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Royal Pains: Me First

Hank's new patient is a fearful young boy with asthma being cared for by a nanny, who ends up being a patient as well; Paige's long kept secret is revealed due to a medical emergency; Divya goes on her date with Dr. Van Dyke.

Episode Info

Episode number: 3x9
Production Number: RP309
Airdate: Wednesday August 24th, 2011


Guest Stars
Brooke DBrooke D'Orsay
As Paige Collins
Bob GuntonBob Gunton
As General William Collins
Kyle HowardKyle Howard
As Dr. Paul Van Dyke
Lisa BanesLisa Banes
As Ellen Collins
Tanner FloodTanner Flood
As Simon Field
Madeline ZimaMadeline Zima
As Toby Thompson

Co-Guest Stars
Lou CarbonneauLou Carbonneau
As fisherman Bob
Kelsey CookeKelsey Cooke
As bartender
Chella FerrowChella Ferrow
As Ms. fearless
Rob HancockRob Hancock
As Mr. fearless
Nancy MeyerNancy Meyer
As guest
Main Cast
Mark FeuersteinMark Feuerstein
As Hank Lawson
Paulo CostanzoPaulo Costanzo
As Evan Roth Lawson
Jill FlintJill Flint
As Jill Casey
Reshma ShettyReshma Shetty
As Divya Katdare


Paige is coordinating a fund raising party for her father's Senate campaign. She goes inside to talk with her mother Ellen who is sitting alone in her bedroom. Paige tries to engage her in conversation about the party but her mother is clearly depressed about something. When Paige turns her back, Ellen disappears from her room...

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Episode Notes
Episode viewers (millions): 5.53

ArtistSong TitlePlayed When
Abi Phillips Feat. FugativeSummer Sunshine 
APM MusicKeel Row 
Capital CityWho's That Dude 
Hooded FangYounger Days 
Ryan Adams (1)TwoEvan & Paige makeup, Hank & Jill play with Simon
VibroluxSexy Surf 

Episode Quotes
Hank: Last I heard you thought she (Paige) was hiding something.
Evan: You know what? Total misunderstanding, she wasn't hanging out with that art dealer Kassabian dude, she was on a campaign trip.

Evan: Man I'm awesome at this engaged to be engaged thing!
visual: Evan starts filling the cream puffs.
Evan: Doink!, Doink!
Hank: Don't make that sound.

Hank: I got here before the paramedics?
Paige: (sobbing) I never called 911.
Hank: Why not?
Paige: I didn't want to involve them.
Hank: Involve them in what?

Hank: What about her (Ellen) psych evaluation?
Paige: The psychiatrist wants to come back when she wakes but, I'm afraid she won't want to stay.
Hank: She may not have a choice. She was walking in her nightgown toward the ocean. I'm worried and I think you are too about what she might have done if she hadn't fallen down the stairs, if she'd made it to the beach. That's why you were running after her, isn't it?

Paige: Evan!
Evan: Hi. When did you get back?
Paige: Ahh, just a little while ago, what are you doing here?
Evan: I'm just delivering a surprise, but now it looks like the surprise is on me.

Evan: Was there a campaign trip?
Paige: No.
Evan: Did you even leave town?
Paige: No, but I...
Evan: So you lied to me? This isn't the first time, is it?
Paige: No, but Evan please let me expl...
Evan: Who is it? Is it Eric Kassabian?
Paige: What?
Evan: You're obviously seeing someone Paige. God it sure explains all the last minute trips and the secret phone calls.
Paige: You think I'm cheating on you?
Evan: I should have seen this. When I met you, you were lying to your parents and your boyfriend!
Paige: You've got me all figured out. So now what?
Evan: You tell me Paige, you love telling stories. Actually they're not stories at all, they're just lies.
Paige: You know what? Forget it. We're over! Done!

General William Collins: Just give your brother a message. You tell him he had no right to take my wife to the hospital, then try and force her into a psychiatric hold!
Evan: What?
General William Collins: You tell him I brought Ellen home, and she's not going back and if she needs a doctor, I will find her one!

General William Collins: Don't you work with your brother? How could you not know this?
Evan: Yeah, that's a very good question sir.

Hank: I've been hinting for weeks.
Evan: Oh you've been hinting? You don't hint. This is not a game, this is my life.
Hank: Evan, you're right, it's not a game. But I'm bound by doctor patient confidentiality.
Evan: Do not pull that doctor crap! I'm your brother!! Nothing is more important than family!

Divya: There's not going to be a next date.
Dr. Paul Van Dyke: It was the mouth-to-mouth thing, wasn't it? That was dumb, I'm sorry. My dating skills never progressed past high school.
Divya: You were doing that in high school?

