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Royal Pains: Hammertime

The auction of Boris' estate begins with an unexpected guest. Divya treats an older married couple who are still deeply in love and causes her to wonder about her own future.

Episode Info

Episode number: 5x8
Airdate: Wednesday August 07th, 2013

Director: Allison Liddi
Writer: Jack Bernstein

Alternate Airdates:

AU (Seven) Aug 26, 2014


Guest Stars
Stephen SpinellaStephen Spinella
As Russell Berger
Callum BlueCallum Blue
As Milos Kuester Ratenicz
Robert KleinRobert Klein
As Bert Jones
Beverly ToddBeverly Todd
As Bea Jones

Co-Guest Stars
John Hans TesterJohn Hans Tester
As Udo
Franklin Ojeda SmithFranklin Ojeda Smith
As Frank
Erik HegerErik Heger
As Wade
Gildo SpadoniGildo Spadoni
As Auction Security Boss
Main Cast
Mark FeuersteinMark Feuerstein
As Hank Lawson
Paulo CostanzoPaulo Costanzo
As Evan Roth Lawson
Reshma ShettyReshma Shetty
As Divya Katdare
Brooke DBrooke D'Orsay
As Paige Adele Collins
Campbell ScottCampbell Scott
As Boris Kuester von Jurgens-Ratenicz


In the middle of the night, Evan stumbles upon a meeting between Hank and Boris. It is the first time Evan has seen Boris since he faked his death. They all talk about Milos and agree to stick to the plan of trying to lure him out with the fake clinical trial and auction...

Read the full recap
Episode Notes
Bert was diagnosed with glomerulonephritis, a kidney disease.

Episode viewers (millions, Live + Same Day): 3.60

Episode Quotes
Hank: We were just trying to come up with a contingency plan in case we have to call the whole thing off.
Evan: What do you mean, call it off? You can't call it off. Milos is a monster, Henry. He tried to kill Marisa when she was pregnant. He tried to kill Boris. He succeeded in killing...
Boris: I assure you, Evan, one way or another, Milos will answer for his sins.

Evan: There is a murderer in our powder room.
Hank: Calm down. We'll figure it out.

Paige: So if Wade asks, which he will, can I give him your number?
Divya: What are you talking about?
Paige: He was totally flirting with you.

Milos: I'm Milos Kuester-Ratenicz.
Paige: Oh, Kuester-Ratenicz. You're related to Boris?
Milos: Yeah, he was my cousin.

Paige: Milos, why don't you have dinner with Evan and me tonight? In fact, you should stay at Shadow Pond. There's plenty of room.
Evan: Well, you know what, actually...
Milos: No, no, I would be delighted.

Divya: Our new patient Bea was admitted
for a severe allergic reaction to penicillin.
Hank: Why was she prescribed penicillin?
Divya: She wasn't. Her husband Bert was. He was giving it to her.
Hank: Why was he giving it to her?
Divya: He wasn't giving it to her. He was... he was giving it to her.
Hank: Oh. Okay. All right, Bert.

Boris: My grandfather built this entire house himself, all 109,000 square feet of it. Even I don't know all of its secrets.
Hank: Boris, Milos was never supposed to get this close. You're putting innocent people at risk, people I care about.

Hank: (to Boris about Milos) The genetic disease can affect bones and muscles, but the third element is... dementia. Milos wasn't trying to leave because he's suspicious. He was leaving because he's delusional.

Bea: Don't put so much pressure on yourself. Life is long and wonderful. It ebbs and flows like the perennials in my garden. Sometimes they're in bloom, sometimes they're not, but they're always alive.
Divya: So I'm going through a dormant period.
Bea: Exactly.

Milos: We are blood, Boris. Share the cure.
Boris: Mila... cousin... There is no cure. The cure is a fairy tale, like the Count of St. Germain. You tried to kill me, to kill my family, you murdered Dima for something that never existed. It does not exist.
Milos: You're a liar.

