Phillip: We interrupt your regular programming to bring you this special report. Smart Kids still at large. Authorities search for clues to kids’ whereabouts. Meanwhile, the kids say, “Leave us alone. Don’t look for us. Don’t try to get us back. Or else.” We now rejoin our show in progress.
Jimmy: Phillip Manning, Amy Valdez, Dudley Nicholas. Twelve, eleven, and eleven. Three of the four kids who escaped from the Beckworth School last week. Did somebody say something about a... nose for news?
Dr. Carlton: What if they talk?
Lex Luthor: Well, they won’t. They’re too smart for that. If they do it’ll be their last taste of Metamide 5. Now, do you think that they’d risk it?
Dr. Carlton: No... the emotional dependence is too great!
Lois: Amy, if you and the other kids are in trouble, I can help. Who did this to you?
Amy Valdez: Did what?
Lois: Took you out of the school.
Amy Valdez: No one! We’re on our own, okay?!
Helga: (holding up Lex’s credit card) Refused. Over ze limit.
Lex: That’s impossible! I have a line of credit of five million dollars in that account.
Helga: Surrrre you do... (she crushes the card in one meaty hand)
Lex: (eyes widening) Would you... take a check?
Phillip: This just in. Water supply returns to normal. How did they do it? We’ll never know. Meanwhile, the kids say, “Leave us alone. It’s a big city. Lots more can go wrong with it.”
Lois: You took advantage of an interview situation to grab potentially incriminating evidence from an unsuspecting subject! I love that!!
Lois: Okay. So what did you find on Metamide 5?
Jimmy: It’s an organic stew. Amino acids, neurotransmitters, herbs, you name it. It’s so complex not even S.T.A.R. Labs’ computers can analyze it completely. They were able to produce a synthetic facsimile, though.
Jimmy: So, they’re testing the synthetic. Nothing conclusive yet, but, it seems to stimulate cerebral hyperactivity in lab rats.
Lois: Translation, please?
Clark: They got smarter.
Jimmy: A lot smarter.
Lois: These kids are on their own.
Clark: And somebody’s been using them as guinea pigs...
Phillip: If Metropolis wants Lex Luthor back in one piece, listen carefully. First, we want Amy Valdez released from custody. Second, we want promises in writing there’ll be no more attempts to find us. Third, our own island... a nice one with palm trees. Fourth, one hun... one thousand pounds of gooey bears.
Clark: I don’t know, Lois... Something tells me we haven’t seen the last of the Smart Kids.