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Click Here To PrintSeinfeld Episode Guide
1 :01x01 - Good News, Bad News
Writer: Larry David, Jerry Seinfeld
Director: Art Wolff
Guest star: Pamela Brüll (Laura), Lee Garlington (Claire)
A girl that Jerry met on the road and likes calls and asks if she can stay in his apartment for the night while she's in town. George thinks that she's just using Jerry, and when she arrives, she asks to stay over even more. Then, after things begin to go well, Jerry learns that she's engaged.
2 :01x02 - The Stakeout
Writer: Jerry Seinfeld, Larry David
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Liz Sheridan (Helen Seinfeld), Lynn Clark (Vanessa), Maud Winchester (Pamela), William Fair (Roger), Ron Steelman (Artie Levine), Joe George (Uncle Mac), Ellen Gerstein (Carol), Janet Rotblatt (Woman), Philip Bruns (Morty Seinfeld)
Elaine invites Jerry to a party where he meets a woman that fascinates him. However, Jerry knows nothing about her, not even her name, so he and George stakeout the lobby of her office building in an attempt to 'run in' to her.
3 :01x03 - The Robbery
Writer: Matt Goldman
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: David Blackwood (Man #1), Anita Wise (Waitress), James F. Dean (Larry), Kimberley Kates (Diane), Bradford English (Cop), George C. Simms (Man #2)
When Jerry returns home from being out of town, he finds that his apartment had been broken into due to Kramer leaving the door open. Jerry decides that it's time to move and he and George go apartment hunting. But George begins to like the apartment Jerry finds and they fight over who gets it. Meanwhile, Elaine insists that she gets the apartment of whoever wins, and Kramer searches for the stolen items.
4 :01x04 - Male Unbonding
Writer: Larry David, Jerry Seinfeld
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Kevin Dunn (Joel), Anita Wise (Waitress), Frank Piazza (Customer), Kimberly LaMarque (Teller)
Kramer comes up with a plan for a make your own pizza restaurant chain and goes about finding investors. Jerry's former high school friend begins to constantly bother him and he tries to avoid him. Meanwhile, George has relationship problems with his latest girlfriend.
5 :01x05 - The Stock Tip
Writer: Jerry Seinfeld, Larry David
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Lynn Clark (Vanessa), Ted Davis (Dry Cleaner), Jill C. Klein (Waitress), Benjamin Lum (Stock Boy)
George and Jerry get a good stock tip and Jerry sells his stock before it takes a drop. George, however, keeps the stock and when it rebounds, he sells it for a lot of money. Jerry plans a weekend for him and Vanessa, but George warns him that trips like that are boring and known 'relationship killers'. While on the trip, Jerry is bored and hates the trip, just like George told him he would. Meanwhile, Elaine tries to deal with a cat problem.
6 :02x01 - The Ex-Girlfriend
Writer: Jerry Seinfeld, Larry David
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Tracy Kolis (Marlene), Karen Barcus (Receptionist)
After George dumps his girlfriend, Jerry starts dating her but she soon dumps him after going to one of his stand-up acts. Meanwhile, Kramer becomes obsessed over fresh fruit and Elaine becomes curious about a relationship with a guy in her building after he no longer says hello to her.
7 :02x02 - The Pony Remark
Writer: Larry David, Jerry Seinfeld
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Earl Boen (Eulogist), Liz Sheridan (Helen Seinfeld), Barney Martin (Morty Seinfeld), Len Lesser (Uncle Leo), Rozsika Halmos (Manya), David Fresco (Issac), Scott Stevens (Intern)
At a 50th anniversary party, Jerry makes a remark that immigrant children shouldn't ride ponies which offends the guest of honor. When she dies, Jerry has to decide whether to go to a championship softball game or attend her funeral. Meanwhile, Jerry bets Kramer that he can't renovate his apartment in a month, Elaine tries to find out what's going to happen to the elderly woman's apartment, and George begins to think he'll never have sex again.
8 :02x03 - The Jacket
Writer: Jerry Seinfeld, Larry David
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Lawrence Tierney (Alton Benes), Frantz Turner (Salesman), Suanne Spoke (Customer), Harry Hart-Browne (Manager)
Jerry buys a suede leather jacket with a pink-stripped lining, which he wears to a dinner date with George, Elaine, and her father. When it starts to snow outside, Jerry is forced to wear it inside out. Alton Benes doesn't want to be seen with Jerry wearing the lining on the outside, so Jerry wears it suede-out and Jerry's jacket is ruined by the precipitation. Meanwhile, George gets the theme song from Les Miserables stuck in his head, and Kramer helps his magician friend.
9 :02x04 - The Phone Message
Writer: Jerry Seinfeld, Larry David
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Tory Polone (Carol), Gretchen German (Donna)
George, thinking his girlfriend is ignoring him, leaves nasty messages on her answering machine. But George finds out that she's actually out of town and enlists Jerry's help to switch answering machine tapes. Meanwhile, Jerry and his girlfriend have a disagreement over a Dockers pants commercial.
10 :02x05 - The Apartment
Writer: Peter Mehlman
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: David Blackwood (Stan), Tony Plana (Manny), Glenn Shadix (Harold), Jeanine Jackson (Roxanne), Leslie Neale (Rita), Theresa Randle (Janice), Patricia Ayame Thomson (Susie), Melody Ryane (Joanne)
Jerry makes it so Elaine can have the apartment above him, but then tries to talk her out of it once he realizes the possible ramifications. Meanwhile, Kramer uses mousse in his hair, and George tries out the "wedding band" theory in order to meet women.
11 :02x06 - The Statue
Writer: Larry Charles
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Michael D. Conway (Ray), Nurit Koppel (Rava)
In a box of things left to Jerry by his grandfather, Jerry finds a statue that matches one that George's parents had until it was broken. Meanwhile, Elaine boyfriend agrees to clean Jerry's apartment, but after he's done, the statue had disappeared from the mantle where Jerry had left it. Elaine and Jerry find the statue at Elaine's boyfriend's house and have to get it back without risking Elaine's editing job but at the same time have to save George from his parents fury.
12 :02x07 - The Revenge
Writer: Larry David
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Marcus Smythe (Dan), Deck McKenzie (Bill), Fred Applegate (Levitan), John Capodice (Vic), Teri Austin (Ava), Patrika Darbo (Glenda), John Hillner (Greeny), Larry David (Newman (original broadcast)), Wayne Knight (Newman (syndicated airings))
George quits his job when he is forced to use the regular bathroom, but immediately regrets his decision. Jerry suggests that he return to work and go about the day like nothing happened. When Jerry's plan falls through, George plots revenge on his boss. Meanwhile, Newman tells Kramer he's going to jump off the building and Jerry thinks that the laundry mat owner stole 1500 dollar he had in his laundry bag so he plots his own revenge with the help of Kramer.
13 :02x08 - The Heart Attack
Writer: Larry Charles
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Stephen Tobolowsky (Tor), John Posey (Dr. Fein), John Fleck (Attendant), Jimmy Woodard (Driver), Pat Hazell (Man In Other Bed), Sharon McKnight (Nurse), Heather James (Waitress), Larry David (Screaming B-Movie Actor on TV)
George goes to the doctor after he had what he thought was a heart attack. The doctor tells him that he didn't have a heart attack, but needs to get his tonsils and adenoids removed. When the cost of the surgery is too much for George, Kramer suggests that he goes on a holistic healer, but the healer turns George's skin purple and he's forced to go to the hospital. Meanwhile, George's doctor catches Elaine's eye, but he's only interested in kissing her.
14 :02x09 - The Deal
Writer: Larry David
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Norman Brenner (Clerk), Siobhan Fallon (Tina)
When Jerry and Elaine come across "naked people" while watching TV, they discuss whether or not sex between friends can actually work. George thinks that it could never work, but he is amazed after Jerry and Elaine lay down rules for their new "friends with benefits" type relationship. However, their new relationship begins to fail when Elaine's birthday nears.
15 :02x10 - The Baby Shower
Writer: Larry Charles
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Christine Dunford (Leslie), Vic Polizos (Tabachnik), James Lashly (Assistant), Margaret Reed (Mary), George C. Simms (F.B.I. Man), Marla Frees (Stewardess), Don Perry (Passenger), Kate Mulligan (Party Guest), Audrey Frantz (Party Guest)
Elaine needs to use Jerry's apartment to host a baby shower so Jerry leaves town for a show. Before the shower, Kramer convinces Jerry to get an illegal cable hookup and the installation men come during the baby shower. Jerry's show gets cancelled so he comes home early, with George, whose ex-girlfriend is at the baby shower. Jerry has to confront a woman that he said he'd call but never did.
16 :02x11 - The Chinese Restaurant
Writer: Jerry Seinfeld
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: James Hong (Bruce), David Tress (Mr. Cohen), Judy Kain (Lorraine), Kate Benton (Woman On Phone), Michael Mitz (Phone Guy), Kendall McCarthy (Man)
Elaine, George, and Jerry stop at a Chinese restaurant to have a quick dinner before seeing Plan 9 From Outer Space, a sci-fi spoof. However, the wait is longer than expected.
17 :02x12 - The Busboy
Writer: Jerry Seinfeld
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: David Labiosa (Antonio), Doug Ballard (Eddie), John Del Regno (Manager)
George accidentally gets a busboy fired. Feeling bad, he tries to make up for the incident but ends up losing the busboy's cat in the process. Meanwhile, Elaine has a houseguest that won't leave.
18 :03x01 - The Note
Writer: Larry David
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Liz Georges (Pam), Ralph Bruneau (Lloyd), Terri Hanauer (Julianna), Jeff Lester (Raymond), Flo Di Re (Receptionist), Paul Rogers (Man in Waiting Room), Dale Raoul (Dental Patient), Joshua Liebling (Billy)
In order to get their insurance companies to cover physical therapy, Jerry gets his friend Roy, a dentist, to write them fake doctor's notes. George becomes uncomfortable when he gets a male physical therapist and during one of the massages, George said "it" might have moved. Meanwhile, Kramer claims that he saw Joe DiMaggio in Dinky Doughnuts and Roy gets investigated for insurance fraud.
19 :03x02 - The Truth
Writer: Elaine Pope
Director: David Steinberg
Guest star: Valerie Mahaffey (Patrice), Siobhan Fallon (Tina)
To help Jerry with his taxes, George dates a woman from the IRS and gives her Jerry's tax papers. But George breaks up with her and tells her the real reason he dated her, sending her into a deep depression. George tries to get the papers back but finds out she's been institutionalized. Meanwhile, Kramer dates Elaine's roommate and they become uncomfortable around each other after Kramer inadvertently sees Elaine naked.
20 :03x03 - The Pen
Writer: Larry David
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Barney Martin (Morty), Liz Sheridan (Helen), Sandy Baron (Jack Klompus), Annie Korzen (Doris Klompus), Ann Morgan Guilbert (Evelyn), Len Lesser (Uncle Leo), Magda Harout (Stella), Roger Nolan (The Chiropractor), Tucker Smallwood (The Photographer), Larry David (Shouting Man in Audience)
Jerry and Elaine travel to Florida to visit Jerry's parents. Elaine soon regrets going with Jerry when she can't sleep due to the uncomfortable sofa bed and climate control. Klompus, one of Jerry's parents friends, offers Jerry an astronaut pen that writes upside down and keeps offering until Jerry reluctantly accepts.
21 :03x04 - The Dog
Writer: Larry David
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Joseph Maher (Gavin Palone), Tom Williams (Farfel), Marvin Wright-Bey (Attendant #1), Kelly Wellman (Attendant #2)
Jerry dog sits for a man he met on an airplane after the man has to go to the hospital and Jerry can't leave the apartment. Without Jerry, George and Elaine are forced to spend time alone and realize that it's not the same without Jerry. Meanwhile, Kramer tries to break up with his girlfriend.
22 :03x05 - The Library
Writer: Larry Charles
Director: Joshua White
Guest star: Marie Barrientos (Receptionist), Philip Baker Hall (Lt. Bookman), Ashley Gardner (Marion), Harris Shore (Mr. Lippman), Cynthia Szigeti (Sherry), Biff Yeager (Heyman), Neal Lerner (The "Shusher")
Jerry gets a call from the library that he has a book that is 25 years overdue. Jerry thinks back to his childhood and remembers that George borrowed it and never gave it back. Meanwhile, George thinks a homeless man he saw was his high school gym teacher and Elaine thinks she'll lose her job after her boss doesn't like her ideas.
23 :03x06 - The Parking Garage
Writer: Larry David
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: David Dunard (Security Guard), Cynthia Ettinger (Michelle), Gregg Daniel (Man in Corvette), Carlyle King (Mother), Adam Wylie (Kid), Joe Farago (Man with Woman), Ron Evans (Bodybuilder), Tucker Smallwood (Man in Mercedes)
Kramer loses his car in a parking garage so Jerry, George and Elaine spend the afternoon looking for it. While searching, Jerry has to use the bathroom but can't find one so he urinates in the corner. A cop sees him and arrests him. Meanwhile, Elaine's fish die from neglect and Kramer, along with his car, forgets where he left his giant air conditioner.
24 :03x07 - The Cafe
Writer: Tom Leopold
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Brian George (Babu Bhatt), Dawn Arnemann (Monica)
Jerry befriends a restaurant owner and tries to help him get more business. Elaine helps George cheat on an IQ test by taking it for him but does poorly on the test. Kramer uses his mother's ex-boyfriend's jacket to attract women until the former owner comes looking for it.
25 :03x08 - The Tape
Writer: Don McEnery, Larry David, Bob Shaw
Director: David Steinberg
Guest star: John Apicella (Repairman), Ping Wu (Ping), Norman Brenner (Beder)
Someone leaves dirty messages on Jerry's tape recorder. Finally Elaine confesses to George that she was the one that left the message, angering George. Meanwhile, George hears about a new cure for baldness and Kramer tries to find the jacket.
26 :03x09 - The Nose Job
Writer: Peter Mehlman
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Susan Diol (Audrey), Roy Brocksmith (Landlord), Tawny Kitaen (Isabel), Joseph V. Perry (Newsstand Owner), David Blackwood (Interviewer)
George starts dating a woman with a large nose and when Kramer is honest to her about the size of her nose, she gets a nose job. Meanwhile, Jerry has to decide if he wants to stay in a relationship where the only good thing is the sex and Elaine helps Kramer get the jacket back.
27 :03x10 - The Stranded
Writer: Matt Goldman, Larry David, Jerry Seinfeld
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Susan Diol (Audrey), Michael Chiklis (Steve), Teri Austin (Ava), Bobbi Jo Lathan (Patti), Gwen Shepherd (Cashier), Dwayne Kennedy (Frank), Marcia Firesten (Jenny), Michael Milhoan (Security Guard), John Putch (Roy), Melissa Weil (Gwen), Ellen Ratner (Ellen), Frank Piazza (Cop)
Jerry and Elaine come up with signals so they can help one another get out of bad situations at a party. At the party, George strands Jerry and Elaine at the party when he leaves with a woman, forcing them to call Kramer for a ride. Meanwhile, George shoplifts from a drug store and gets arrested.
28 :03x11 - The Alternate Side
Writer: Larry David, Bill Masters
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Jay Brooks (Sid), Janet Zarish (Rental Car Agent), Edward Penn (Owen March), Jeff Barton (Paramedic), Larry David (Man Who Stole Jerry's Car)
Jerry's car is stolen and has trouble getting a rental car but is able to contact the thief by calling his carphone. George gets a job moving cars which slows the normal traffic flow and Elaine tries to break up with her 66 year-old boyfriend. Also, Kramer gets a part in a Woody Allen film and gets to say the line "these pretzels are making me thirsty."
29 :03x12 - The Red Dot
Writer: Larry David
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: David Naughton (Dick), Bridget Sienna (Evie), Richard Fancy (Mr. Lippman), Rachel Davies (Saleswoman)
Elaine helps George get a job so he buys her a sweater to say thanks. The only problem with the sweater is a small red dot on the fabric and after seeing it, Elaine gives it back to George. Jerry unknowingly gives a recovering alcoholic a drink
30 :03x13 - The Subway
Writer: Larry Charles
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Rhoda Gemignani (Woman with Elaine), Ernie Sabella (Naked Man), Barbara Stock (Scam Woman), Mark Boone Junior (Patrom), Barry Vigon (Player #1), Daryl Keith Roach (Violinist/Cop), Chet Nelson (Kid), Joe Restivo (Player #2), Chris Latta (Thug (as Christopher Collins))
On the subway, George, Elaine, Jerry, and Kramer each have unusual experiences. George meets a woman who causes him to miss his stop and his job interview. Kramer overhears a tip on a racehorse while going to pay his traffic fines. Elaine's train stops, and she worries she'll be late for a lesbian wedding that she's the best man for. Jerry falls asleep and wakes up next to a large, naked man.
