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| Title: | Mr. Monk Goes Back to School |
| Episode Number: | 14 |
| Season: | 2 |
| Season Episode #.: | 1 |
| Production Number: | T1401 |
| Original Airdate: | Friday June 20th, 2003 |
| Airs On: | USA |
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When an English teacher was believed to have committed suicide at Trudy's former high school, the assistant principal called Monk in to investigate. He quickly concludes that it wasn't a suicide based on the suicide note left by the victim. He began to suspect the science teacher, Derek Philby to be the real murderer.
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Monk: You can't lick the queen. . . . There's an unwritten rule that says you can't lick the queen.
Sharona: You've been touching pieces left and right. You've been sexually harassing every piece on the board.
| Derek: You're mixing the regular with the decaf.
Monk: But they're even.
Derek: But they're mixed together.
Monk: But they're even.
Derek: But they're mixed together.
Monk: But they're even.
| Lunch lady: Mixed vegetables or mac and cheese?
Sharona: Can I have both?
Monk: Can I have neither?
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