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On their way to return a stolen laptop, Earl and Randy knock over a bus stop sign. Earl promises an elderly woman that he'll fix the sign after returning the laptop, but he is sidetracked by the computer's owner, the beautiful college professor Alex Meyers.
When Alex takes a keen interest in Earl and his list, the two begin dating, but Earl can't help but notice that he is constantly the target of bad accidents and random acts of violence. At first he chalks it up to plain old bad luck. Then Earl remembers that he has yet to fix the bus stop sign and decides that karma is punishing him for causing people to miss the bus every day.
Meanwhile, Randy embraces collegiate life and begins pledging a fraternity.
Earl: (to Alex) I can't be anyone's boyfriend. I'm karma's bitch.
Randy: Damn it. I can only think of things I can think of.
Randy: I never thought of drinking beer upside-down before.
Earl: Tastes the same.
Randy: Ya, but it goes to your brain before it gets to your livers.
Earl: She's not just hot. She's hot and smart.
Randy: Like a stewardess?
Alex Meyers: Nice outfit.
Earl: Thanks, I borrowed it from a frat brother, which is why the pants smell like bong water.
(Yelling into the sky.)
Earl: This is my list and I will cross things off when I choose, not you. I will not be karma's bitch.
Randy: Look, I like drinkin' and I love ridin' tricycles, but if someone hits me with a paddle, I'm gonna knock them on their ass.