31 :03x14 - The Pez Dispenser
Writer: Larry David
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Elizabeth Morehead (Noel), Fred Sanders (John), Bill Applebaum (D'Giff), Allen Bloomfield (Polar Bear), Chris Barnes (Richie), Steve Kehela (Intervenor), Kate Benton (Roberta)
Jerry makes Elaine laugh at a pez dispenser at a piano recital. The recital was held by George's girlfriend, and she becomes angry at him for the disruptions. Kramer suggests to George that he should break up with his girlfriend before she does. Meanwhile, Kramer comes up with a new cologne fragrance that smells like the beach and the pez dispenser works wonders at a drug intervention.
32 :03x15 - The Suicide
Writer: Tom Leopold
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Gina Gallego (Gina), Mimi Lieber (Rula), C. E. Grimes (Martin), Howard Schecter (Doctor), Aimee Aro (Faithy), Peggy Lane O'Rourke (Nurse), Wayne Knight (Newman)
Elaine has to fast for an upcoming X-ray appointment but breaks the fast for a piece of coffee cake. Jerry is hit on by Gina, a woman whose husband is in a coma. A psychic warns George not to go to the Cayman Islands so Kramer goes in his place.
33 :03x16 - The Fix-Up
Writer: Elaine Pope, Larry Charles
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Maggie Wheeler (Cynthia)
Together, Elaine and Jerry try to fix up George with Elaine's friend. Prior to their blind date, Kramer hands out condoms he was given and Jerry and Elaine agree to keep each other updated about how George's date went. However, Jerry and Elaine don't tell each other everything and Kramer's blue condoms didn't work as well as they should have.
34 :03x17 - The Boyfriend (1)
Writer: Larry David, Larry Levin
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Keith Hernandez (Himself), Rae Allen (Mrs. Lenore Sokol), Richard Assad (Cabby), Wayne Knight (Newman)
Jerry gets to meet Keith Hernandez, a New York Mets player and tries to make a good first impression. Later, Keith goes on a date with Elaine, missing his plans with Jerry. Meanwhile, George has to talk the unemployment agency into extending his unemployment checks.
35 :03x18 - The Boyfriend (2)
Writer: Larry Levin, Larry David
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Keith Hernandez (Himself), Rae Allen (Mrs. Lenore Sokol), Richard Assad (Cabby), Wayne Knight (Newman)
George continues to convince the unemployment office that he's getting a job. Jerry and Kramer go to visit a former neighbor and her baby. Elaine breaks up with Keith after discovering he smokes and Jerry breaks up with him as well. Also, George tries to make good on his plans to sleep with a really tall woman.
36 :03x19 - The Limo
Writer: Larry Charles
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Peter Krause (Tim), Suzanne Snyder (Eva), Jeremy Roberts (Chauffeur), Jodi Baskerville (Herself), I. M. Hobson (Businessman), Harley Venton (Dan), Adam Leslie (Man at Protest), Norman Brenner (Man at Airport), Aaron Kanarek (Protester #1), Ray Glanzmann (Protester #2)
George and Jerry take a limo that was supposed to be for a passenger who never made it on the plane and invite Elaine and Kramer to join them. However, things take a turn for the worst when they have to pretend they're the real people, who turn out to be White Supremacists.
37 :03x20 - The Good Samaritan
Writer: Peter Mehlman
Director: Jason Alexander
Guest star: Melinda McGraw (Angela), Ann Talman (Robin), Joseph Malone (Michael), Helen Slater (Becky Gelke)
When Jerry confronts a woman that he saw hit-and-run, he ends up dating her, causing the victim to think Jerry did it. Meanwhile, George sleeps with Elaine's friend and Kramer has bad reactions to Marty Hart's voice.
38 :03x21 - The Letter
Writer: Larry David
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Richard Fancy (Mr. Lippman), Catherine Keener (Nina West), Richard Venture (Leonard West), Elliott Reid (Mr. Armstrong), Justine Johnston (Mrs. Armstrong), Shashawnee Hall (Usher)
Kramer poses for Jerry's girlfriend and his portrait becomes a masterpiece in the eyes of an elderly couple. Later, Jerry's girlfriend writes him a letter but Jerry hears the same lines from the letter on TV. Elaine wears an Orioles hat to a Yankee game and is banished from the stadium.
39 :03x22 - The Parking Space
Writer: Greg Daniels, Larry David
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Wayne Knight (Newman), Lee Arenberg (Mike Moffit), Jay Brooks (Sid), Maryedith Burrell (Maryedith), Shannon Cochran (Sheila), Zachary Charles (Angry Man), Michael A. Costanza (Truck Driver), Mik Scriba (Cop #1), Stan Sellers (Cop #2), John Christian Graas (Matthew), Peggy Lane O'Rourke (Bystander #1), Steven Marcus Gibbs (Bystander #2)
Elaine borrows Jerry's car and tries to explain away the strange sound it makes after she uses it with a crazy story. Mike, one of Kramer's friends, thinks Jerry is a phony and George gets into a fight with Mike over a parking space.
40 :03x23 - The Keys
Writer: Larry Charles
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Wayne Knight (Newman), Candice Bergen (Herself (as Murphy Brown)), Nina Tremblay (Jerry's Girlfriend), Eric Allan Kramer (Biker), Ricky Dean Logan (Hippie #1), Sharon Barr (Trucker), Heather James (Waitress), Carissa Channing (Gucci), Maud Winchester (Hippie #2)
Jerry takes back Kramer's key to his apartment and gives it to Elaine instead. When Jerry needs his spare key to get into his apartment, he enlists the help of George to get it out of Elaine's apartment and they discover the script she had written. Kramer, feeling like he can come out of Jerry's shadow, lands a role on Murphy Brown and travels to California for the part.
41 :04x01 - The Trip (1)
Writer: Larry Charles
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Elmarie Wendel (Helene), Peter Murnik (Lt. Martel), Debi A. Monahan (Chelsea), Ricky Dean Logan (The Freak), Vaughn Armstrong (Lt. Coleman), Keith Morrison (Himself (as Newscaster)), Manfred Melcher (Officer), Christopher Michael Moore (Studio Guard), Dyana Ortelli (Chambermaid (Lupe)), Michael Gerard (Receptionist), Fred Savage (Himself), George Wendt (Himself), Corbin Bernsen (Himself)
Jerry and George go to L.A. where Jerry is going to be on the Tonight Show. While in L.A., they try to find Kramer who is trying to get his script read. Jerry loses paper with his jokes written on them and his act doesn't go well after George pesters the guests. Kramer mistakenly becomes the number one suspect in a serial killing when his script is found at the crime scene.
42 :04x02 - The Trip (2)
Writer: Larry Charles
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Clint Howard (Tobias Lehigh Nagy), Peter Parros (Officer #2), Elmarie Wendel (Helene), Peter Murnik (Lt. Martel), Marty Rackham (Officer #1), Vaughn Armstrong (Lt. Coleman), Steve Greenstein (Man), Kerry Michaels (Woman), Keith Morrison (Himself (as Newscaster)), Peggy Lane O'Rourke (Reporter #1), Deck McKenzie (Reporter #2), Steve Dougherty (Prison Guard)
Jerry and George try to tell the police that Kramer isn't the Smog Strangler and Kramer is oblivious to the manhunt launched to find him. Jerry and George get a ride in a police car and accidentally let a criminal escape when they exit the car. The police arrest Kramer and take him in for questioning.
43 :04x03 - The Pitch
Writer: Larry David
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Stephen McHattie (Dr. Reston), Heidi Swedberg (Susan Ross), Peter Crombie ("Crazy" Joe Divola), Bob Balaban (Russell Dalrymple), Wayne Knight (Newman), Kevin Page (Stu), Peter Blood (Jay), Julie Blum (Receptionist), Steve Skrovan (Tommy), Ron Ross (Homeless Man)
Jerry is asked by NBC to pitch an idea for a TV show. With George's help, he and Jerry come up with idea of "nothing" for a TV show. However, George's confidence as a screenwriter is lowered after his mother tells him he isn't a screenwriter. Also, George starts dating Susan, an NBC executive, but their relationship is strained when Kramer throws up on her.
44 :04x04 - The Ticket
Writer: Larry David
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Al Fann (Judge), Stephen McHattie (Psychiatrist (Dr. Reston)), Wayne Knight (Newman), Bob Balaban (Russel), Heidi Swedberg (Susan), Kevin Page (Stu), Len Lesser (Uncle Leo), Steve Eastin (Cop #1), David Graf (Cop #2)
Kramer's side effects from the accident begin to take their toll on him. Jerry throws away an old watch his parents gave him and Uncle Leo spots the watch in the trash. Newman convinces Kramer to be his alibi at his trial and Jerry and George get a green light for their pilot.
45 :04x05 - The Wallet (1)
Writer: Larry David
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Stephen McHattie (Dr. Reston), David Sage (Dr. Dembrow), Susan Ilene Johnson (Nurse), Denise Dowse (Receptionist), Brian Leckner (Attendant), Liz Sheridan (Helen Seinfeld), Barney Martin (Morty Seinfeld), Len Lesser (Uncle Leo), Heidi Swedberg (Susan)
Morty, Jerry's father, comes to New York to see a back specialist and asks Jerry about the watch he gave him. At NBC, George tries negotiate their deal, but ends up doing more bad than good. Meanwhile, Elaine returns from Europe and breaks up with her boyfriend.
46 :04x06 - The Watch (2)
Writer: Larry David
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Liz Sheridan (Helen Seinfeld), Barney Martin (Morty Seinfeld), Len Lesser (Uncle Leo), Bob Balaban (Russell Dalrimple), Heidi Swedberg (Susan), Peter Crombie ("Crazy" Joe Davola), Stephen McHattie (Dr. Reston), Jessica Lundy (Naomi), Christopher Carroll (Maitre d'), Lewis Dauber (Doorman), Mimi Craven (Cynthia)
At dinner with his parents and Uncle Leo, Jerry has to defend throwing the watch away after Uncle Leo brings up that he saw it in the trash. Elaine uses Kramer to pose as her boyfriend in order to break up with her psychiatrist boyfriend and George tries to get their NBC contract back.
47 :04x07 - The Bubble Boy
Writer: Larry David, Larry Charles
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Heidi Swedberg (Susan), Jessica Lundy (Naomi), Brian Doyle-Murray (Mel), Carol Mansell (Mother), O-Lan Jones (Waitress), Jon Hayman (Donald (Voice and Arm Only)), George Gerdes (Man #1), Tony Papenfuss (Man #2)
Elaine, Jerry, George and Susan go to a cabin owned by Susan's father. They all take a side trip with Jerry to visit a sick fan who is a "bubble boy" in order to avoid germs. They all play trivial pursuit with the boy and George fights with him over an answer. Meanwhile, Kramer and Naomi go to the cabin, uninvited.
48 :04x08 - The Cheever Letters
Writer: Elaine Pope, Larry David, Tom Leopold
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Warren Frost (Mr. Ross), Lisa Malkiewicz (Sandra), Grace Zabriskie (Mrs. Ross), David Blackwood (Doorman), Heidi Swedberg (Susan), Miguel Perez (Luis), Vanessa Marquez (Receptionist), Timothy Omundson (Ricky Ross), Patricia Lee Willson (Sara Ross)
George and Jerry begin to write the script for their pilot episode. George and Susan talk to Susan's father about the cabin fire and discover his secret while looking through papers recovered from the cabin. Meanwhile, Kramer goes to the Cuban Embassy in search of Cuban cigars.
49 :04x09 - The Opera
Writer: Larry Charles
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Jason Wingreen (Man #2), Peter Crombie (Joe Divola), Heidi Swedberg (Susan), Tom Celli (Man #1), Glen Chin (Man #3), Ross Evans (Mr. Reichman), Harriett S. Miller (Mrs. Reichman), Bill Saluga (Usher)
Kramer gets everyone tickets to the opera. But George scalps his tickets after Susan can't go. Elaine breaks up with "Crazy" Joe, and Jerry and Elaine go to the opera together, each not knowing the other's past with "Crazy" Joe.
50 :04x10 - The Virgin
Writer: Peter Mehlman
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Jane Leeves (Marla), Heidi Swedberg (Susan), Kevin Page (Stu), Peter Blood (Jay), Anne Twomey (Rita), Ping Wu (Ping), Leah Lail (Stacy), Derya Ruggles (Woman in Bar), Dayna Winston (Carol), Julie Blum (Receptionist)
George and Jerry continue working on their script and try to find a good idea to base the series off of. George considers dumping Susan so he can use his new profession to attract women. Jerry finds out that a girl he started dating is still a virgin and Elaine takes it upon herself to educate her about men.
51 :04x11 - The Contest
Writer: Larry David
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Estelle Harris (Mrs. Costanza), Jane Leeves (Marla), Ilana Levine (Joyce), Rachel Sweet (Shelly), Andrea Parker (Nurse)
Jerry challenges George to see who can go the longest without masturbation. Kramer and Elaine find out about the bet and decide they want in on it too. Jerry's girlfriend, however, is disgusted by the premise of the contest.
52 :04x12 - The Airport
Writer: Larry David
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Jack Graiman (Cop), Jennifer Campbell (Tia), Scott Burkholder (Prisoner), Jim J. Bullock (Attendant #1), Karen Denise Williams (Attendant #2), Allan Wasserman (Grossbard), Lenny Rose (Passenger #1), Annie Korzen (Passenger #2), Deck McKenzie (Security Guard), Maggie Egan (Ticket Clerk), Mark Christopher Lawrence (Skycap), William Evan Masters (Driver), Larry David (Man Ordering Leftover Kosher Meal)
After their original flight gets cancelled, Jerry and Elaine catch another plane, but Elaine gets put in coach while Jerry is in first class seated next to a model. Elaine misses the meal service and quickly gets tired of the crowded coach section. Meanwhile, George and Kramer drive to JFK airport to pick up Elaine and Jerry, then, after seeing that their flight was cancelled, drive to La Guardia where their flight was redirected. At the airport, George runs into a man that owes him money.
53 :04x13 - The Pick
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Jennifer Campbell (Tia), Heidi Swedberg (Susan), Wayne Knight (Newman), Nicholas Hormann (Calvin Klein), Gina Hecht (Dana Foley), Tony Carlin (Fred), François Giroday (Male Executive), Blaire Baron (Female Executive), Steve Schubert (Man in Office)
Jerry goes on a date with the model from the plane but gets dumped after the model thinks she sees Jerry picking his nose in the car next to her. Elaine sends out a Christmas card that shows a bit too much of her. George tries to get back together with Susan but immediately regrets it and Kramer heads to Calvin Klein to complain about "The Ocean", a new fragrance Kramer thinks they stole from him.
54 :04x14 - The Movie
Writer: Bill Masters, Jon Hayman, Steve Skrovan
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Barry Diamond (Buckles), Perry Anzilotti (Usher), Tom LaGrua (Kernis), Eric Poppick (Maurice), Cathy Lind Hayes (Woman Behind Elaine), Allan Kolman (Cab Driver), Molly Cleator (Cashier), Christie Mellor (Concessionaire), Jeff Norman (Man In Line), Paul Eisenhauer (Man In Theatre), Montrose Hagins (Woman In Theatre)
George, Elaine, Kramer and Jerry plan on seeing a movie together. However, George gets in the wrong line for tickets and the four have to go to another theater to see the movie. There, through a series of errors, George ends up in the wrong movie, Jerry and Elaine watch a different movie because they were late, and Kramer, sees the movie they had planned on seeing all along.
55 :04x15 - The Visa
Writer: Peter Mehlman
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Brian George (Babu Bhatt), Maggie Han (Cheryl), Ping Wu (Ping), John Hamelin (Babu's Brother), Gerry Bednob (Babu's Friend)
George meets a female Chinese lawyer who thinks that he's funny and tells Jerry not to be funny around her so he can still appear funny to her. However, when Jerry starts talking dark and twisted, the lawyer begins to fall for Jerry's personality instead. Meanwhile, Kramer accidentally punches Mickey Mantle at a baseball fantasy camp and a mail mix-up with Jerry leads to Babu being arrested for not having a renewed visa.
56 :04x16 - The Shoes
Writer: Jerry Seinfeld, Larry David
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Bob Balaban (Russell), Gina Hecht (Dana), Anita Barone (Gail), Denise Richards (Molly), Michael Ornstein (Waiter)
George and Jerry try to keep their TV series alive but run into problems when they can't figure out what to do with the Elaine character. Then George is caught staring at one of the executive's daughter's cleavage, threatening the entire series. Meanwhile, Jerry runs into an old girlfriend who wants and talks about Elaine's shoes.
