Sock: Hey Mom, did you see me shoot Ben in the butt?
Ms. Wysocki: Yes I did. Good shootin', Bert, very good shot.
Sock: Would somebody get me a six-pack? That’s what my mom would have done.
Sock: Sometimes if you love somebody enough, you got to let them hit rock bottom.
Andi: Hey, do you know where Sock is? I need him to fake a seizure.
Sam: That is an unusual request.
The Devil: I don’t know. There’s something about the sea air. You know?
The Devil: Maybe it’s because all of life came from the sea. It’s primordial, clean, fresh, and almost entirely covers up the stench of that decomposing corpse down there.
The Devil: If I’m hearing you correctly, you’re basically calling me a morally bankrupt, evil being.
Sam: Yes, more or less.
The Devil: Then this makes perfect sense. (shoves him into the water)
Sam: Next time I buy a present for a girl, I need you to punch me in the junk. Hard.
Sock: That’s the only way I punch.
Sam: Not now!
Sock: Will you listen to this guy? Wah-wah-wah. I’ve got two chicks fighting over me, what am I going to do, why am I so loveable. Shut up. Enjoy it, Sam, at least try to flip it into a three-way, that’s what I’d do.
Ben: Hey this guy Ryan’s pretty lame. “This CD Is for all of the dream who dream of the rock-n-roll dream, so dream on.”
Sock: I’ve got to side with the Devil on this one: some people belong in Hell.
Sock: We’re from downtown. Downtown branch.
The Devil: We’re talkin’ about rock-n-roll, man.. The Devil’s music. Comin’ down the crossroads. Sell your soul for rock-and-roll, baby.
The Devil: And you know moms. They love talkin’ about their kids.
Sam: Even when their kid’s a people eater.
The Devil: Well, it’s just more to talk about.
Sock: Gets me, right here. Right… right here. Is it… where’s your heart? On the left?
The Devil: (to Sam) You’re utterly unthreatening. When you say “Devil” it sounds kind of cute.
Sock: Oh sweet muscular Mary!
Rachel: I just don’t know if I can believe you, Ryan. You told me a thousand times you were gonna give up rock-and-roll for me.
Ryan Milner: But now I have no feeling in four of my five fingers.
Ryan Milner: Numb.
Rachel: Really numb?
Ryan Milner: Bear chomp.
Sam: You said you wouldn’t be mad!
The Devil: No, this isn’t me mad, Sam. This is me disappointed. You should see me when I’m mad. It’s really something.