Carrie: When you're a teenager, all you want to do is buy beer. But once you hit 30 all you want to do is to get carded.
Psychiatrist: One client rather whimsically dubbed his anus "the chocolate starfish."
Trey: Are you quite sure you went to Yale?
Samantha: Are you in pain? I'm in pain just looking at you.
Miranda: I'm a 34-year-old woman with braces and I'm on a liquid diet. Pain doesn't begin to cover it.
Carrie: So are you saying there's no way you'd go out with a guy who lived with his family?
Samantha: Well ... maybe Prince William.
Carrie's answering machine recording: Hi. I'm not here but my shoes are, so leave them a message.