57 :04x17 - The Outing
Writer: Larry Charles
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: David Gibbs (Man #2), Paula Marshall (Sharon Leonard), Kari Coleman (Allison), Liz Sheridan (Helen Seinfeld), Barney Martin (Morty Seinfeld), Estelle Harris (Estelle Castanza), Anthony Mangano (Sailor), Ben Reed (Male Nurse), Lawrence Mandley (Manager), Charley Garrett (Man #1), Deck McKenzie (Scott)
Jerry and George have to prove that they're straight after a college reporter misinterprets a joke that Jerry and George were trying to play on her. Things get worse when the story is picked up by the New York Post.
58 :04x18 - The Old Man
Writer: Bruce Kirschbaum
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Wayne Knight (Newman), Bill Erwin (Sid Fields), Tobin Bell (Ron), Robert Donley (Ben Cantwell), Lanai Chapman (Housekeeper), Victoria Dillard (Agency Rep), Jerry Hauck (Tim Fields), Edie McClurg (Mrs. Oliver)
George, Elaine, and Jerry volunteer at a retirement home. Elaine is grossed out by her resident; Jerry is assigned to a mean old man, who he loses when he takes him to get his dentures repaired. Meanwhile, Kramer and Newman try to make money by selling old records to a used record store.
59 :04x19 - The Implant
Writer: Peter Mehlman
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Teri Hatcher (Sidra), Megan Mullally (Betsy), Carol Rosenthal (Airline Clerk #1), Donald Bishop (Dr. Allenwood), Tony Amendola (Sal Bass), Kieran Mulroney (Timmy), Peggy Stewart (Aunt May), Bruce Morrow (Father Jessup), Susan Beaubian (Airline Clerk #2)
Jerry breaks up with his girlfriend after Elaine convinces him she has breast implants. At the sauna, Elaine discovers that they are real after she pretends to fall. George goes to Detroit for a funeral with his girlfriend and tries to get a copy of the death certificate in order to get a discounted plane ticket.
60 :04x20 - The Junior Mint
Writer: Andy Robin
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Sherman Howard (Roy), Susan Walters (Dolares), Victor Raider-Wexler (Doctor)
Jerry gets a date with a woman but has trouble remembering her name. He discovers that it rhymes with a female body part and with the help of George; they come up with Mulva, Bovary, and Arethra as possible names. Elaine visits an old friend who is in the hospital for an operation and lets Kramer and Jerry watch the operation. While watching, Jerry and Kramer cause a junior mint mishap.
61 :04x21 - The Smelly Car
Writer: Peter Mehlman, Larry David
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Nick Bakay (Carl), Heidi Swedberg (Susan), Michael Des Barres (Restaurateur), Nick Backay (Carl), Kari Coleman (Allison), Taylor Negron (Hairdresser), Courtney Gains (Clerk), Raf Mauro (Car Washer), Vieka Davis (Mona), Robert Noble (Salesman), Patricia Place (Wife), Walt Beaver (Husband)
A valet leaves a strong odor in Jerry's car, and when Jerry can't get rid of it, he tries to sell the car. When it won't sell, Jerry leaves the car, with the keys in the ignition, for someone to take. George spots Susan holding hands with another woman and Kramer attempts to change the Susan's friend's orientation.
62 :04x22 - The Handicap Spot
Writer: Larry David
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: David Blackwood (Security Guard), Estelle Harris (Estelle Costanza), Jerry Stiller (Frank Costanza), Kathy Kinney (Angry Woman), Richard Portnow (Ray), Rick Overton (The Drake), Nancy Lenehan (Volunteer), Elizabeth Dennehy (Allison), Fritzi Burr (Maj-Jongg Lady #1), Norma Janis (Maj-Jongg Lady #2), Ina Parker (Maj-Jongg Lady #3), Martin Braverman (Cop), Eric Fleeks (Kicker), Donna Evans (Lula)
George parks his father's car in a handicap parking spot while he tries to find an engagement present for "the Drake." A handicap woman gets injured because of George's parking, so feeling guilty, George and Kramer visit her in the hospital. Kramer falls in love with the woman and buys her a new wheelchair, which does more harm than good. George's father gets arrested for parking in the handicap space and George becomes his butler to make up for it.
63 :04x23 - The Pilot (1)
Writer: Larry David
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Jeremy Piven (Michael Barth (TV George)), Richard Gant (Fred), Kevin Page (Stu), Peter Blood (Jay), Bob Balaban (Russell), Peter Crombie ("Crazy" Joe), Mariska Hargitay (Melissa Shannon), Anne Twomey (Rita), Gina Hecht (Dana Foley), Larry Hankin (Tom Pepper (TV Kramer)), Laura Waterbury (Casting Director), Elena Wohl (Sandi Robbins (TV Elaine)), Bruce Jarchow (Doctor), Al Ruscio (Manager), Roger Rose (Mark), Samantha Dorman (Waitress), Erick Avari (Cabbie), Bob Shaw (Paul), Stephen Burrows (David), Lanai Chapman (Housekeeper), Chris Penn (Stage Hand)
Jerry and George finally get the green light to shoot their pilot episode. During filming, George becomes preoccupied with a white spot on his lip and then suspects that Kramer's character is stealing boxes of raisins from the set. Meanwhile, Elaine has problems with a coffee shop that only hires 'well-endowed' waitresses.
64 :04x24 - The Pilot (2)
Writer: Larry David
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Jeremy Piven (Michael Barth (TV George)), Richard Gant (Fred), Kevin Page (Stu), Peter Blood (Jay), Jane Leeves (Marla), Bob Balaban (Russell), Peter Crombie ("Crazy" Joe), Heidi Swedberg (Susan), Barney Martin (Morty Seinfeld), Liz Sheridan (Helen Seinfeld), Wayne Knight (Newman), Anne Twomey (Rita), Larry Hankin (Tom Pepper (TV Kramer)), Elena Wohl (Sandi Robbins (TV Elaine)), Al Ruscio (Manager), Brian Bradley (Butler), Bob Shaw (Paul), Deborah Swisher (1st AD), Jeff Oetjen (Wilton), Pat Hazell (Himself), Kari Coleman (Allison), Bill Erwin (Sid), Lanai Chapman (Housekeeper), Rick Overton (The Drake), Elizabeth Dennehy (Allison), Maggie Han (Cheryl), Ping Wu (Ping), Brian Doyle-Murray (Mel), Carol Mansell (Mother), Jon Hayman (Donald), Jennifer Campbell (Tia), Nicholas Hormann (Calvin), Teri Hatcher (Sidra), Tony Amendola (Sal Bass), Chris Penn (Stage Hand), Larry David (Man on Raft)
George confronts TV Kramer about the raisins and has to get a biopsy done on the white spot on his lip. Elaine starts an investigation on the coffee shop owner. Everyone, including Jerry's relatives, watch the pilot episode but when the current NBC president disappears, the new president may pull the plug on the series.
65 :05x01 - The Mango
Writer: Buck Dancer, Lawrence H. Levy
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Lisa Edelstein (Karen), Leonard Termo (Joe), Veralyn Jones (Renee)
When Kramer gets banned from buying fruit from his usual fruit stand, he gets Jerry to buy the fruit for him. George loses confidence in bed after he thinks he's impotent. Jerry learns that Elaine faked orgasms when they were together and begs for another chance.
66 :05x02 - The Puffy Shirt
Writer: Larry David
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: David Brisbin (Client), Estelle Harris (Estelle Costanza), Jerry Stiller (Frank Costanza), Wendel Meldrum (Leslie), Bryant Gumbel (Himself), Deborah May (Elsa), Michael Mitz (Photographer), Kim Gillingham (Assistant), Terence Riggins (Stage Manager), Ron Ross (Homeless Man)
Kramer starts dating a 'low talker' and at dinner with the two, Jerry says 'yes' to a question she asks him, even though he couldn't hear it. Jerry soon learns that she asked him to wear a new shirt style, the puffy shirt, during his act on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno. Meanwhile, George moves back in with his parents and gets a job as a hand model.
67 :05x03 - The Glasses
Writer: Tom Gammill, Max Pross
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Len Lesser (Uncle Leo), Timothy Stack (Dwayne), Anna Gunn (Amy), Tom Towles (Tough Guy), Rance Howard (Blind Man), Michael Saad (Doctor)
George's glasses are stolen, so he goes to one of Kramer's friends to try to get a discount on a new pair. Elaine gets bitten by a dog and develops a fear of dogs afterwards. Without his glasses on, George thinks she saw Jerry's girlfriend kiss one of Jerry's cousins.
68 :05x04 - The Sniffing Accountant
Writer: Jerry Seinfeld, Larry David
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Wayne Knight (Newman), Estelle Harris (Estelle Costanza), Jerry Stiller (Frank Costanza), John Kapelos (Barry), Richard Fancy (Lippman), Marty Rackham (Jake), Patrick Cronin (Farkus), Deck McKenzie (Mitch), Christa Miller Lawrence (Ellen), Ralph Louis Harris (Ralph), Maria Stanton (Woman in Diner)
Frank Costanza gets George an interview for a bra salesman position. Elaine's boyfriend adds exclamation marks to everything he writes, and Elaine gets offended when he doesn't use an exclamation mark in a note he wrote her. Everyone suspects that Jerry's accountant is using drugs and Jerry, Newman and Kramer try to find out if the suspicion is true or not.
69 :05x05 - The Bris
Writer: Larry Charles
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Jeannie Elias (Myra), Tom Alan Robbins (Stan), Frank Noon (Patient), Debra Mooney (Mrs. Sweedler), John Gegenhuber (Resident), Alfred Dennis (Man), Tia Riebling (Woman), Charles Levin (Mohel)
George, Jerry, and Elaine go to the hospital to witness a birth. Jerry and Elaine agree to be the baby's Godparents and plan the Jewish ceremonies for the baby. Kramer thinks he saw a "pig man" at the hospital and sets out to prove that the man really exists.
70 :05x06 - The Lip Reader
Writer: Carol Leifer
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Christopher Darga (Driver), Linda Kash (Gwen), Jerry Sroka (Todd), Marlee Matlin (Laura), Veralyn Jones (Renee), Dylan Haggerty (Young Man), Bret Anthony (Teen)
Kramer gets a job as a ball boy for the US Open and brings Jerry to the event with him. Jerry falls for one of the players and asks her on a date. However, the woman is deaf, but can read lips, and George and Jerry use her to eavesdrop on George's ex-girlfriend.
71 :05x07 - The Non-Fat Yogurt
Writer: Larry David
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Wayne Knight (Newman), Estelle Harris (Estelle Costanza), Jerry Stiller (Frank Costanza), Rudolph Giuliani (Himself), Maryedith Burrell (Maryedith), Peter Keleghan (Lloyd Braun), John Christian Graas (Matthew), Hugh A. Rose (Doctor), Lisa Hoyle (Cheryl), Jed Mills (Joel), John Gabriel (Newscaster), Darrell Kunitomi (Lab Tech)
Kramer invests in a non-fat yogurt shop, but Jerry and Elaine begin to think it was a bad investment when everyone that eats the yogurt gains weight. When Kramer starts dating a lab technician, Jerry and Elaine have her test the yogurt to see why people are gaining weight. Meanwhile, Elaine dates a man running for mayor, and Jerry curses in front of a boy who starts swearing afterwards.
72 :05x08 - The Barber
Writer: Andy Robin
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Michael Fairman (Mr. Pensky), Wayne Knight (Newman), Antony Ponzini (Enzo), David Ciminello (Gino), Jack Shearer (Mr. Tuttle), Kenny Myles (Mike), Peggy Maltby (Clarisse), David Richardson (Customer)
Jerry gets a bad hair cut but can't make himself tell his barber about it or find a new one. Jerry decides to get a haircut, in secret, by his barber's assistant in his apartment. When the barber suspects that Jerry is getting his hair cut by someone else, he sends Newman to get hair samples. Meanwhile, George interviews for a job, then goes to the office and acts like an employee while the boss is on vacation; Elaine brings Kramer to a singles auction.
73 :05x09 - The Masseuse
Writer: Peter Mehlman
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Jennifer Coolidge (Jody), Lisa Pescia (Lisa), Lisa Edelstein (Karen), Anthony Cistaro (Joel Rifkin), Hiram Kasten (Michael), John Bishop (Ticket Man)
Elaine finds the perfect man, except the fact that his name is the same as a famous serial killer. Later, Elaine convinces him to change his name and they try to think up possible names. Meanwhile, Jerry dates a masseuse who won't give him a massage and George tries his hardest to get Jerry's girlfriend to like him.
74 :05x10 - The Cigar Store Indian
Writer: Tom Gammill, Max Pross
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Ralph Manza (Gepetto), Kimberly Norris (Winona), Sam Lloyd (Ricky), Carissa Channing (Sylvia), Al Roker (Himself), Veralyn Jones (Renee), Lisa Pescia (Joanne), Benjamin Lum (Mailman), Irvin Mosley, Jr. (Spike)
Jerry offends a female Native American when he gives Elaine a "Cigar Store Indian" as a gift. George spills coffee on his parents' coffee table, makes Elaine take the subway home, and gives her a TV Guide to read on the ride home. On the subway, Elaine meets a man obsessed with television. Meanwhile, Kramer comes up with an idea for a coffee table that folds out from a book.
75 :05x11 - The Conversion
Writer: Bruce Kirschbaum
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Tom Verica (Doctor), Jerry Stiller (Frank Costanza), Estelle Harris (Estelle Costanza), Kay E. Kuter (Older Priest), Molly Hagan (Sister Roberta), Kimberly Campbell (Tawni), Jana Marie Hupp (Sasha), Bill Rose (Young Priest), Randy Brenner (Waiter), Darlene Kardon (Mrs. Lupchek), Karen Rizzo (Woman Hailing Cab)
George converts to Latvian Orthodox to be with a woman of the same religion, but his parents aren't pleased with the change. Jerry finds a tube of fungus cream in his girlfriend's medicine cabinet and has Elaine find out from her podiatrist friend what it's used for. Meanwhile, a sister at George's church becomes obsessed with Kramer.
76 :05x12 - The Stall
Writer: Larry Charles
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Jami Gertz (Jane), Dan Cortese (Tony)
While in the bathroom, Elaine runs out of toilet paper and asks the woman in the stall next to her for some. The woman, who happens to be Jerry's girlfriend, refuses to give her some. Elaine dates a man that Jerry refers to as a mimbo, a male bimbo. Elaine loves his face but it becomes disfigured while rock climbing with Kramer and George.
77 :05x13 - The Dinner Party
Writer: Larry David
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Fred Pinkard (Newsstand Guy), Frank Novak (Clerk), Mark Holton (David), Suzy Soro (Barbara), Kathryn Kates (Counter Woman), S. Marc Jordan (Man in Bakery), Langdon Bensing (Man on Street), Sayed Badreya (Foreign Man), Amjad J. Oaisen (Hussein), Roger Eschbacher (Man with Cane)
George, Jerry, Kramer and Elaine all struggle to come up with a dinner party gift. Jerry and Elaine decide to get a cake, but they don't take a number and are stuck with a cake with hair on it. Kramer and George decide to get wine, but George only has a 100 dollar bill that the cashier won't make change for.
78 :05x14 - The Marine Biologist
Writer: Charlie Rubin, Ron Hague
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Rosalind Allen (Diane), George Murdock (Testikov), Wayne Knight (Newman), Carol Kane (Corinne), Richard Fancy (Lippman), David Blackwood (Hotel Clerk), Heather Morgan (Woman at Beach), Larry David (Man on Beach)
Jerry tells an old college friend of Jerry and George's that George is a marine biologist. But the lie comes back to bite them when George is on the beach and is asked to save a whale. Meanwhile, Kramer has problems golfing and Elaine's pocket organizer is thrown from a limo by a Russian writer.
79 :05x15 - The Pie
Writer: Tom Gammill, Max Pross
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Eamonn Roche (Waiter), Paul Mantee (Health Inspector), Suzanne Snyder (Audrey), Christine Dunford (Saleswoman), Reni Santoni (Poppi), Lane Davies (MacKenzie), Mark Beltzman (Bob), Sunday Theodore (Olive), Sam Lloyd (Ricky), Patricia Belcher (Woman #1), Pamela Mant (Woman #2), Bernard Hocke (Guy in Diner), Robert Kino (Ricky's Boss), Tony Edwards (Businessman)
Jerry's girlfriend won't share a piece of pie with him. Elaine comes across a mannequin that looks exactly like her, and tries to find out where it came from. George tries to get a suit for half price and Kramer has a persistent itch.
80 :05x16 - The Stand-In
Writer: Larry David
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Mark Tymchyshyn (Phil), Karla Tamburrelli (Daphnie), Debbie Lee Carrington (Tammy), W. Earl Brown (Al), Michael Rivkin (Fulton), Joe Gieb (Johnny), Layne Beamer (Father), Thomas Dekker (Son), Jerome Betler (Director), Danny Woodburn (Mickey Abbott)
Kramer talks his midget friend, Mickey, to wear lifts to appear taller in his stand-in work. Jerry visits a friend at the hospital, but his visit doesn't help his health. George decides to break up with his girlfriend, but changes his mind when he hears that she's talked about breaking it off too. Meanwhile, Elaine's date "takes it out" in the car during their date.
