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Jared Has Aides - Recap

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The episode begins with the boys prank calling the owner of City Wok Chinese Restaurant. The boys are amused by his Chinese accent and continue to call him until he realizes it's a prank. Meanwhile, Jared Fogle pays a visit to South Park. He is greeted like a hero and he gives a speech to the townspeople about his views on weight loss. Afterward, the boys go to speak to Jared. He tells them that it isn't JUST eat Subway that helped him lose weight, he also got aides. The boys are shocked, thinking he meant that he had AIDS, but explains that he hired a personal trainer and a dietician. They breathe a sigh of relief, understanding. Jared begins to believe that maybe he should tell everyone the entire truth about his weight loss.

Jared first tells his fiance that his weight loss was quicker due to his having aides. She misunderstands, but never gives him a chance to explain himself, and she leaves horrified, believing that Jared has AIDS. This begins a running gag throughout the episode in which whenever Jared says he has aides, everyone takes it to mean that he has AIDS, and Jared doesn't correct them. He tells the people of South Park about his aides, and they think that he is sick and crazy. Subway fires Jared because of his having AIDS.

The boys get an idea to make a deal with the owner of City Wok that Butters will get really fat, and then lose all of the weight by eating nothing but City Wok. Once Butters is then again, City Wok will get more business, and the boys will have free City Wok for life. The plan doesn't go well, as Butters can't lose the weight. They decide to perform liposuction on Butters, however Mr. and Mrs. Stotch come home during the procedure. The boys bail, and Butters is left lying on the couch groggy with a tube in his stomach and stomach fluids everywhere. His parents ground him telling him they warned him not to do self-performed liposuction in the house.

Jared begins to think that the reason everyone is mad at him is because they themselves can't afford aides so he hold another press conference. He claims that he is going to see to it that everyone gets aides, and he is going to give the children aides personally. Jared is then chased through town by the angry mob of townspeople who consider him a sick weirdo.

The boys sneak Butters out of his house to go to City Wok, while Cartman stays at home to answer the phone at Butters in case his parents call. The City Wok owner decides he no longer wants a "Jared-like" spokesperson since Jared is no longer popular. Meanwhile, back at Butters' house, Mr. and Mrs. Stotch call and Cartman promptly cusses them out in his Butters voice.

We now see that the villagers have captured Jared and tied him up. Kyle then arrives to explain the verbal mistake that everyone has been making throughout the episode. They all understand and laugh about it, declaring that AIDS is finally funny. Jared is once again a hero, and Tuong Lu Kim pays the boys $15 to use Butters in advertising. They are disappointed at the small earnings they make, but they accept. Butters then heads home and thanks Cartman for covering for him. His parents come home furious about what was said on the phone and beat him. Cartman is sitting in the front yard listening and enjoying the show.



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Warning: South Park season 6 episode 1 guide may contain spoilers
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