: It's what gets him through the day.
Sophie: What happens when he loses? Last time he lost, it broke him. He breaks again, I don't think even we could pick up the pieces.