81 :05x17 - The Wife
Writer: Peter Mehlman
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Courteney Cox (Meryl), Scott Larose (Greg), Joseph Ragno (Marty), Liz Sheridan (Helen), Barney Martin (Morty), Rebecca Glenn (Paula), Len Lesser (Uncle Leo), Lili Bernard (Anna), Nick LaTour (Grandpa), Susan Segal (Waitress), Lawrence Mandley (Coffee Shop Owner)
Jerry has his girlfriend pose as his wife to get a marriage discount on his dry cleaning. But when Uncle Leo overhears the woman say she's Jerry's wife, his plan begins to backfire. Meanwhile, at the gym George uses the shower as a bathroom and fears that the man that saw him will turn him in. Elaine can't figure out if a guy at the gym likes her or not and Kramer tries to impress his girlfriend's parents.
82 :05x18 - The Raincoats (1)
Writer: Tom Gammill, Max Pross, Larry David, Jerry Seinfeld
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Melanie Smith (Rachel), Annie Korzen (Doris Klompus), Jerry Stiller (Frank Costanza), Estelle Harris (Estelle Costanza), Barney Martin (Morty Seinfeld), Liz Sheridan (Helen Seinfeld), Sandy Baron (Klompus), Michael G. Hagerty (Rudy), Dorien Wilson (Alec), Judge Reinhold (Aaron), Lisa Pescia (Joanne)
Jerry's parents stay at his apartment before their trip to Paris. Since his parents are there, Jerry can't spend any alone-time with his girlfriend. Elaine's boyfriend, a "close-talker", becomes obsessed with Jerry's parents. Kramer and Morty Seinfeld go into business together and George tries to get out of the Big Brother program just after getting into it.
83 :05x19 - The Raincoats (2)
Writer: Larry David, Max Pross, Tom Gammill, Jerry Seinfeld
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Melanie Smith (Rachel), Annie Korzen (Doris Klompus), Wayne Knight (Newman), Jerry Stiller (Frank Costanza), Estelle Harris (Estelle Costanza), Barney Martin (Morty Seinfeld), Liz Sheridan (Helen Seinfeld), Sandy Baron (Klompus), Michael G. Hagerty (Rudy), Dorien Wilson (Alec), Stephen Pearlman (Mr. Goldstein), Judge Reinhold (Aaron), LaRita Shelby (Tour Leader), Jason Manary (Joey)
Jerry and his girlfriend go to Schindler's List, but don't spend too much time watching the movie. Newman, however, tries to watch the movie but is distracted by Jerry and his girlfriend. The Seinfelds miss their flight to France and George continues to try to get out of the Big Brother program.
84 :05x20 - The Fire
Writer: Larry Charles
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Melanie Chartoff (Robin), Veanne Cox (Toby), Dom Irrera (Ronnie), Jon Favreau (Eric the Clown), Lisa Pescia (Joanne), Hiram Kasten (Michael), Patience Cleveland (Robin's mother), Lawrence LeJohn (Fireman), Jerry Stiller (Frank Costanza), Estelle Harris (Estelle Costanza)
George goes to a party at his girlfriend's apartment, then flees the building after seeing a fire, pushing his girlfriend's son out of the way in the process. Kramer dates one of Elaine's co-workers, which bothers her, and Jerry plots revenge on the co-worker after she heckles him during one of his routines.
85 :05x21 - The Hamptons
Writer: Carol Leifer, Peter Mehlman
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Richard Burgi (Ben), Melanie Smith (Rachel), Lisa Mende (Carol), Melora Walters (Jane), Mark L. Taylor (Michael), Jesse D. Goins (Cop)
During a trip to the Hamptons to visit a new baby, George is angry that everyone saw his girlfriend topless, except him. Jerry's girlfriend sees George come out of a pool nude and George explains the concept of "shrinkage" to her. Meanwhile, Kramer finds a full lobster trap, Elaine meets a cute doctor, and everyone agrees that the new baby is hideous.
86 :05x22 - The Opposite
Writer: Jerry Seinfeld, Larry David, Andy Cowan
Director: Tom Cherones
Guest star: Melanie Smith (Rachel), Paul Gleason (Cushman), Estelle Harris (Estelle Costanza), Jerry Stiller (Frank Costanza), French Stewart (Manager), Kathie Lee Gifford (Herself), Marty Rackham (Jake Jarmel), Siobhan Fallon (Tina), Dedee Pfeiffer (Victoria), Regis Philbin (Himself), Hiram Kasten (Michael), Ken Takemoto (Chairman), Fritz Mashimo (Interpreter), Susan Segal (Waitress), Oscar Jordan (Counterperson), Rolando Molina (Punk #1), Michael Friedman (Punk #2), Martin Braverman (Poker Player #1), Wesley Thompson (Poker Player #2), Jeff Barton (Poker Player #3), Jeffrey von Meyer (Poker Player #4), Larry David (George Steinbrenner)
George realizes that if he'd do the opposite of what he would normally do, his luck may change for the better. Once George quits following his instincts, he finds himself with a job, girlfriend, and free of his parents. Elaine's luck isn't as good as George's after she buys a box of Jujyfruits. Kramer appears on Regis & Kathie Lee to promote his newest product.
87 :06x01 - The Chaperone
Writer: Bob Shaw, Bill Masters, Larry David
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Danny Tartabull (Himself), Marguerite MacIntyre (Karen (Miss Rhode Island)), Gail Strickland (Landis), Ian Abercrombie (Mr. Justin Pitt), Buck Showalter (Himself)
Jerry begins to date Miss Rhode Island, and when they need a chaperone to accompany them to the pageant, Kramer volunteers. At the pageant, Kramer tries to help her prepare and becomes her coach in the process. Meanwhile, Elaine tries to get a job at Doubleday, but ends up working for Mr. Pitt instead, and George decides the Yankees should use polyester uniforms instead of cotton.
88 :06x02 - The Big Salad
Writer: Larry David, Bob Shaw, Bill Masters
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Lauren Bowles (Waitress), Dean Hallo (Gendason), Barry Nolan (Reporter), Marita Geraghty (Margaret), Michelle Forbes (Julie), Jerry Levine (Stationer), Wayne Knight (Newman)
George and Susan pick up a big salad for Elaine, and once they deliver the salad to her, Elaine thanks Susan but not George. George can't forget that Susan took credit for that he bought. Elaine's boss wants a special mechanical pencil, and Elaine tries to get it from a stationary store where the clerk hits one her. Jerry goes on a date with a woman that was dumped by Newman, which makes Jerry wonder why Newman would dump her. Meanwhile, Kramer helps a man that he played golf with flee from the police in a white Ford Bronco.
89 :06x03 - The Pledge Drive
Writer: Max Pross, Tom Gammill
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Tom Wright (Executive (Morgan)), Kelly Coffield (Noreen), Billye Ree Wallace (Nana), Brian Reddy (Dan), Rebecca Staab (Kristin), Danny Tartabull (Himself), James Reynolds (Banker), Lauren Bowles (Waitress), F. J. Rio (Street Tough), Thom Vernon (Driver), Ian Abercrombie (Mr. Justin Pitt), Len Lesser (Uncle Leo)
Jerry finally goes to the bank to cash checks that his grandmother gave to him for his birthday. The checks bounce, causing a big hassle for his grandmother. Jerry volunteers to host a PBS fundraiser and George gets a Yankee player, Danny Tartabull, to attend the fundraiser. Meanwhile, Jerry thinks that one of Elaine's friends hit on him even though she is in a relationship and Elaine sets out to find out if she did or not.
90 :06x04 - The Chinese Woman
Writer: Peter Mehlman
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Jerry Stiller (Frank Costanza), Estelle Harris (Estelle Costanza), Kelly Coffield (Noreen), Angela Dohrmann (Donna Chang), William Utay (Dr. Korval), Lucy Lin (Hostess), Jack Tracy (Man), Larry David (Man in Cape)
Jerry dates a woman, who he thinks is Chinese, after phone lines get crossed and he asks her out. Kramer worries that his sperm count is low so he goes to a fertility clinic. George's parents separate and he worries that they're going to get divorced.
91 :06x05 - The Couch
Writer: Larry David
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Patton Oswalt (Clerk), Reni Santoni (Poppie), David James Elliott (Carl), Robert Hooks (Joe), Denise Dowse (Joe's Wife), Diana Theodore (Remy), Jessica Hecht (Marie), Mari Weiss (Woman #1), Tamar Cooper (Woman #2), Beverly C. Brown (Woman #3), Jeris Lee Poindexter (Moving Guy)
George joins a book club but since he doesn't like to read, he tries to rent the movie instead. When the movie he needs to see is rented out, he begs the family with the copy to watch it with them. Jerry buys a new couch and Elaine dates the delivery man until she learns his stance on a controversial topic. Meanwhile, Kramer goes into the pizza business with Poppie.
92 :06x06 - The Gymnast
Writer: Alec Berg, Jeff Schaffer
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Lois Nettleton (Mrs. Enright), Elina Löwensohn (Katya), Jessica Hecht (Lindsay), Maurice Godin (Misha), James R. Sweeney (Aronson), David Blackwood (Beck), Phil Ramsey (Man in Car), Damian London (Party Guest)
Jerry dates a gymnast and wants to have sex with her because of it. But, George, once again, strikes out in his relationship. Elaine's boss becomes obsessed with 3-D artwork and sends Elaine to represent him in a merger while he goes to find the painting. Meanwhile, Kramer has to pass a kidney stone.
93 :06x07 - The Soup
Writer: Fred Stoller
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Tracy Kolis (Kelly), Daniel Gerroll (Simon), Linda Wallem (Hildy), Lawrence Mandley (Manager), Michael Kaplan (Waiter), Steve Hytner (Kenny Bania)
Kenny Bania, Jerry's comic rival, gives him a free Armani suit, but asks for a free meal in return. At a restaurant, Jerry buys Kenny soup, but Kenny doesn't think it's enough. Because of his kidney stone, Kramer decides to eat only fresh fruit. Elaine brings back a man from England who mooches off of her. George tries to date a waitress from Monk's, but during a walk with her, she spells out her relationship with him.
94 :06x08 - The Mom & Pop Store
Writer: Tom Gammill, Max Pross
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Tom Wright (Morgan), Ian Abercrombie (Mr. Justin Pitt), Bryan Cranston (Tim Whatley), Jon Voight (Himself), Elsa Raven (Mom), Michael Robello (Pop), Ken Thorley (Car Salesman), Dan Frischman (Guy on Phone), Nancy Balbirer (Dentist #1), Rick Fitts (Dentist #2), Pat Asanti (Electrician), Steve Brady (Contest Winner), Matt Gallini (Tough Guy)
Kramer gets cut by a wire outside a mom and pop store and the store gets in trouble when it's inspected for faulty wiring. The repairs cost more than the store can afford, so Kramer and Jerry set out to help the store. Meanwhile, George buys a car he thinks was owned by Jon Voight and Elaine gets Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade tickets for Mr. Pitt.
95 :06x09 - The Secretary
Writer: Carol Leifer, Marjorie Gross
Director: David Trainer
Guest star: Vicki Lewis (Ade), Joseph R. Sicari (Willie), Arminae Azarian (Saleswoman), Mitzi McCall (Donna), Richard Marion (Guy), Thomas Mills (Moviegoer), Glynis McCants (Woman), Courtney Taylor (Attractive Applicant), Steve Hytner (Kenny Bania), Will Radford (Angry Guy)
Jerry sees his dry cleaner wearing one of his jackets he took in and goes to confront the man. George hires an unattractive secretary so he won't be distracted, but her efficiency gets her a raise, making her salary higher than George's. Kramer sells the clothes he's wearing to Kenny Bania and has to hide in a dressing room until he finds something to wear home. Later, Kramer gets Uma Thurman's phone number.
96 :06x10 - The Race
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Denise Poirier (Arlene), Michael Sorich (Castro), Todd Kimsey (Ned), Don McManus (Duncan), Claude Earl Jones (Mr. Bevilaqua), Spencer Klein (Kid), Eva Svensson (Woman), Renée Props (Lois), Vicki Lewis (Ada), Mark Christopher Lawrence (Store Manager), Martin Chow (Lew), Danny Woodburn (Mickey Abbott), Larry David (George Steinbrenner)
Elaine dates a communist, who talks to Kramer about Communism. Kramer gets a job as a department store Santa and tells the children communist propaganda. Jerry meets up with an old high school classmate who he beat in a track race. The friend argues that Jerry got a head start so they decide to re-race. Meanwhile, George responds to an ad in a communist newspaper, making his boss think that he's a communist.
97 :06x11 - The Switch
Writer: Bruce Kirschbaum, Sam Kass
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Gail Strickland (Landis), Wayne Knight (Newman), Sheree North (Babs Kramer), Charlotte Lewis (Nina), Jann Karam (Sandi), Terry Sweeney (Keith), Heather Medway (Laura), Clive Rosengren (Mr. Clotworthy), Jacqueline M. Houston (Lorraine), Cheryl Francis Harrington (Waitress), Tish Smiley (Woman)
Jerry dates a woman, but he likes her roommate more than her. George and Jerry try to come up with a plan of how Jerry can pull off a roommate switch. Meanwhile, George thinks his girlfriend is bulimic and Kramer decides it's time to start using his first name.
98 :06x12 - The Label Maker
Writer: Jeff Schaffer, Alec Berg
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Wayne Knight (Newman), Bryan Cranston (Tim Whatley), Jessica Tuck (Bonnie), Cleto Augusto (Scott), Wayne Grace (Ukranian)
Jerry and Elaine think that they got regifted when Jerry gets a label maker that Elaine gave to a friend for a gift. George convinces his girlfriend to have her male roommate move out, but soon regrets his decision. Kramer and Newman play a long game of Risk and Jerry ends up going to the Superbowl with an unexpected person.
99 :06x13 - The Scofflaw
Writer: Peter Mehlman
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Marty Rackham (Jake Jarmel), Wayne Knight (Newman), Barbara Alyn Woods (Debby), Ivory Ocean (Officer Morgan), Basil Hoffman (Salesman), Lillian Lehman (Judge), Jon Lovitz (Gary Fogel), Danny Breen (Guy with Glasses), Bob Shaw (Cabbie), Dale Harimoto (Reporter), Joe Ochman (Customer), Elisabeth Sjoli (Woman)
Kramer helps Newman to escape from a cop that's been trying to find Newman for years due to his bad parking. Jerry finds out that a man is faking cancer to get sympathy. Meanwhile, George gets a hairpiece and Elaine buys some sunglasses.
100 :06x14 - Highlights of a Hundred (1)
A clip-filled episode of highlights from the first 99 episodes of Seinfeld.
101 :06x15 - Highlights of a Hundred (2)
Part two of the 100 episode mark celebration with clips from the previous 99 episodes.
102 :06x16 - The Beard
Writer: Carol Leifer
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Georgann Johnson (Mrs. Stevenson), John F. O'Donohue (Gus), Edward Winter (Mr. Stevenson), Robert Mailhouse (Robert), Katherine La Nasa (Cathy), Jon Gries (Homeless Man), Joan Elizabeth (Denise), Jerry Diner (Lou), Mirron E. Willis (Officer #1), Ken Kerman (Officer #2)
Elaine tries to make a homosexual man "switch teams". George gets a hair piece that makes him look ridiculous but gives him more confidence. Kramer sets George up with a bald woman and debates whether or not he can date a bald woman. Jerry starts dating a cop but she makes him take a lie detector test when she thinks he's lying about not watching Melrose Place.
103 :06x17 - The Kiss Hello
Writer: Jerry Seinfeld, Larry David
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Liz Sheridan (Helen Seinfeld), Barney Martin (Morty Seinfeld), Len Lesser (Uncle Leo), Wendie Malick (Wendy), Billye Ree Wallace (Nana), Carol Leifer (Receptionist), Julio Oscar Mechoso (Julio), Rondi Reed (Mary), Gene Elman (Buddy), Mary Scheer (Joan), Louisa Abernathy (Nurse), Timothy McNeil (Jeff), Mark Fite (Jack), C. D. LaBove (Steve), Wendy Worthington (Louise), Belinda Barry (Stephanie)
Elaine's friend, a woman that Jerry has to 'kiss hello', has an old hairstyle and Jerry and Elaine try to get Kramer to tell her about it. Kramer puts up pictures of everyone in the building. Soon, Jerry gives every woman in the building a 'kiss hello' and when he stops, he becomes very unpopular. Meanwhile, George gets billed for an appointment that he missed so he tries to bill the doctor for canceling an appointment.
