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Nick has an opportunity to get closer to Sam when Sam asks his advice to impress a girl he likes. In doing so, Nick begins to feel like a father and ends up using a technique from his novel to help Sam get the girl. Meanwhile, Phil feels a spark when he meets the pizza delivery girl in unique circumstances. Elsewhere, Janet the Planet worries that Eddie is embarrassed to be with her in public during their first date; and Ikey continues to have an affair with Owen's wife.
Nick: Oh, umm ... So I heard that you and Eddie Latekka were hanging out. Are you guys becoming friends?
Aubrey: Why do you ask? Are you jealous?
Nick: Excuse me?
Aubrey: Do you want to be hanging out with Eddie Latekka?
Nick: Actually, yeah I do.
Aubrey: Give him time.
Hannah: The whole time I was yelling at him I just wanted to grab him and kiss him ... I wanted to grab him and kiss him. Oh my God, I wanted to grab him and kiss him!
Janet: Now that's advanced.
Phil: You have no concept of other people? Do you ... I mean, it’s like everyone is supposed to be on your schedule.
Eddie: You don’t leave the house. How is it that you’re the busiest guy I know?
Nick: Alright, phase one. First things first. You got to get her interest.
Sam: But I don’t play soccer.
Nick: You don’t get her interest by doing things she likes, that just makes you seem desperate.
Sam: Do you have a girlfriend?
Nick: We're just going to keep the focus on you. 'Kay?
Nick: Was the girl impressed?
Principal: Excuse me?
Nick: I’m just curious. If we’re to assume that he did this to impress a girl, I think it’d be nice to know if it had the desired effect.
Principal: I don’t see how that --
Hannah: Because if he did impress her he may be inclined to do it again.
Nick: We need to know.
Hannah: To dissuade him. Sam?
Sam: I think it did impress her. She laughed and giggled.
Hannah: A laugh and a giggle.
Nick: Wait, wait. What’s the difference?
Principal: What? What difference?
Nick: Between a laugh and a giggle.
Sam: A giggle happens after you realized you’ve --
Hannah: Laughed too much. It’s a subconscious thing.
Hannah: You’re embarrassed for laughing overtly so you devolve into a nervous giggle.
Principal: Excuse me! What are we doing here?
Sam: And I do believe there was a blush.
Hannah: A blush?
Nick: Ah, now did you hear that Principal Harrison? There was a blush.
Principal: Yes, extraordinary. I’d like you all to leave my office now.
Episode Title: Tomorrow's So Far Away
"Tomorrow's So Far Away" is a line from the Boston song "Amanda". The song is used in the episode during the Pumpkin Festival when Nick, Ikey, Owen, and Sam lip-sync to the song to impress Sam's crush.