Boris: It's over, Hank. Hopefully, this is the end of generations of violence in my family.
Hank: And a new beginning for you.
Boris: We shall see.

Cultural References
Bea: (to Divya) Then my grandson told me about Facebook. And when I looked, there he was, as handsome as ever.

Facebook is a social media web site that has reached global popularity.

Other Episode Crew

CreatorJohn P. Rogers  |  Andrew Lenchewski
Executive ProducerConstance M. Burge  |  Andrew Lenchewski  |  Michael Rauch  |  Carol Flint  |  Rich Frank  |  Paul Frank  |  Jeff Kwatinetz
Co-Executive ProducerJack Bernstein  |  Jon Sherman
Supervising ProducerAntonia Ellis (1)  |  Jessica Ball (2)
ProducerKathy Ciric  |  Jeff Drayer  |  Mark Feuerstein
Associate ProducerMargo Johnston  |  Karen Clark
Production DesignerRay Kluga
EditorGary Levy
CastingSteven Jacobs (2)  |  Bonnie Finnegan
Unit Production ManagerKathy Ciric
First Assistant DirectorEric Yellin
Second Assistant DirectorDeanna Leslie
MusicJames S. Levine
Music EditorLesley Langs
Music SupervisorOliver Hild  |  Alicen Catron Schneider
Costume DesignerCaroline Duncan
Key GripSal Lanza
Camera OperatorCarlos Guerra
Set DecoratorMila Khalevich
Location ManagerMichael Fucci  |  Peter Sabat
Property MasterPeter Dancy
Construction CoordinatorRonnie A. Petagna Jr.
Production Sound MixerBrian Miksis
Script SupervisorMary A. Kelly
Production CoordinatorBrette Billow
Script CoordinatorHelen Berger
Assistant EditorMarnee Meyer  |  Matthew S. Nickelson  |  Myles Sorensen
Supervising Sound EditorLouis Bertini
Re-Recording MixerBob Chefalas
LeadmanChris Vogt
GafferSteve Ramsey
On-Line EditorPat Kelleher
Director of PhotographyJoseph R. Collins
Stunt CoordinatorCort Hessler
Art DirectorJordan Jacobs
Assistant Production CoordinatorRyan Wilson  |  John Sesumi
Post Production CoordinatorDavid McElfresh
Medical AdvisorAudie Liametz
Executive Story EditorAubrey Villalobos  |  Simran Baidwan
ConsultantJohn P. Rogers
Makeup Department Head Francesca Buccellato
Art Department CoordinatorAlyson Wellins Lewin
Visual Effects SupervisorLuke DiTommaso
Main Title DesignJ. John Corbett  |  Randall Balsmeyer
Production AccountantLynda Van Damm
Transportation CaptainSteven R. Hammond
Casting AssociateSabrina Hyman
Original CastingSusie Farris
ColoristMark Wilkins
Assistant To The Executive ProducerAlice Elizabeth Hunter  |  Caty Zick  |  Hillary Messenger  |  Chris Luttrell
Assistant Costume DesignerJared B. Leese
Assistant AccountantMichael Drew Collins
Hair Department HeadAnita Roganovic
Digital Imaging TechnicianLewis Rothenberg
Best Boy GripColin Keech
Special Effects Make-upCraig Lindberg
Wardrobe SupervisorKenn Hamilton
Charge Scenic ArtistRalph Cava
Main Title Theme Performed ByThe Blue Van
"A" Camera First AssistantJohn R. MacDonald
Loop Group CoordinatorSondra James
Background CastingGrant Wilfley
"B" Camera First AssistantMalcolm A. Purnell
Transportation Co-captainPeter Clores
Background Casting AssociateSteven Vago
A Dolly GripMatt Staples
B Dolly GripJon Vendetti
Key Rigging GripThomas Yostpille
Company GripKurt Schreiber  |  Reid Kelly  |  James Saluzzi
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