104 :06x18 - The Doorman
Writer: Max Pross, Tom Gammill
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Jack Betts (Mr. Green), Estelle Harris (Estelle Costanza), Jerry Stiller (Frank Costanza), Ian Abercrombie (Mr. Justin Pitt), Larry Miller (Doorman), Patrick Cronin (Farkus), Reni Santoni (Poppie), Edith Fields (Mrs. Payton), Nick Jameson (Horst), Barbara Pilavin (German Woman), Toni Sawyer (Tenant #1), Nigel Gibbs (Tenant #2), Deck McKenzie (Delivery Man), Trudi Forristal (Buxom Woman)
Jerry gets in trouble with the doorman at Elaine's boss's apartment but was only trying to be nice. Kramer and Frank Costanza go into business together to help the manly breast problem that Frank has.
105 :06x19 - The Jimmy
Writer: Gregg Kavet, Andy Robin
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Alison Armitage (Cheryl), Anthony Starke (Jimmy), Robert Katims (Deensfrei), Mel Tormé (Himself), J. D. Bridges (Paramedic), Elan Carter (Receptionist)
Elaine meets a man at the gym that she really wants to date and ends up talking to "the Jimmy", a man that refers to himself in the third person. Jerry goes to the dentist for some dental work and when he comes to, he sees the dentist and his assistant getting dressed, leading Jerry to wonder if he was violated while he was under. Meanwhile, Kramer is mistaken for a mentally handicapped man.
106 :06x20 - The Doodle
Writer: Alec Berg, Jeff Schaffer
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Guy Siner (Mandel), Len Lesser (Uncle Leo), Barney Martin (Morty Seinfeld), Liz Sheridan (Helen Seinfeld), Billye Ree Wallace (Nana), Christa Miller Lawrence (Paula), Dana Wheeler-Nicholson (Shelly), Ellis E. Williams (Karl), Coby Turner (Judy), Wayne C. Dvorak (Teacher), Norman Brenner (Passerby), Wayne Knight (Newman)
George finds a doodle that his girlfriend did of him. He has Elaine find out if she really likes him or not and learns that she likes him because "looks are not important". Jerry finds fleas in his apartment and figures out that they came from Newman. Elaine writes a manuscript but leaves it in Jerry's apartment right before it's fumigated. Meanwhile, Kramer gets ready for some peaches that are only in season two weeks per year.
107 :06x21 - The Fusilli Jerry
Writer: Marjorie Gross
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Estelle Harris (Estelle Costanza), Jerry Stiller (Frank Costanza), Patrick Warburton (David Puddy), Marla Sucharetza (Nancy), Lou Cutell (Dr. Cooperman), Yvette Cruise (Clerk)
Kramer gets the custom license plates that he ordered but they read ASSMAN instead of what he ordered. Despite being wrong, Kramer uses them anyway and wonders who assman is. Jerry comes up with a new move to use during sex and is mad when he finds out that Elaine's boyfriend uses it too. George tries to use the move but does it wrong so he has Jerry write instructions. The instructions work, but George's girlfriend dumps him when she sees them. Meanwhile, George's mother has eye surgery and Kramer makes a statue of Jerry out of fusilli pasta.
108 :06x22 - The Diplomat's Club
Writer: Max Pross, Tom Gammill
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: John Cothran, Jr. (Man), Wayne Knight (Newman), Ian Abercrombie (Mr. Justin Pitt), Tom Wright (Morgan), Robert Hooks (Joe), Debra Jo Rupp (Katie), Kim Zimmer (Lenore), O'Neal Compton (Earl), William B. Jackson (Doctor), Christine Cattell (Stewardess), Diana Theodore (Remy), Berta Maria Waagfjord (Bridgette), Mark Wheatle (Waiter), Ellis E. Williams (Carl (Exterminator))
Elaine decides to quit her job but changes her mind when she learns that Mr. Pitt added her to his will. George's boss thinks that he's a racist and George has to prove otherwise. After traveling to Ithaca, Jerry tries to meet a model at the airport's diplomat club but Katie, his assistant, makes the meeting nearly impossible. Meanwhile, Kramer starts gambling again and calls Newman to intervene.
109 :06x23 - The Face Painter
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Pierrino Mascarino (Father Hernandez), Mark DeCarlo (Alec Berg), Patrick Warburton (David Puddy), Katy Selverstone (Siena), Raye Birk (Mr. Pless), Joe Lala (Priest), Peggy Lane O'Rourke (Waitress), Dave Powledge (Fan #2), Jan Eddy (Fan #3), Lawrence LeJohn (Crowd Member), David Richardson (Fan #1)
George talks about toilet paper with his girlfriend and starts to think that he's in love with her. When he tells her about his feelings, she doesn't respond at all. Elaine dates a man who paints his face for hockey games and his actions at the games offend Elaine, Jerry and a priest. Meanwhile, a monkey throws a banana at Kramer, and when he throws it back, the monkey becomes depressed.
110 :06x24 - The Understudy
Writer: Carol Leifer, Marjorie Gross
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Alexandra Bokyun Chun (Lotus), Amy Hill (Kim), Jerry Stiller (Frank Costanza), John O'Hurley (J. Peterman), Bette Midler (Herself), June Kyoto Lu (Ruby), Adelaide Miller (Gennice), Vonnie C. Rhee (Sunny), Craig Thomas (Player #1), Michael McDonald (Player #2), Lou DiMaggio (Stagehand), Jason Beck (Umpire), Bob Shaw (Cabbie), Johnny Silver (Vendor #1), William Bastiani (Vendor #2)
Jerry and George play in a celebrity softball game and people think that they purposely injured Bette Midler after George accidentally slides into her at home plate. Kramer becomes friends with Bette Midler while she is in the hospital. Elaine thinks that a manicurist is talking bad about her in her native tongue and has George's father translate for her. Later, Elaine lands a job with the J. Peterman catalog.
111 :07x01 - The Engagement
Writer: Larry David
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Wayne Knight (Newman), Jerry Stiller (Frank Costanza), Estelle Harris (Estelle Costanza), Heidi Swedberg (Susan), Mario Joyner (Himself), Janni Brenn (Woman #2), Mailon Rivera (Cop #1), Athena Massey (Melanie), Ron Byron (Man), Renee Phillips (Alice), Cindy Cheung (Woman #1)
Jerry and George start to rethink their relationships with women. George gets back together with Susan, and after some convincing, she agrees to marry George. But after becoming engaged, George begins to feel trapped. Meanwhile, Jerry breaks up with his girlfriend and Elaine has a problem with a dog which Kramer and Newman help her solve.
112 :07x02 - The Postponement
Writer: Larry David
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Heidi Swedberg (Susan), Kelly Perine (Usher), Bruce Mahler (Rabbi Kirshbaum), John Rubano (Man), Evie Peck (Woman)
George convinces Susan to postpone their wedding date. Elaine becomes jealous towards George's engagement, upset that George is the first of the four to get engaged. Elaine talks about her jealousy with a rabbi, who tells Jerry about their conversation. Meanwhile, Kramer and Jerry see Plan 9 from Outer
Space but Kramer spills coffee on him when he tries to sneak it in.
113 :07x03 - The Maestro
Writer: Larry David
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Heidi Swedberg (Susan), Phil Morris (Jackie Chiles), Mark Metcalf (Maestro), Gary Yates (Security Guard), Paul Michael (Giggio), James Noah (Ned), Tim Bagley (Manager), Richard McGonagle (Mr. Star), Kenneth Ryan (Mr. Burns), Kymberly Newberry (Ms. Jordan), David Wendelman (Waiter)
George begins to feel the pressures of his relationship with Susan so he tries to help a security guard who works at a store that Susan's uncle owns. However, George's help ends up doing more bad then good. Elaine dates a man who likes to be called "the Maestro", who talks to Jerry about a house in Tuscany. Meanwhile, Kramer continues with his lawsuit against the coffee shop that gave him the coffee that he spilled on himself in the previous episode.
114 :07x04 - The Wink
Writer: Max Pross, Tom Gammill
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Tom Wright (Morgan), Larry David (George Steinbrenner), Richard Herd (Wilhelm), Brian McNamara (James), Stacey Travis (Holly), Ian Patrick Williams (Stubs), Paul O'Neill (Himself), Clive Rosengren (Waiter), Thomas Dekker (Bobby)
At work, George gets put in charge of a birthday card for the Yankees, but after getting grapefruit juice in his eye, George begins to wink at the wrong times. Jerry dates Elaine's cousin, but dating her conflicts with his new diet. Meanwhile, Elaine goes on a blind date.
115 :07x05 - The Hot Tub
Writer: Gregg Kavet, Andy Robin
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Leon Russom (Clayton), Larry David (George Steinbrenner), Richard Herd (Wilhelm), Jeremiah Birkett (Jean-Paul), Ernie Lively (Zeke), Charles Cyphers (Gardner), Kate Mulligan (Sheri), Susan Isaacs (Woman), Thom Barry (Manager), Jeff Miller (Event Guard)
George picks up a new way of speaking after spending time with baseball officials. But when George uses the words he picked up at work, he runs into some trouble. Elaine has an immigrant runner, who overslept before the Olympics and missed them, as a house guest. Jerry helps to make sure that he doesn't oversleep again. Meanwhile, Kramer gets a hot tub.
116 :07x06 - The Soup Nazi
Writer: Spike Feresten
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: John Paragon (Ray), Wayne Knight (Newman), Heidi Swedberg (Susan), Steve Hytner (Kenny Bania), Vivicca Whitsett (Customer #1), Larry Thomas (Soup Nazi), Alexandra Wentworth (Sheila "Schmoopie"), Yul Vazquez (Bob), Thom Barry (Super), Vince Melocchi (Furniture Guy), Ana Gasteyer (Woman), Cedric Duplechain (Customer), Michael Michaud (Customer)
A new soup restaurant opens with soup that everyone loves. But the owner, dubbed 'the Soup Nazi', is eccentric and wants everyone to follow a strict ordering procedure. Both Jerry and Elaine make mistakes ordering and are angry when they aren't allowed back. Elaine's furniture is stolen and Kramer convinces the soup Nazi to give an armoire to Kramer to give to his friend who's furniture was stolen. Later, Elaine discovers the soup recipe in the armoire from the soup Nazi.
117 :07x07 - The Secret Code
Writer: Alec Berg, Jeff Schaffer
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Lewis Arquette (Leapin' Larry), Heidi Swedberg (Susan), John O'Hurley (J. Peterman), Fred Stoller (Fred Yerkes), Wayne Tippet (Captain), Ellen Albertini Dow (Momma), David St. James (Doctor), Michael Luckerman (Man)
George tries to keep his ATM code secret from Susan. Elaine becomes interested in a man who can't remember her. Jerry's foot falls asleep at the wrong time and a one-legged man thinks that Jerry's making fun of him. Meanwhile, Kramer gets an emergency band scanner and tries to help reorganize different operations at the fire department.
118 :07x08 - The Pool Guy
Writer: David Mandel
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Wayne Knight (Newman), Heidi Swedberg (Susan), Carlos Jacott (Ramon), Billy Williams (Usher), Alec Mapa (Paul), Dom Magwili (Dustin), Mr. Moviefone (Himself)
Jerry gets annoyed by a pool guy who really wants to be friends with Jerry. Kramer helps Jerry get rid of him by pretending to be moviefone each time the pool guy calls Jerry. Elaine gets tickets for a historical clothing exhibit but realizes she has no female friends. Jerry suggests that she invite Susan and George worries that his two worlds of "independent George" and "relationship George" will clash.
119 :07x09 - The Sponge
Writer: Peter Mehlman
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: John Paragon (Cedric), Heidi Swedberg (Susan), Scott Patterson (Billy), Jennifer Guthrie (Lena), Yul Vazquez (Bob), David Byrd (Roger), Ileen Getz (Organizer), Steven Hack (Walker #1), Wren T. Brown (Walker #2), P. B. Hutton (Walker #3), Susan Moore (Monica)
Elaine finds out that her favorite birth control method, "the sponge" is going to be discontinued, so she goes around town to find all the sponges she can find. Since she could only find a limited amount, Elaine comes up with a system of requiring her dates to prove they're "spongeworthy". Each date comes up with some way of proving himself. George gets in trouble with Jerry after telling Susan things that Jerry confided in George.
120 :07x10 - The Gum
Writer: Max Pross, Tom Gammill
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Matt McCoy (Lloyd Braun), Mary Jo Keenen (Deena), Eric Christmas (Haarwood), Sandy Ward (Pop Lazzari), Ruth Cohen (Cashier), Lionel Mark Smith (Florist), Vito D'Ambrosio (Cop), Alan Watt (Attendant), Larry David (Newspaper Stand Worker)
Kramer becomes active in getting an old theater reopened. Kramer also befriends one of George's old friends, Lloyd, who is recovering from a nervous breakdown. Kramer tries the gum that Lloyd likes and insists that everyone try it as well. Meanwhile, George's car catches fire.
121 :07x11 - The Rye
Writer: Carol Leifer
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Grace Zabriskie (Mrs. Ross), Warren Frost (Mr. Ross), Estelle Harris (Estelle Costanza), Jerry Stiller (Frank Costanza), Heidi Swedberg (Susan), Jeff Yagher (John), Frances Bay (Mabel Choate), Leonard Lightfoot (Clyde), Don Amendolia (Dennis), Kathryn Kates (Counter Woman), Steve Ireland (Music Guy), Dean Fortunato (Manager)
George, along with his parents, is invited for dinner at his girlfriend's parent's house. They bring along a marble rye bread to give to her parents. But as they leave, George accidentally grabs the bread on the way out, causing a stir. Now, George, with the help of Kramer and Jerry, try to get a loaf of marble rye back into the house. Meanwhile, Elaine dates a jazz saxophonist.
122 :07x12 - The Caddy
Writer: Andy Robin, Gregg Kavet
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Armin Shimerman (Stan), Jerry Stiller (Frank Costanza), Estelle Harris (Estelle Costanza), Heidi Swedberg (Susan), Phil Morris (Jackie Chiles), John O'Hurley (J. Peterman), Larry David (George Steinbrenner), Richard Herd (Wilhelm), Brenda Strong (Sue Ellen), Arthur Rosenberg (Judge), Cynthia Madvig (Woman #1), Marilyn Tokuda (Woman #2)
George leaves his car in the parking lot at Yankee Stadium waiting for a locksmith. George's boss thinks that George is putting in extra hours, because is car is there all day, and gives him a promotion. After finding out that his boss thinks he's putting in extra hours because his car is there, George decides to take a vacation, but leave the car there so his boss thinks he's working. However, his plan backfires after Steinbrenner thinks he's dead. Meanwhile, Kramer begins to play golf and trusts his caddy for everything. Elaine runs into an old rival who never wears a bra.
123 :07x13 - The Seven
Writer: Alec Berg, Jeff Schaffer
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Wayne Knight (Newman), Heidi Swedberg (Susan), Ken Hudson Campbell (Ken), Shannon Holt (Carrie), Lisa Deanne (Christie), Charles Emmett (Orderly), David Richards (Maitre d'), Matthew McCurley (Kid), Josh Abramson (Man #1)
Elaine finds a bike that she wants but strains her neck trying to get it down off of a wall. Kramer helps Elaine get rid of her neck problems, but wants the bike in exchange for his help. George tells Susan that he wants to name their first child Seven, but gets angry when Susan's cousin names her child Seven. Meanwhile, Jerry notices that his girlfriend always wears the same dress when the go out, and Kramer keeps a tab of things he takes from Jerry's.
124 :07x14 - The Cadillac (1)
Writer: Larry David, Jerry Seinfeld
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Marisa Tomei (Herself), Liz Sheridan (Helen Seinfeld), Barney Martin (Morty Seinfeld), Heidi Swedberg (Susan), Sandy Baron (Klompus), Ann Morgan Guilbert (Evelyn), Walter Olkewicz (Nick Stevens), Annabelle Gurwitch (Katy), Bill Macy (Herb), Jesse White (Ralph)
Jerry goes to Florida to surprise his parents with a Cadillac. Kramer and Elaine find out how much money Jerry makes, and Elaine becomes interested in Jerry again. George rethinks his engagement when he learns that he may be able to meet Marisa Tomei. Meanwhile, Kramer gets revenge on the cable company and Klompus accuses Morty Seinfeld of embezzling condo funds to pay for his new Cadillac.
