Lassiter: Just so we're clear, just so there's no confusion, let me explain this one more time in terms I know you'll understand. Cops are here (holds up his hand), bounty hunters are here (holds up his other hand far below the first), psychics are here. (lowers his first hand directly above the second)
Gus: We beat bounty hunters.
(Shawn and Gus fist bump in celebration)
Lassiter: By a knuckle.
Shawn: Where are orthodontists on this scale?
Lassiter: I'm asking for your help. Don't make me ask twice.
Shawn: My God, Cole has amazing hair.
Gus: Shawn, focus.
Shawn: Did you smell it?
Gus: Of course I did—ginger blossoms. But who cares?
Shawn: I care, deeply. That's Kangaroo Paste.
Gus: Kangaroo what?
Shawn: Hair gel. You can only get it in Australia. I've been trying to get my hands on it for months. Maybe he has a contact from (in Australian accent) Down Under.
Shawn: My hair is hungry for it, Gus.
Byrd: Look, if I play my cards right, this is gonna be my last run. I'm gonna collect my 50 Gs, and then I'm quitting the game. I'm retiring.
(Shawn ducks and looks around)
Shawn: My bad. Usually right when someone's about to retire they get shot at, yeah?
Shawn: Just because we didn't go to the costume shop and get a bounty hunter's wrist bracelet and accessories kit doesn't mean that we won't be bringing it in a big way.
Byrd: Go ahead and bring it. Be careful out there. People get hurt. Oh, and by the way, (holds up his wrist) these don't come in "tiny." (leaves)
Shawn: (scoffs) We'll just get a women's large.
Shawn: (to Gus) Dude, we're, like, the best bounty hunters ever! The criminals come straight into our car—already cuffed!
(Shawn talks to Juliet over the phone)
Juliet: Shawn, where are you guys? Let us send some black and whites.
Shawn: (to Gus) You want a black and white cookie? Tancana, you want a cookie?
Gus: Now I'm gonna head home, take a long nap, and wait for the bruises to show up on my wrist.
Shawn: That actually sounds pretty good. I'll come along. It's been a long time since we've napped together.
(Shawn and Gus discover their boat is missing)
Gus: You didn't tie up the boat?
Shawn: Me? Last guy off the boat ties it up! Everyone knows that!
Gus: You asked for the rope! Why would you ask for the rope if you didn't intend on tying it up, Shawn?
Shawn: What are you, the ambassador of rope etiquette?
Shawn: Hey, what are you doing right now?
Byrd: Oh, right now? Oh, I'm about thirty seconds away from collecting fifty thousand bucks. That's what I'm doing.
Shawn: Ooh, fifty thousand dollars. Nice, that's very exciting. That's a lot of shot glasses that say "Byrd" on them.
Shawn: (to Byrd) And now, all that money (laughs) is in my briefcase. (to Gus) Is this a briefcase or an attaché?
Gus: I think it's a briefcase. Attachés have a softer shell.
Shawn: Really? That's all that differentiates them, a softer shell?
Gus: Well, "attaché" does have a better ring to it.
Shawn: Let's go with attaché.
Lassiter: (to Byrd) Pass me the satchel.
Shawn: Ooh, satchel. I didn't think of that one.
Shawn: Well, I guess you have to get home and feed your parrot.
Juliet: Shawn, I don't have a parrot.
Characters: Byrd Tatum
Byrd is a parody of real-life bounty hunter Duane "Dog" Chapman, star of the reality show Dog the Bounty Hunter. Besides sharing animal-inspired names, the two also have similar looks and demeanors.
Shawn: (about Byrd) Same vest, same Shaun Cassidy hair.
Shaun Cassidy, half-brother to David Cassidy from the television show The Partridge Family, is an actor and singer. He became a teen idol in the late '70s.
Byrd: I don't need you peons screwing this up for me, you got it? I just put a down payment on a bar in Key West.
Gus: Who were the other investors, Tango and Cash?
Tango & Cash is a film starring Sylvester Stallone as Tango and Kurt Russell as Cash, two cops who can't stand each other. When the two are framed for murder and imprisoned, they must work together to clear their names.
Shawn: (to Gus) Remember how sad you were when you ran into Judge Reinhold at the dry cleaners?
Judge Reinhold is an actor who has appeared in a variety of movies and television shows. He is perhaps best known for his role as Detective Billy Rosewood in the Beverly Hills Cop films.
Shawn: (to Gus) Well, look at it this way, now you've got a story if you ever go on Letterman.
David Letterman has been the host of CBS' Late Show with David Letterman since 1993. Before this, he hosted the NBC show Late Night with David Letterman for eleven years.
Shawn: Dude, I'm pretty sure this is the boat from Dead Calm.
Gus: Great, now we have to worry about Billy Zane, too?
Dead Calm is a thriller in which Billy Zane plays Hughie Warriner. When a husband and wife come across him and his sinking boat, they soon find out that he has murdered the entire crew. Hughie then kidnaps the wife, leaving her husband on the sinking ship.
(Shawn and Henry talk on the phone)
Henry: Was that a gunshot?
Shawn: No, don't be ridiculous! We're just, we're sitting in the Psych office watching a movie—Midnight Run, have you seen it?
Midnight Run is a film about a bounty hunter, played by Robert De Niro, who catches a criminal, played by Charles Grodin, and must transport him across the country to collect his reward.
Shawn: Just pretend like we're in Road House.
Gus: Fine, but I'm Patrick Swayze.
Shawn: Sam Elliott.
Road House is a film starring Patrick Swayze as James Dalton, a professional barroom bouncer, and Sam Elliott as Wade Garrett, Dalton's mentor.
Gus: (to Shawn) Maybe if someone would have tied up the boat, we wouldn't have been swimming around like the couple from Open Water.
Open Water is a film based on the true story of a couple who accidentally gets stranded in the middle of the sea when their scuba diving group leaves without them.
Shawn: (to Tancana) And you can tell him all about our good times at Camp Tiki Barber.
Tiki Barber is a former football running back for the New York Giants. He currently works as a sports broadcaster.
Shawn: Gus, you don't want this to be a repeat of the time I told you what happened at the end of WarGames. You didn't talk to me for a week.
WarGames is a film starring Matthew Broderick as David Lightman, a high school student who has amazing skills as a computer hacker. When he accidentally hacks into NORAD's defense computers, he must try to prevent starting World War III.
Gus: (about Byrd) You know what, Shawn? Let's get out of here. This guy wouldn't know a good deal if it bit him in the seat of his Han Solo action figure pants.
Han Solo is a character in George Lucas' epic Star Wars films.