Russell: Jen, it's kinda common knowledge that you're always good to go.
Jennifer: Ouch! Insulted by someone who looks like they're in the middle of gender reassignment.
Adam: But the question is, which way is he going?

Timmy: Look, Allison believes that sex is not the way to begin a meaningful relationship, and I concur.
Russell: Yeah, good luck running that three legged race by yourself.
Timmy: Of course that's how you feel, why spend time getting to know a woman when it merely increases her chances of picking you out of a lineup.

(Russell observes Timmy moving his hand back and forth beneath his desk)
Russell: Umm, Timmy! Timmy if you have to do that at work, take it in the men's room.
Timmy: Sir, I am only trying to get the last of the white out.
Russell: Year, I know, I've been there. Take it in the men's room fella!
Timmy: (Holding up a bottle of Whiteout) Sir, this white out!

Timmy: Well, I'm sorry but yes, I'm a bit pent up!
Russell: Well, don't you worry, Uncle Russell's gonna help you release the pressure,
Timmy: Look, I don't care how soft and ladylike your hands are, the answer's no!