125 :07x15 - The Cadillac (2)
Writer: Jerry Seinfeld, Larry David
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Annie Korzen (Doris Klompus), Liz Sheridan (Helen Seinfeld), Barney Martin (Morty Seinfeld), Heidi Swedberg (Susan), Sandy Baron (Klompus), Marisa Tomei (Herself), Walter Olkewicz (Nick Stevens), Ann Morgan Guilbert (Evelyn), Frances Bay (Mabel Choate), Bill Macy (Herb), Jesse White (Ralph), Daniel Zacapa (John (Power Guy)), Golde Starger (Bldg A), Janice Davies (Bldg B), Art Frankel (Bldg C)
Elaine gives George Marisa Tomei's phone number and Susan becomes suspicious. Elaine helps George with Marisa by being his alibi, which involves being an importer/exporter named Art Vandelay. In Florida, Jerry runs into the woman that he stole the marble rye from. Meanwhile, Kramer is finally victorious over the cable guy.
126 :07x16 - The Shower Head
Writer: Marjorie Gross, Peter Mehlman
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Wayne Knight (Newman), John O'Hurley (J. Peterman), Barney Martin (Morty Seinfeld), Liz Sheridan (Helen Seinfeld), Estelle Harris (Estelle Costanza), Jerry Stiller (Frank Costanza), Len Lesser (Uncle Leo), Jay Leno (Himself), Ron West (Dr. Strugatz), Tim De Zarn (Salesman), Michelle Bonilla (Waitress), Angelo DiMascio, Jr. (Man)
Elaine has to get a physical before she can go to Africa with J. Peterman. However, after eating poppy seeds, she tests positive for opium. Jerry and Newman plot to get new shower heads after the building installs new shower heads to conserve water. George's parents decide to move to Florida, only in spite of the Seinfelds.
127 :07x17 - The Doll
Writer: Tom Gammill, Max Pross
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Jerry Stiller (Frank Costanza), Estelle Harris (Estelle Costanza), Heidi Swedberg (Susan), Kathy Griffin (Sally Weaver), Mark Metcalf (Maestro), Mary Jo Keenen (Deena), Monica Allison (Stewardess), Larry Braman (Stage Manager), John Lizzi (The Other Guy)
George's girlfriend has a doll that looks exactly like George's mother. Jerry carries a package for one of Susan's friends, who warns Jerry to be careful with it. Jerry doesn't break her package, but he ends up breaking barbecue sauce that he was going to use in an act. Meanwhile, Frank Costanza turns George's room into a pool room and plays pool in his underwear with Kramer and the Maestro.
128 :07x18 - The Friars Club
Writer: David Mandel
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Heidi Swedberg (Susan), John O'Hurley (J. Peterman), Phil Morris (Jackie Chiles), Rob Schneider (Bob), Pat Cooper (Himself), Samantha Smith (Hallie), Lisa Kushell (Connie), Robert Martin Robinson (Maitre 'd), Norman Large (Dectective), Peggy Lane (Waitress), The Flying Karamazov Brothers (The Flying Sandos Brothers)
Jerry borrows a jacket to get into the Friars Club, but loses it at a dinner theater. Kramer tries to sleep like Leonardo di Vinci, but ends up falling asleep at inopportune times. Peterman hires a deaf employee and Elaine tries to prove that he his not deaf by coming on to him. Peterman sees this and tries to set the two up.
129 :07x19 - The Wig Master
Writer: Spike Feresten
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Harry Van Gorkum (Craig), Norman Brenner (Ian), Heidi Swedberg (Susan), Patrick Bristow (Wig Master (Ethan)), Gina Mastrogiacomo (Prostitute), Kim Chase (Charmaine), Chaim Jeraffi (Jiffy Park Guy), Michael McDonald (Jesse), Pamela Dillman (Saleswoman), Zack Phifer (Bob), Shashi Bhatia (Flower Girl)
Jerry gets Elaine to help him prove that a sales clerk is wrong about a jacket, but Elaine ends up dating the clerk. George and Kramer find a cheap parking lot and decide to park their cars there. Later, George finds that a hooker used his car after he finds a used condom in the car. George then thinks that the condom may be the key to get out of marrying Susan. Meanwhile, George has an unwanted house guest, a wig master for a play.
130 :07x20 - The Calzone
Writer: Jeff Schaffer, Alec Berg
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Wayne Knight (Newman), John D'Aquino (Todd), Peter Allas (Counter Guy), Danette Tays (Nicki), Greg Collins (Policeman), Jane A. Johnston (Todd's Mother), Larry David (George Steinbrenner)
George has Steinbrenner try an eggplant calzone, and afterwards, Steinbrenner has to consult George before making any major moves or decisions. Jerry thinks that Elaine's boyfriend is dating her without him actually asking her out. Kramer starts wearing warm clothes straight out of the dryer, but has to heat them in the oven when he runs out of quarters.
131 :07x21 - The Bottle Deposit (1)
Writer: Andy Robin, Gregg Kavet
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Wayne Knight (Newman), John O'Hurley (J. Peterman), Richard Herd (Wilhelm), Brad Garrett (Tony), Brenda Strong (Sue Ellen), Patrick Kerr (Clerk), Harvey Jason (Auctioneer), Larry Polson (Homeless Guy)
George's boss gives him an important assignment, but George doesn't hear all of the details. Elaine overbids on a set of golf clubs for J. Peterman. He tells her not to go over 10,000 dollars, but once Sue Ellen keeps bidding higher than Elaine, Elaine goes over the amount. Once she wins the clubs, she leaves them in Jerry's car. This turns out to be a problem when Jerry takes his car to a fanatical mechanic who takes the car, and the clubs, because Jerry has been mistreating the car. Meanwhile, Kramer and Newman devise a plan to take a bunch of cans to Michigan where they get more per can than in New York.
132 :07x22 - The Bottle Deposit (2)
Writer: Gregg Kavet, Andy Robin
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Dan O'Connor (Young Cop), Wayne Knight (Newman), John O'Hurley (J. Peterman), Richard Herd (Wilhelm), Brad Garrett (Tony), Mary Jo Keenen (Deena), Rance Howard (Farmer), Nicholas Mele (Detective), Karen Lynn Scott (Farmer's Daughter), Sandy Ward (Pop), Bonnie McNeil (Woman), Larry David (George Steinbrenner)
George's boss is impressed by George's work on the project. Jerry has a detective try to find his car, but the detective doesn't come up with anything. On their way to Michigan, Kramer and Newman see Jerry's car in Ohio and Kramer pursues the car. But in the pursuit, Kramer throws all of the cans and bottles, then Newman out of the mail truck to go faster. The mechanic throws the golf clubs at Kramer to try to lose him. Elaine delivers the mangled clubs to Peterman, who thinks that JFK had a bad temper.
133 :07x23 - The Wait Out
Writer: Peter Mehlman
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Heidi Swedberg (Susan), Danny Woodburn (Mickey Abbott), Cary Elwes (David), Debra Messing (Beth), Allan Harvey (Policeman), Diana Castle (Mrs. Zanfino), Todd Bosley (Joey), J. G. Hertzler (Mr. Berger), Nicole Tocantins (Barbara)
Kramer starts wearing tight pants that are hard for him to get in and out of. George comments on a couple's relationship and Jerry and Elaine wait for them to break up so they can pursue them. But George begins to feel bad about the comment, but Jerry and Elaine try to convince him that it was okay. Later, Susan hears about what George said and George begins to think that it may be the way out of getting married.
134 :07x24 - The Invitations
Writer: Larry David
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Stephen Root (Mr. Lager), Victor Raider-Wexler (Doctor), Heidi Swedberg (Susan), Janeane Garofalo (Jeannie Steinman), John Riggi (Teller), Sue Goodman (Clerk), Julie Clark (Waitress), Fred Goehner (Delivery Guy), Carol Leifer (Bank Employee)
As the wedding date gets closer and closer, George continues to try to get out of the marriage. Everyone gives him suggestions on how to get out of it -- Elaine suggests taking up smoking and Kramer suggests a pre-nup so she thinks he has trust issues. Later, George picks up the invitations for the wedding. Susan licks all of them before sending it out, then gets sick from the adhesive. Susan dies from the illness, and George feels that he's finally free. Meanwhile, Jerry gets engaged to a girl who saved his life, but immediately regrets it, and Kramer comes across a bank that will give out $100 if a teller doesn't say 'hello'.
135 :08x01 - The Foundation
Writer: Jeff Schaffer, Alec Berg
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Janeane Garofalo (Jeannie Steinman), John O'Hurley (J. Peterman), Bruce Davison (Wyck), Grace Zabriskie (Mrs. Ross), Warren Frost (Mr. Ross), Joe Urla (Dugan), Susan Walters (Dolores), Todd Bosley (Joey), Diana Castle (Mrs. Zanfino), Stuart Quan (Sensei), Herb Mitchell (Businessman #1), Robert Louis Kempf (Businessman #2), Lawrence Mandley (Larry), Lauren Bowles (Waitress #1), Peggy Lane (Waitress #2), Paige Tomada (Clara), Robert Padnick (Willie), Ruthie Cohen (Ruthie)
George starts to move on with his life after Susan's death. Susan's parents start a foundation in Susan's memory and want George to run it. Jerry runs into Delores and she tries to get back with him until she finds out that he broke off an engagement. Elaine takes over as head of the Peterman company while Peterman is in Burma. Meanwhile, Kramer becomes a karate instructor.
136 :08x02 - The Soul Mate
Writer: Peter Mehlman
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Wayne Knight (Newman), Bruce Davison (Wyck), Tim DeKay (Kevin), Lisa Mende (Carol), Kim Myers (Pam), Rende Rae Norman (Ms. Baines), Tommy Hicks (Mr. Cross), Jill Talley (Gail), Jill Holder (Lisa)
George begins to think that the foundation suspects that George was the one that killed Susan. To find out for sure, George hides a tape recorder in a brief case and leaves it in a foundation meeting. Elaine gets pressured from her friends to have a baby, but soon after she meets a man that wants no children and even has a vasectomy to prove it. Meanwhile, Kramer goes to Newman for advice when he finds himself attracted to Jerry's girlfriend.
137 :08x03 - The Bizarro Jerry
Writer: David Mandel
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Justina Vail (Amanda), Tim DeKay (Kevin), Kristin Bauer (Gillian), Pat Kilbane (Bizarro Kramer (Feldman)), Kyle T. Heffner (Bizarro George (Gene)), J. Patrick McCormack (Leland), Harry S. Murphy (Office Manager), Dana Patrick (Model #1), Shireen Crutchfield (Model #2), Robin Nance (Model #3), Mark S. Larson (Bizarro Newman (Vargas)), James Lesure (Office Worker), Jason Beck (Bouncer)
Elaine makes new friends who are the exact opposite of Jerry, George and Kramer. Jerry dates a woman who is very beautiful but has "man hands". George finds a way to get into the "Forbidden City", a place where models hang out. Kramer uses the bathroom at an office building and starts to work there.
138 :08x04 - The Little Kicks
Writer: Spike Feresten
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Rebecca McFarland (Anna), Joe Urla (Dugan), Jerry Stiller (Frank Costanza), Neil Giuntoli (Brody), Tim O'Hare (Vendor)
George watches Elaine dance at an office party and notices how bad of a dancer she is. However, Elaine thinks that she is a great dancer until she watches a video of her dancing. Elaine tells a co-worker that George is a bad boy, which the woman finds attractive. To further his new image, he begins to drive fast, but his real self shows when is arrested for making a bootleg video. When Jerry gets tickets to a film premiere, Kramer talks Jerry helping him make bootleg videos of the premiere.
139 :08x05 - The Package
Writer: Jennifer Crittenden
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Wayne Knight (Newman), Len Lesser (Uncle Leo), Richard Roat (Dr. Berg), Fort Atkinson (Dr. Stern), David Purdham (Dr. Resnick), Heather Campbell (Sheila), Ramon Franco (Mailman), Bari K. Willerford (Ron), Shuko Akune (Receptionist), F. William Parker (Country Doctor), Lynn A. Henderson (Clerk), Bill Gratton (Postal Official), Susan Leslie (Nurse)
George thinks the woman at the photo lab is coming on to him when he finds pictures of a woman in his photos. Kramer sees that Jerry has a stereo that he doesn't like, so he helps Jerry get a refund on the stereo. To do so, he mails Jerry the stereo in pieces, and since Kramer insured the package, Jerry ought to be able to get money for the damaged stereo. However, Kramer's scheme doesn't go as well as he had planned. Meanwhile, Elaine tries to look at her medical records and has Kramer pose as a doctor to do so.
140 :08x06 - The Fatigues
Writer: Andy Robin, Gregg Kavet
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Estelle Harris (Estelle Costanza), Jerry Stiller (Frank Costanza), Joe Urla (Dugan), Ned Bellamy (Eddie), A. J. Langer (Abby), Katie Layman (Cynthia), Eddie Allen (Doctor), Gwen McGee (Janine), Lynn Manning (Blind Man), Steve Hytner (Kenny Bania), Richard Herd (Wilhelm)
Elaine has to fire a man, but can't do it and ends up promoting him instead. The man that she promoted wears army fatigues and constantly talks about wars and battles. While working on the J. Peterman catalog, the man causes everyone to quit, leaving him and Elaine as the only employees. Jerry's new girlfriend has a friend who is being mentored by Kenny Bania, and later, Jerry becomes Kenny's mentor. Meanwhile, George learns about risk management by listening to tapes, and Kramer has Frank help him cook a Jewish meal.
141 :08x07 - The Checks
Writer: Steve O'Donnell, Tom Gammill, Max Pross
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Richard Herd (Wilhelm), James Patrick Stuart (Brett), Gedde Watanabe (Mr. Oh), Sab Shimono (Executive #1), Jock Plotnick (Crew Leader), George Wallace (Doctor), Toshi Toda (Mr. Tanaka), Goh Misawa (Mr. Yamaguchi), Tony V. (Clicky), Akane Nelson (Executive #2), Cherie Hankal (Nurse), Dave Pierce (Carl Farbman), John Bowman (Teddy)
Jerry receives his royalty checks for his appearance on a Japanese TV show and gets writer's cramp after signing them all. Kramer helps some Japanese tourists by finding them sleeping quarters in a chest of drawers. Kramer tries to show the tourists that Jerry's show would be a hit in Japan, but the tourists dislike Jerry after he has to hack them out of the chest of drawers. Meanwhile, Elaine's boyfriend loves a song that Elaine hates, so she tries to find a song that they'll both like, and George hires carpet cleaners for Yankee Stadium who Kramer think are in a religious cult.
142 :08x08 - The Chicken Roaster
Writer: Jeff Schaffer, Alec Berg
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Michael D. Roberts (Roger Ipswich), Wayne Knight (Newman), John O'Hurley (J. Peterman), Mark Roberts (Seth), Kymberly Kalil (Heather), Wesley Leong (Clerk), Christopher Aguilar (Burmese Boy)
Elaine lets George buy an expensive hat with her company expense account. She tries to replace the hat with a Russian fur hat, but has no luck. Later, Elaine heads to Burma to have Peterman authorize her expenses. Jerry and Kramer switch apartments when a new chicken restaurant opens across from Kramer's apartment. George develops a plan to leave things in his dates' apartments so he can have a reason to call them the next day.
143 :08x09 - The Abstinence
Writer: Steve Koren
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Bob Odenkirk (Ben), Fern Fitzgerald (Ms. Wilkie), Lawrence Mandley (Larry the Cook), Phil Morris (Jackie Chiles), Debra Jo Rupp (Katie), Brenda Strong (Sue Ellen), Meagen Fay (Mrs. Burns), Tamara Bick (Louise), Alex Trebek (Himself), Derek Jeter (Himself), Bernie Williams (Himself), Noelle Balfour (Waitress), Kyle Gass (Smoker), Judy Kerr (Woman), David Letterman (Himself)
George decides to abstain from sex with his girlfriend because she has a disease that would be complicated by sex. After not having sex for so long, George becomes smart and finds that he's wasted his intellectual talents in his constant pursuit of sex. Meanwhile, Jerry gets bumped from a local school's career day, Kramer opens a smoking lounge that causes some health problems, and Elaine dates someone who's almost a doctor.
144 :08x10 - The Andrea Doria
Writer: Spike Feresten
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Fred Pinkard (Old Man), Wayne Knight (Newman), Estelle Harris (Estelle Costanza), Jerry Stiller (Frank Costanza), Tom Gallop (Alan), Ray Stricklyn (Clarence), Diana Bellamy (Mrs. Ricardi), Rick Hall (Vet), Carl Banks (Policeman #1), Barry Cutler (Policeman #2), Kev O'Neil (Waiter), Ossie Mair (Driver), Rene Weisser (Ex-Girlfriend), Brian Blondell (Dog Guy), Theresa Mulligan (Woman), Florinel Fatulescu (Stand Owner)
George goes up against a survivor of the Andrea Doria shipwreck to get a cheap apartment. Though the panel originally leans toward giving the apartment to the survivor, George wins them over by telling them about his pathetic life and his fiancee dying. Elaine dates a man who has trouble breaking up with women. Jerry and Newman team up to get rid of each other forever -- Jerry helps Newman deliver mail on Sunday so he can get a mail job in Hawaii.