Episode Goofs
Hank breaks a large window in the front door of Simon and Toby's house, shattering the glass into the front hallway, but later scenes show no glass on the floor.

Cultural References
Hank: (to Divya) I haven't kept a secret from him (Evan) since I broke his Han Solo and blamed the dog.

Han Solo is a fictional character from the Star War series of movies and Hank is referring to an action doll made in Han Solo's likeness.

Episode References
Hank: That's what you approached me about earlier this summer?
Paige: Yeah. I couldn't tell you the truth or anyone, it just wasn't my secret to tell.

In episode 3x02 But There's A Catch, Paige started to ask Hank for medical advice but balked when Hank was reluctant to keep the information from Evan.

Hank: I wanted to tell you, you have no idea how badly I wanted to. When we were in Florida, I tried to...
Evan: Florida? How long have you known?

In episode 3x04 The Shaw/Hank Redemption, While in Florida for their father's parole hearing, Evan tells Hank he is going to propose to Paige and Hank surprises him by being less than enthusiastic, knowing that Paige is keeping something from Evan.

Other Episode Crew

CreatorAndrew Lenchewski  |  John P. Rogers
Executive ProducerAndrew Lenchewski  |  Jeff Kwatinetz  |  Paul Frank  |  Rich Frank  |  Michael Rauch
Co-Executive ProducerConstance M. Burge  |  Kerry Orent  |  Carol Flint  |  Jon Sherman
ProducerKathy Ciric  |  Antonia Ellis (1)
Co-ProducerJessica Ball (2)  |  Mark Feuerstein  |  Irv Danesh
Consulting ProducerJack Bernstein
Associate ProducerMargo Johnston
Production DesignerRay Kluga
EditorGary Levy
CastingSteven Jacobs (2)  |  Bonnie Finnegan
Unit Production ManagerKathy Ciric
First Assistant DirectorRobert C. Albertell
Second Assistant DirectorBrendan Walsh (1)
MusicJames S. Levine
Music EditorLesley Langs
Music SupervisorAlicen Catron Schneider  |  Oliver Hild
Costume DesignerCaroline Duncan
Key GripSal Lanza
Camera OperatorOliver Cary  |  Carlos Guerra  |  Michael Caracciolo
Set DecoratorMila Khalevich
Location ManagerMichael Fucci
Property MasterRuth Dipasquale
Construction CoordinatorRonnie A. Petagna Jr.
Production Sound MixerBrian Miksis
Script SupervisorDeirdre Horgan Aska
Production CoordinatorBrette Billow
Script CoordinatorHelen Berger
Assistant EditorMatthew S. Nickelson  |  Marnee Meyer
Supervising Sound EditorLouis Bertini
Re-Recording MixerBob Chefalas
LeadmanChris Vogt
GafferSteve Ramsey
On-Line EditorPat Kelleher
Director of PhotographyJoseph R. Collins
Story EditorSimran Baidwan
Stunt CoordinatorCort Hessler
Production SupervisorPeter Sabat
Art DirectorKevin Rupnik
Assistant Production CoordinatorJohn Sesumi
ConsultantJohn P. Rogers
Makeup Department Head Francesca Buccellato
Art Department CoordinatorMichael Dicenzo
Visual Effects SupervisorChris Healer
Main Title DesignJ. John Corbett  |  Randall Balsmeyer
Production AccountantLynda Van Damm
Transportation CaptainSteven R. Hammond
Location ScoutBrendan Kehoe  |  Shannon Dennard
Casting AssociateCandice Alustiza
Original CastingSusie Farris
Post SupervisorSam Friedlander
ColoristRoger Doran
Assistant To The Executive ProducerTeresa Ingram  |  Chris Luttrell  |  Priscilla Crowe  |  Laurie Ferneau  |  Woody Strassner
Assistant Costume DesignerMegan Kasperlik
Assistant To The Co-executive ProducerCharlie Kessler
Assistant AccountantErnesto Alcalde
Hair Department HeadAnna Hilton
Digital Imaging TechnicianDavid Satin
Post CoordinatorDavid McElfresh
Special Effects Make-upCraig Lindberg
Wardrobe SupervisorShelby Saboy
Assistant Location ManagerCharles Crowell  |  Christopher Arena  |  Stephen Hartman
Charge Scenic ArtistJoseph Garzero
Main Title Theme Performed ByThe Blue Van
"A" Camera First AssistantJohn R. MacDonald
Location AssistantCheryl Martin  |  Jay Scala  |  Joe Castellaneta
Loop Group CoordinatorSondra James
Background CastingGrant Wilfley
"B" Camera First AssistantMalcolm A. Purnell
Transportation Co-captainPeter Clores
Background Casting AssociateJoanna Vanadia
Locations CoordinatorElvis Cornea
Parking CoordinatorCisco Marcial
Missing Information
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