The episode begins with the three boys playing Lord of the Rings. Stan's parents have rented the movie itself for Stan, and they tell the boys to take it to Butters' house so he can borrow it. The boys pretend they are on a "quest" and they set off. Meanwhile, Randy and Sharon try to watch a porno film called Backdoor Sluts 9
. They are stunned when they see that the movie they have is Lord of the Rings, meaning that they gave the boys the porno. In a panic, they drive to Butters' house, meeting the boys along the way. The boys say they've already given Butters the movie, so Randy tells the boys to go on another quest to get BACK the movie, claiming there's an evil power on it. The boys excitedly head back to get the movie. They arrive at the Stotch house to find Butters already watching it and quite traumatized. The boys take the movie but Butters begs them to let him keep it. Seeing the movie has made Butters slightly insane and he begins acting like the character Gollum. The Marshes are extremely worried, so they call the other parents and the adults in town all go out looking for the boys...Read the full recap
Gerald: 'Back Door Sluts 9' makes 'Crotch Capers 3' look like 'Naughty Nurses 2'.
Randy: Oh yeah! (turns on the video)
Narrator: The story begins in ages past, in the deep regions of Middle Earth, where Scorn first thrived in the kingdom of Gelgelar.
Randy: Aww man, I hate when pornos try to have a story.
Token's Mom: Token? Did the boys come over and... show you a movie? (Token doesn't answer)
Steve: Token? (silence) All right, Token. We know you must be very confused about what you saw. (Token still says nothing)
Randy: (kneels beside Token) Yes, uh... you see, Token, that was called a pornographic film. Uh, i-it shows adult men and adult women having sexual intercourse. (Token still doesn't respond) Well, y-you see, when a, when a man and a woman fall in love, the man puts his penis in the woman's vagina. It's called lovemaking, and it's part of being in love.
Token: (pauses) And when the woman has four penises in her at the same time, then stands over the men and pees on them, is that part of being in love too? (pause) Five midgets, spanking a man... covered in Thousand Island dressing. Is that making love?
Randy: Alright, now, now listen, kids. There's some things we need to put into context for you. You see, a man puts his penis into a woman's vagina for both love and pleasure. But sometimes the woman lays on top of the man facing the other way so that they can put each other's genitals in their mouths. Uh, this is called "sixty-nining" and it's normal.
Sharon: See boys, a woman is sensitive in her vagina and it feels good to have a man's penis inside of it.
Sheila: That's right, but sometimes a woman chooses to use other things. Telephones, staplers, magazines. It's because the nerve endings in the vagina are so sensitive, it's like a fun tickle.
Gerald: Now, onto double penetration, boys. You see, sometimes when a woman has sex with more than one man, each man makes love to a different orifice.
Randy: That's right. It's something adults can do with really good friends in a comfortable setting.
Sheila: It's also important that you understand why some people choose to urinate on each other.
Randy: Going number 1 or number 2 on your lover is something people might do, but you must make sure your partner is okay with it before you start doing it.
Gerald: Okay boys. Do you have any questions?
Uh, boys, Butters' parents want to borrow the Lord of the Rings
video we rented. Could you take it over to them?
The title of this episode, the video the parents rented, and the speech patterns the boys use throughout the episode are references to the popular saga The Lord of the Rings
, written by J. R. R. Tolkien
We're playing Harry Potter.
Harry Potter is a boy wizard character created by British author J.K. Rowling
. He appears in a series of fantasy novels, the first of which was released in 1997, titled Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone
. It is called Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone
in the U.S.