145 :08x11 - The Little Jerry
Writer: Jennifer Crittenden
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Paul Perri (Detective Banner), Barney Martin (Morty Seinfeld), Liz Sheridan (Helen Seinfeld), John Michael Higgins (Kurt), Miguel Sandoval (Marcelino), Andrea Bendewald (Celia), Kathryn Joosten (Betsy), Al White (Detective Udewitz), Ray Proscia (Guard)
Jerry bounces a check at a market and the owner puts it up for everyone to see. Jerry soon finds that the owner runs an underground cock fight, so Jerry and Kramer train Kramer's rooster, named Little Jerry, to beat the big rooster. Meanwhile, Elaine dates a man who prefers to shave his head, and Elaine tries to convince him to grow his hair back. George dates a convict who is serving time at a local prison.
146 :08x12 - The Money
Writer: Peter Mehlman
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Liz Sheridan (Helen Seinfeld), Barney Martin (Morty Seinfeld), Estelle Harris (Estelle Costanza), Jerry Stiller (Frank Costanza), Sandy Baron (Klompus), John O'Hurley (J. Peterman), Sarah Silverman (Emily), Leon W. Grant (Counterperson)
Jerry's parents think that Jerry has run into financial trouble, so they sell the Cadillac that Jerry gave them to Klompus for 6000 dollars. Jerry then goes to Florida to get the car back, but ends up paying Klompus 14,000 dollars for it. Meanwhile, Elaine helps Morty get a job at the Peterman company and George, thinking he'll have a big inheritance, starts spending a lot of money.
147 :08x13 - The Comeback
Writer: Gregg Kavet, Andy Robin
Director: David Trainer
Guest star: Ivana Milicevic (Patty), Mark Harelik (Milos), Ben Stein (Shellbach), Joel Polis (Reilly), Danny Strong (Vincent), Richard Livingston (Bill), Charles Kahlenberg (Fred), Stan Sellers (McAdam), Peggy Mannix (Woman), Fatima Love (Secretary), Nancy Linehan Charles (Woman Executive), Jeff Hatz (Manager (Gene))
George is teased at a meeting by Reily and can't think of a good comeback until it's too late. Determined to deliver his great comeback, George tracks down Reily, who no longer works for the Yankees, in Ohio and personally gives him the comeback. Meanwhile, Jerry buys a tennis racket from a man he thought was a professional tennis player, Kramer wonders what his life would be like if he was in a coma, and a reviewer named Vincent becomes interested in Elaine.
148 :08x14 - The Van Buren Boys
Writer: Darin Henry
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: John O'Hurley (J. Peterman), Jed Rhein (Steven), Christine Taylor (Ellen), Barney Martin (Morty Seinfeld), Liz Sheridan (Helen Seinfeld), David Moscow (Lomez Jr.), Bruce Davison (Wyck), Tony Colitti (Leader), Yunoka Doyle (Lydia), Dublin James (Maurice), Justine Slater (Melissa), Michele Maika (Kim), Steve Hofvendahl (Man)
George interviews candidates for the foundation money. He doesn't find anyone he likes until he finds a boy who is similar to him and agrees to give the boy the scholarship. Later, George has a run-in with a gang, The Van Buren Boys, and by accident flashes their gang sign. The gang think he is one of them until George goes to far to prove that he is. Peterman, after deciding his biography would be boring, buys the rights to some of Kramer's life stories for 750 dollars. Jerry meets the "perfect" girlfriend.
149 :08x15 - The Susie
Writer: David Mandel
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Lee Arenberg (Mike Moffit), Megan Cole (Peggy), Shannon Kenny (Allison), John O'Hurley (J. Peterman), Richard Herd (Wilhelm), Jane Edith Wilson (Woman)
Elaine decides to have an alter-ego when a co-worker mistakenly calls her Susie. Susie gets blamed for everything at work and Elaine becomes more popular because she is the only one that ever can find Susie. However, Elaine has to fake Susie's death when Peterman wants to see Elaine and Susie in his office. Kramer places a bet in Jerry's name and the bookie comes after Jerry, and Kramer causes George's girlfriend to leave him.
150 :08x16 - The Pothole
Writer: Daniel O'Keefe, Steve O'Donnell
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Kristin Davis (Jenna), Jack McGee (Ralph), Seraiah Carol (Mrs. Allister), Radmar Agana Jao (Delivery Boy), Walter Addison (Man), Wayne Knight (Newman), George Cheung (Owner)
Jerry accidentally drops his girlfriend's toothbrush in the toilet and she uses it before he can tell her about it. Not wanting to tell her the truth, Jerry tries to sterilize her mouth and refuses to kiss her. Once he finally tells her, she drops something of his in the toilet and won't tell him what it is, sending Jerry into a frenzy. Meanwhile, Kramer adopts a highway and spends his time keeping it spotless. He starts to think that the lanes are too narrow, so he covers the current lines with black paint. Elaine tries to order Chinese, but the restaurant won't deliver to her side of the street so she finds another way to get the food.
151 :08x17 - The English Patient
Writer: Steve Koren
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: John O'Hurley (J. Peterman), Liz Sheridan (Helen Seinfeld), Barney Martin (Morty Seinfeld), Lloyd Bridges (Izzy), Chelsea Noble (Danielle), O'Neal Compton (Earl Haffler), Lisa Mende (Carol), Gene Dynarski (Izzy Jr.), Marco Rodriguez (Guillermo), Joe Urla (Dugan), Jill Talley (Gail), Jill Holden (Lisa), Todd Jeffries (Blaine), Earl Schuman (Izzy Sr.), Edgar Small (Sid Luckman), Lauren Bowles (Waitress), Juan Garcia (Jaime), Jeff Miller (Neil)
The gang alienates Elaine when they find out that she didn't like The English Patient. She lies to Peterman about seeing it, so he arranges for her to watch it. Kramer teaches a group of Dominicans about communism, which leads them to revolt on Kramer. Jerry goes to Florida to visit his parents where an elderly man challenges Jerry to a weightlifting competition. Meanwhile, a woman mistakes George for her boyfriend.
152 :08x18 - The Nap
Writer: Gregg Kavet, Andy Robin
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Kyle Sullivan (Son), Richard Herd (Wilhelm), Stephen Lee (Conrad), Vince Grant (Hal), Angelo Tiffe (Delivery Man), Mik Scriba (Bomb Squad Guy), Terry Rhoads (Father), Sid Newman (Old Man), Kevin Keckeisen (Brian), JoNell Kennedy (Secretary), Larry David (George Steinbrenner)
George begins to nap under his desk and everyone assumes that he is working because no one can find him. Steinbrenner decides to wait in George's office for him to return, so George has Jerry call in a bomb threat to get Steinbrenner out of his office. Elaine's boyfriend gives her a mattress, which she then gives to Kramer because it was a "commitment gift". Meanwhile, Jerry has his kitchen redone and Kramer takes up swimming.
153 :08x19 - The Yada Yada
Writer: Jill Franklyn, Peter Mehlman
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Stephen Caffrey (Arnie), David Chandler (Brian), Danny Woodburn (Mickey Abbott), Bryan Cranston (Whatley), Robert Wagner (Dr. Abbott), Jill St. John (Mrs. Abbott), Debra Messing (Beth), Suzanne Cryer (Marcy), Henry Woronicz (Father Curtis), Monica Lacey (Julie), Ali Marsh (Karen), Virginia Watson (Nun), Walter Franks (Waiter), Jerry Maren (Dad)
George's girlfriend uses the phrase "yada yada" to skip to the end of stories she tells, which George sees as the best part of her stories. Elaine agrees to be a character witness for a friend who's trying to adopt. Kramer and Mickey go on a double date, but have trouble recalling who's dating who. Jerry's dentist converts to Judaism.
154 :08x20 - The Millennium
Writer: Jennifer Crittenden
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Wayne Knight (Newman), Richard Herd (Wilhelm), Louan Gideon (Mrs. Hamilton), Lauren Graham (Valerie), Victoria Mahoney (Gladys), Michael Laskin (Minkler), Bruce Jarchow (Mooney), Maria Cina (Saleswoman)
Kramer and Newman both plan parties to celebrate the new millennium, Kraminnium and Newmanium, respectively. Kramer and Elaine team up to hurt business at a clothing store. George thinks that the Mets have a job for him, so he tries his best to get fired. But Steinbrenner thinks that George was offered a job with Tyson chicken, so he negotiates a deal to keep George. Meanwhile, Jerry worries about what position his girlfriend put his number on her speed dial.
155 :08x21 - The Muffin Tops
Writer: Spike Feresten
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Wayne Knight (Newman), John O'Hurley (J. Peterman), Richard Fancy (Lippman), Rena Sofer (Mary Anne), Melinda Clarke (Alex), Chaim Jeraffi (Jiffy Dump Guy), Sonya Eddy (Rebecca), Barry Kramer (Bag Guy), Elayn Taylor (Book Fan), Paige Moss (Girl), Viola Kates Stimpson (Old Woman), Jack Riley (Rider), Bunny Summers (Rider), Earl Carroll (Rider), Norman Brenner (Rider), Reuven Bar-Yotam (Foreign Guy), Vince Donvito (Passerby), Chris Burmester (Passerby), Deck McKenzie (Man), Victoria Fischer (Bartender), Keith Sellon-Wright (Guy), Larry David (George Steinbrenner)
A muffin shop starts selling the tops of muffins, but runs into problems when the muffin bottoms begin to pile up. Kramer tries to get rid of the bottoms for the shop, but is turned down by everyone he offers them to. Jerry decides to shave his chest, but is warned by Kramer not to do so. Kramer gives a tourist a tour of Peterman's life and has Jerry come along. Meanwhile, Elaine helps solve the muffin bottom problem.
156 :08x22 - The Summer of George
Writer: Jeff Schaffer, Alec Berg
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Neil Flynn (Cop #1), Joe Urla (Dugan), Victor Raider-Wexler (Doctor), Lauren Bowles (Waitress), John O'Hurley (J. Peterman), Raquel Welch (Herself), Molly Shannon (Sam), Amanda Peet (Lanette), Peter Dennis (Lew), Tucker Smallwood (Malcolm), Wayne Wilderson (Walter), Blake Gibbons (Lyle), Adrian Sparks (Man), Jane A. Johnston (Woman), Sue Goodman (Clerk), Tom Michael Bailey (Cop #2), Denise Bessette (Therapist)
George finds out that his severance pay will last him 3 months, enough to pay for a relaxing summer of no work. Jerry is invited to the Tony Awards, and Kramer sneaks into the event. He sits in Raquel Welch's seat and has to accept an award for her. Elaine comments that a co-worker walks like a stiff, and her co-workers hopes that it will cause a cat fight.
157 :09x01 - The Butter Shave
Writer: Alec Berg, Jeff Schaffer, David Mandel
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Wayne Knight (Newman), Steve Hytner (Kenny Bania), Patrick Warburton (David Puddy), Kristin Davis (Jenna), Gordon Jump (Mr. Thomassoulo), Everett Greenbaum (McMaines), Connie Sawyer (Old Woman), Matthew Fonda (NBC Executive), Chris Parnell (NBC Executive), Frank Van Keeken (Vegetable Lasagna), Shannon Whirry (Cute Girl), Nancy Balbirer (Woman), Erica Y. Becoat (Stewardess), Torsten Voges (Cab Driver), George Georgiadis (Cab Driver), Brian Callaway (Passenger)
Kenny Bania, Jerry's rival, continues to take Jerry's past material, and even starts dating one of Jerry's ex-girlfriends. To change this, Jerry decides to do badly in one of his acts so Kenny will do bad as well. But Jerry's plan completely backfires. Kramer starts shaving using butter and starts roasting himself in a sauna. Newman sees him as a giant turkey and chases him around. Meanwhile, Elaine and Puddy travel to Europe together, and George tries to hide that he's a closet Bania fan.
158 :09x02 - The Voice
Writer: Jeff Schaffer, David Mandel, Alec Berg
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Jarrad Paul (Darin), Patrick Warburton (David Puddy), Gordon Jump (Mr. Thomassoulo), Sara Rose Peterson (Claire), Ella Joyce (Dean Jones), Nancy Balbirer (Alice), Brian J. Williams (Glenn), Cindy Lu (Worker)
George's co-workers find out that he's faking his handicap and they no longer treat him special. George has a contract, so he can't be fired, but everyone tries their best to get him to quit. Jerry and George mock Jerry's new girlfriend, Claire, whose stomach makes strange noises. They do so with an accented "hello", which is referred to as the voice. Jerry bets Elaine that she'll get back together with Puddy and Kramer gets an intern to help him with Kramerica.
159 :09x03 - The Serenity Now
Writer: Steve Koren
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Jerry Stiller (Frank Costanza), Estelle Harris (Estelle Costanza), Lori Loughlin (Patty), Ross Malinger (Adam), Matt McCoy (Lloyd Braun), Bruce Mahler (Rabbi Glickman), Richard Fancy (Mr. Lippman)
Frank begins to use the phrase "serenity now" every time he feels his blood pressure rising. Elaine is invited to a bar mitzvah for her boss's son and is French kissed by the son. George begins to work as a computer salesman, but isn't good at selling them to other people. Jerry's girlfriend gives Knicks tickets away, which makes Jerry mad, but he doesn't show it. His girlfriend comments that he never gets angry, so Jerry attempts to show his anger.
160 :09x04 - The Blood
Writer: Daniel O'Keefe
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Wayne Knight (Newman), Barney Martin (Morty Seinfeld), Liz Sheridan (Helen Seinfeld), Kellie Waymire (Vivian), Audrey Kissel (Tara), Colton James (Jimmy), Gene Dynarski (Izzy Jr.), Yvonne Farrow (Employee), Lloyd Bridges (Izzy)
Jerry's parents hire a personal trainer for him. However, the trainer is very old and ends up throwing out his back. Kramer begins stocking up on his own blood, but runs into refrigeration problems. George decides that if he could combine sex and food, he would have the perfect life. Elaine's friend thinks Elaine is too irresponsible to watch her son but tries to prove her friend wrong. But when babysitting is more than Elaine bargained for, she tries to show that she is irresponsible to get out of it.
161 :09x05 - The Junk Mail
Writer: Spike Feresten
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Toby Huss (Jack), Richard Kuhlman (Man), Wayne Knight (Newman), Jerry Stiller (Frank Costanza), Estelle Harris (Estelle Costanza), Patrick Warburton (David Puddy), Laurie Taylor-Williams (Rhisa), Dana Gould (Frankie), Montrose Hagins (Old Woman (Betty)), Peggy Blow (Mail Clerk), Clement E. Blake (Dirt Person #1), D. A. Johnson (Dirt Person #2), Wilford Brimley (Postmaster General Henry Atkins)
Kramer gets disgusted with all of the junk mail he receives, so he closes off his mailbox and forwards all of his mail to Jerry's box. Jerry has a show to help a car dealership owned by "Fragile" Frankie, and is given a van for his help. Meanwhile, George thinks his parents are avoiding him, and Elaine tries to get Puddy back.
162 :09x06 - The Merv Griffin Show
Writer: Bruce Eric Kaplan
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Arabella Field (Miranda), Wayne Knight (Newman), John O'Hurley (J. Peterman), Jerry Stiller (Frank Costanza), Estelle Harris (Estelle Costanza), Rick Hall (Vet), Brent Hinkley (Lou), Julia Pennington (Celia), Jim Fowler (Himself)
Kramer finds part of a Merv Griffin Show set in a dumpster. He sets the pieces up in his apartment and creates his own show, featuring him as a host. Jerry's girlfriend collects old toys and refuses to let anyone play with them. George hits a squirrel and his girlfriend has him take the squirrel to the vet. Meanwhile, Elaine has to deal with an annoying co-worker.
163 :09x07 - The Slicer
Writer: Gregg Kavet, Andy Robin
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Marcia Cross (Dr. Sara Seredes), Daniel Von Bargen (Kruger), Larry B. Scott (Arthur Milano), David Moreland (Mr. Parry)
Elaine's neighbor is out of the country and left her alarm set to go off at 3:30 am. Kramer buys a meat slicer, and Elaine breaks it when he lets her borrow it. Jerry's new girlfriend is a doctor who only talks about healing people. George gets a new job and realizes that he knows the boss from somewhere.
164 :09x08 - The Betrayal
Writer: Peter Mehlman, David Mandel
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Wayne Knight (Newman), Heidi Swedberg (Susan), Brenda Strong (Sue Ellen), Michael McShane (FDR (Franklin Delano Romanosky)), Justine Miceli (Nina), Bart Braverman (Zubin), Shaun Toub (Pinter), Noor Shic (Usha), Jocelyne Kelly (Model), Brian Kaiser (Postman), Shelley Malil (Usher), Bill Lee Brown (Partygoer)
In an episode told backwards, Jerry, George and Elaine return home from their India trip and they don't want to talk about the trip or even talk to each other. George finds out that Jerry slept with his girlfriend and to compensate, George wants to sleep with Elaine. Elaine tells everyone that she once slept with Sue Ellen's fiance, which causes Sue Ellen to call off the wedding.
165 :09x09 - The Apology
Writer: Jennifer Crittenden
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: James Spader (Jason "Stanky" Hanky), John O'Hurley (J. Peterman), Patrick Warburton (David Puddy), Megan Cole (Peggy), Kathleen McClellan (Melissa), Jack Hackett (Alan), Michael Fishman (Gregg), David Dunard (Leader), Wayne Wilderson (Walter), Brian Levinson (Andy), Eric Simonson (Friend)
George demands an apology from a recovering alcoholic for a comment he once made about one of George's sweaters. Jerry's new girlfriend does everything in the nude, leading Jerry and George to debate whether or not there is a bad nude. Kramer thinks he's spending too much time in the shower and goes to Jerry for advice on how to take less time. Meanwhile, Elaine is at odds with a co-worker, Peggy, who gets mad at Elaine for touching her water.
166 :09x10 - The Strike
Writer: Jeff Schaffer, Alec Berg, Daniel O'Keefe
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Jerry Stiller (Frank Costanza), Estelle Harris (Estelle Costanza), Bryan Cranston (Whatley), Daniel Von Bargen (Kruger), Karen Fineman (Gwen), Kevin McDonald (Denim Vest), Tracy Letts (Counterguy), Amit Itelman (Employee), Stacey Herring (Sandy), Colin Malone (Sleazy Guy), Jerry Dixon (Customer), Suzanne Krull (Gwen), Dave Florek (Harry)
Jerry's girlfriend, Gwen, looks either ugly or beautiful depending on what type of light she is in. At a Hanukkah party, George receives a donation made to a charity in his name as a gift. George sees this as an opportunity to not have to give out gifts, and sets up a fictitious charity, "The Human Fund", which he makes donations to on behalf of his co-workers for their gifts. However, George is found out, resulting in the story of Festivus. Meanwhile, Kramer resumes working at a bagel shop after a 12 year strike.
167 :09x11 - The Dealership
Writer: Steve Koren
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Patrick Warburton (David Puddy), Daniel Hagen (Rick), Joel McCrary (Don), Michael Kagan (Willie), Dee Freeman (Service Assistant), Rif Hutton (Salesman), Howard Mann (Willie Sr.), Steve Susskind (Customer #1), Loretta Fox (Customer #2), Catherine Schreiber (Saleswoman)
Puddy is promoted from a mechanic to a car salesman, so Jerry tries to use Puddy to get a good deal on a new car. But when Elaine and Puddy get into a fight, Jerry tries to get them back together so he can get his good deal. At the dealership, George tries to get a twinkie, but the vending machine won't take his dollar. Meanwhile, Kramer test drives a car and pushes it to the limit to see if it can handle a day in the life of Kramer.
168 :09x12 - The Reverse Peephole
Writer: Spike Feresten
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Lauren Bowles (Waitress), Wayne Knight (Newman), Patrick Warburton (David Puddy), Jon Polito (Silvio), Pat Finn (Joe Mayo), Jennette Robbins (Keri), Fitzhugh G. Houston (Cop), Joe Basile (Delivery Guy)
Newman and Kramer switch peepholes so they'll have a different view on the world. George buys a large wallet and keeps all of his receipts in it, but ends up putting one too many receipts in it. Elaine tries to get Jerry to use a Carry-All, or a mens' purse. Puddy starts wearing a large fur coat, which Elaine hates.
169 :09x13 - The Cartoon
Writer: Bruce Eric Kaplan
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Kathy Griffin (Sally Weaver), Joe Urla (Dugan), Wayne Knight (Newman), John O'Hurley (J. Peterman), Paul Benedict (Mr. Elinoff), Tracy Nelson (Janet), Bart McCarthy (Cab Driver)
Elaine comes across a cartoon in the New Yorker, but can't figure out why it's funny. She then becomes determined to get her comic published. Kramer's honesty gets Jerry in trouble with Sally, an old friend of Elaine's, and she begins to do stand-up about how mean Jerry is. George's new girlfriend looks like Jerry, but he refuses to believe it.
170 :09x14 - The Strongbox
Writer: Daniel O'Keefe
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Illeana Douglas (Loretta), Alex Kapp Horner (Maura), Louis Mustillo (Phil), Nicholas Paul Walker (Glenn), Mary Scheer (Ms. Smoth), Bonnie McNeil (Alison), Rosie Malek-Yonan (Wife)
Kramer buys a strongbox to keep his valuable belongings in. But when it comes time to hide the key, Kramer has a hard time deciding where to put it. Elaine finds a new boyfriend who becomes a big mystery to her, until she finds out why he likes to hide in dark corners every so often. George's girlfriend won't let him breakup with her, so George goes to great lengths to do so. Jerry goes with Kramer to a pet cemetery to retrieve Kramer's strongbox key from a parrot that ate it and died.
171 :09x15 - The Wizard
Writer: Steve Lookner
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Grace Zabriskie (Mrs. Ross), Warren Frost (Mr. Ross), Liz Sheridan (Helen Seinfeld), Barney Martin (Morty Seinfeld), Samuel Bliss Cooper (Darryl), Edgar Small (Sid Luckman), Vic Helford (Tom), Michael McShane (Franklin Delano Romanosky (FDR)), Bahni Turpin (Waitress #1), Constance Zimmer (Waitress #2), Jeanette Miller (Old Woman), Murray Rubin (Rubin)
Jerry buys a $200 pocket Wizard organizer. Kramer moves to Del Boca Vista, deciding that he's ready to retire. Together, Kramer and Morty plot to get Kramer elected president of the condo. To do so, they give each voter a cheap version of a Wizard, known as a Willard. Back in New York, Elaine tries to figure out the race of her boyfriend, and George tries his best to get out of a foundation meeting.
172 :09x16 - The Burning
Writer: Jennifer Crittenden
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Brian Posehn (Artie), Patrick Warburton (David Puddy), Danny Woodburn (Mickey Abbott), Daniel Dae Kim (Student #1), Daniel Von Bargen (Kruger), Cindy Ambuehl (Sophie), Henry Woronicz (Father Curtis), Ursaline Bryant (Dr. Wexler), Alex Craig Mann (Student #2), Alec Holland (Co-Worker #1), Suli McCullough (Co-Worker #2)
George begins to end conversations early so he doesn't end up saying something stupid. Jerry overhears his girlfriend talking about "the tractor story", and George and Jerry wonder what the story might entail. Kramer and Mickey volunteer to fake illnesses so medical students can diagnose them. Elaine sees a "Jesus fish" on Puddy's car and wonders if he's religious.
173 :09x17 - The Bookstore
Writer: Spike Feresten, Darin Henry, Marc Jaffe
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Merrin Dungey (Cashier), Lauren Bowles (Waitress), Wayne Knight (Newman), Barney Martin (Morty Seinfeld), Liz Sheridan (Helen Seinfeld), John O'Hurley (J. Peterman), Len Lesser (Uncle Leo), Jon Gries (Rusty), Jonathan Penner (Zach), Ted Rooney (Crichton), Sonya Eddy (Rebecca DeMornay), Kevin Ruf (Security Guard), Heather Morgan (Server), Mark Daniel Cade (Walter), Sloppy Joe (Hobo Joe)
Jerry and George spend time at a bookstore in order to meet women. There, George takes a book to read into the bathroom, and is forced to buy it. Jerry sees Uncle Leo shoplifting, and tells his family about what he saw. Kramer and Newman start their own rickshaw business. While drunk, Elaine makes out with a co-worker, then makes up a story about dating him to avoid trouble at the office.
174 :09x18 - The Frogger
Writer: Andy Robin, Gregg Kavet
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Drake Bell (Kenny), John O'Hurley (J. Peterman), Julia Campbell (Lisi), Peter Stormare (Slippery Pete), Reuven Bar-Yotam (Shlomo), Sam Shamshak (Sal), Wayne Wilderson (Walter), Mark Daniel Cade (Other Walter), Jack Esformes (Mike), Melissa Denton (Kobe), Oliver Muirhead (Lubeck)
At a pizza parlor, Jerry and George see an old Frogger game that George used to play. He finds out that he still has the high score on the game, and attempts to save the game, with the help of Kramer, when he learns that the parlor is being torn down. Elaine finds a piece of cake in Peterman's refrigerator that was from King Edward VIII's wedding. She ends up eating the cake, then attempts to replace it with another similar looking cake.
175 :09x19 - The Maid
Writer: David Mandel, Alec Berg, Jeff Schaffer
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: Sam Whipple (Phone Guy #1), Davenia McFadden (Coco), Daniel Von Bargen (Kruger), Angela Featherstone (Cindy), Anthony Crivello (Maxwell), Markus Flanagan (Charles), Kyle Colerider-Krugh (Phone Guy #2), Steve Franken (Brendan), Damon Jones (Watkins), Chip Chinery (Co-Worker #1), Colin McClean (Co-Worker #2), Anthony Mangano (Fireman)
Everyone George works with has a nickname, so he decides he wants to be called T-Bone. However, his idea backfires when his co-workers start calling another guy T-Bone. Kramer's girlfriend moves to downtown New York, so he now has to have a long-distance relationship with her. Elaine tries to get a new phone number, but gets a new area code as well. Jerry hires a maid, Cindy, and begins to date her as well. But soon she demands payment even if she doesn't clean the apartment.
176 :09x20 - The Puerto Rican Day
Writer: Jeff Schaffer, Andy Robin, Daniel O'Keefe, David Mandel, Steve Koren, Gregg Kavet, Bruce Eric Kaplan, Jennifer Crittenden, Alec Berg
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: James Karen (Mr. Canterman), John Paragon (Cedric), Bert Rosario (Man), Helen Carey (Mrs. Christine Nyhart), Mario Joyner (Lamar), Dayton Callie (Cabbie), Yul Vazquez (Bob), Jenica Bergere (Leslie), Monica Allison (Gail), Marcelo Tubert (Father), Armando Molina (Amigo), Tom Agna (Gary), Tom Dahlgren (Priest), Raoul N. Rizik (Parade Goer), Scott Conte (Sketch Guy), Mimi Cozzens (Mrs. Canterman), Alison Martin (Lucy), Marc Hirschfeld (Ellis), Chip Heller (Policeman)
At a Mets game, Elaine, George, Jerry, and Kramer decide to leave in the 8th inning since the Mets are losing 8 to 0. However, they have a tough time getting home due to a Puerto Rican Day parade. George is taunted by a man with a laser pointer. Kramer accidentally sets the Puerto Rican flag on fire and is mobbed by a group of people.
177 :09x21 - The Clip Show (1) (a.k.a. The Chronicle (1))
A look back on relationships, break ups, and other clips from the past nine seasons of Seinfeld.
178 :09x22 - The Clip Show (2) (a.k.a. The Chronicle (2))
Part two of looking back on the past nine seasons of Seinfeld including bloopers.
179 :09x23 - The Finale (1)
Writer: Larry David
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: James Pickens, Jr. (Det. Hudson), Geoffrey C. Ewing (Bailiff), Jane Leeves (Marla Penny), Warren Frost (Mr. Ross), Victor Raider-Wexler (Dr. Wexler), Grace Zabriskie (Mrs. Ross), Wayne Knight (Newman), Jerry Stiller (Frank Costanza), Estelle Harris (Estelle Costanza), Liz Sheridan (Helen Seinfeld), Barney Martin (Morty Seinfeld), Steve Hytner (Kenny Bania), Len Lesser (Uncle Leo), Phil Morris (Jackie Chiles), John O'Hurley (J. Peterman), Patrick Warburton (David Puddy), Danny Woodburn (Mickey Abbott), Larry David (Prison Heckler), Peter Blood (Jay Crespi), David Byrd (Pharmacist), Steve Carlson (Captain Maddox), David Dunard (Guard), Donna Evans (Woman), Keith Hernandez (Himself), Scott Jaeck (Officer Vogel), Wendle Josepher (Susie), Robert Katims (Mr. Deensfrei), Scott Klace (Guard), Bruce Mahler (Rabbi Glickman), Ed O'Ross (Detective Blake), Kevin Page (Stu Chermak), John Pinette (Howie), James Rebhorn (D.A. Hoyt), Peter Riegert (Kimbrough), Geraldo Rivera (Himself), McNally Sagal (Carol), Gay Thomas (O'Neal), Myra Turley (Forewoman), Jane Wells (Herself), Van Epperson (Passerby), Jeff Johnson (Criminal), Sean Moran (Man), Dianne Turley Travis (Receptionist), Jim Zulevic (Bernie), Maggie Egan (Ticket Clerk), Shawn Lockie (Secretary (uncredited))
In part one of the finale, the gang find out that the pilot for Jerry's show has been approved and 13 episodes were ordered. NBC lends the foursome a jet to use before they have to move to California for the show, and they decide to go to Paris. While in the air, Kramer tries to get water out of his ear, but ends up stumbling into cockpit, sending the plane into a dive. The plane has to land, and on the ground, the gang sees a robbery, but don't attempt to help, so they are arrested. Several characters travel to their trial, including Jerry's parents, Peterman, Puddy, Newman, and others.
180 :09x24 - The Finale (2)
Writer: Larry David
Director: Andy Ackerman
Guest star: James Pickens, Jr. (Det. Hudson), Geoffrey C. Ewing (Bailiff), Warren Frost (Mr. Ross), Jane Leeves (Marla), Victor Raider-Wexler (Mr. Wexler), Grace Zabriskie (Mrs. Ross), Wayne Knight (Newman), Jerry Stiller (Frank Costanza), Estelle Harris (Estelle Costanza), Liz Sheridan (Helen Seinfeld), Barney Martin (Morty Seinfeld), Ian Abercrombie (Mr. Justin Pitt), Steve Hytner (Kenny Bania), Len Lesser (Uncle Leo), Phil Morris (Jackie Chiles), John O'Hurley (J. Peterman), Patrick Warburton (David Puddy), Danny Woodburn (Mickey Abbott), Richard Herd (Wilhelm), Stanley Anderson (Judge Vandelay), Frances Bay (Mrs. Choate), Peter Blood (Jay Crespi), David Byrd (Pharmacist), Tony Carlin (Co-Worker), Steve Carlson (Captain Maddox), Brian Doyle-Murray (Mel Sanger), David Dunard (Guard), Brian George (Babu Bhatt), Philip Baker Hall (Mr. Bookman), Teri Hatcher (Sidra), John Hayman (Bubble Boy), Keith Hernandez (Himself), Carlos Jacott (Pool Guy), Scott Jaeck (Officer Vogel), Wendle Josepher (Susie), Robert Katims (Mr. Deensfrei), Scott Klace (Guard), Bruce Mahler (Rabbi Glickman), Wendel Meldrum (Low-Talker), Sheree North (Babs Kramer), Ed O'Ross (Detective Blake), Kevin Page (Stu Chermak), John Pinette (Howie), James Rebhorn (D.A. Hoyt), Geraldo Rivera (Himself), McNally Sagal (Carol), Miguel Sandoval (Marcelino), Reni Santoni (Poppie), Gay Thomas (O'Neal), Myra Turley (Forewoman), Jane Wells (Herself), Van Epperson (Passerby), Dianne Turley Travis (Receptionist), Jim Zulevic (Bernie), Maggie Egan (Ticket Clerk), Larry Thomas (Soup Nazi)
In part two of the finale, several character witnesses are called to the stand in George, Elaine, Jerry, and Kramer's trial. The bubble boy, Marla, the virgin, Mr. Bookman, Sidra, the old woman Jerry mugged, and several others give testimonies. Estelle Costanza tries to bribe the judge to get George out of trouble. The jury finally returns with a verdict, but the foursome aren't remorseful for doing nothing. The series closes the same it began, with Jerry commenting about the second button on George's shirt.
The "Seinfeld" Story
Writer: Jerry Seinfeld, Darin Henry, Spike Feresten
Director: Morgan Sackett
Guest star: Rob Reiner (Himself), Larry David (Himself), George Shapiro (Himself), Howard West (Himself), Rick Ludwin (Himself), Warren Littlefield (Himself), Marc Hirschfeld (Himself), Kenny Kramer (Himself), Jerry Seinfeld (Himself), Jason Alexander (Himself), Michael Richards (Himself), Julia Louis-Dreyfus (Herself)
The "Seinfeld" Story is an NBC special in which Jerry takes questions from the audience while doing a stand-up act. When one audience member asks where the series came from, Jerry shows the crowd a videotape which included the early production of the show, and the people involved in that production. Each main cast member talks about the first seasons of the show and the episodes that were turning points in the show's success. Throughout the show, there are several clips and bloopers from Seinfeld's beginnings.