Episode Quotes
Marta: There's nothing the matter with me! Can't you see just by looking at me ? Can't you tell by listening?
Spock: She sounds rational enough, Captain.
Marta: I am rational.
Kirk: Garth, do you have to make him suffer like that?
Garth of Izar: You will address me by my proper title, Kirk.
Kirk: I'm sorry. I should've said Captain Garth.
Garth of Izar: I am Lord Garth, formerly of Izar, and I lead the future masters of the universe.
McCoy: How can we be powerful enough to wipe out a planet and still be so helpless?
Garth of Izar: You and Mr. Spock are to be my guests.
Kirk: Where is Mr. Spock?
Garth of Izar: Right here. Marta!
Marta: Why can't I blow off Just one of his ears ?
Garth of Izar: Stop that, Marta. Mr. Spock will think we're lacking in hospitality.
Garth of Izar: I may have you beaten to death.
Marta: No, you won't, because I am the most beautiful woman on this planet.
Garth of Izar: You're the only woman on this planet, you stupid cow.
Marta: Well, I'm the most beautiful woman in this galaxy!
Garth of Izar: You're repulsive!
Marta: I'm beautiful! And I'm intelligent too. I write poetry, and I paint marvelous pictures. And I am a wonderful dancer.
Garth of Izar: Lies! All lies! You are the greatest liar I have ever met! Let me hear one poem you've written.
Marta: If you like. "Shall I compare thee to a summer's day? Thou art more lovely and more temperate. Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May, and summer's lease hath all too soon..."
Garth of Izar: You wrote that?
Marta: Yesterday, as a matter of fact.
Garth of Izar: It was written by an Earth man named Shakespeare a long time ago!
Marta: Which does not alter the fact that I wrote it again yesterday!
Garth of Izar: Marta, my dear, won't you dance for our guests? That was not a request. Marvellous, isn't she, Captain?
Kirk: Yes, uh... incredible.
Garth of Izar: What is your reaction, Mr. Spock?
Spock: I find it, mildly interesting and somewhat nostalgic, if I understand the use of that word. Nostalgic. Yes. It is somewhat reminiscent of the dances that Vulcan children do in nursery school. Of course, the children are not so well-coordinated.
Garth of Izar: She's yours if you wish, Captain.
Kirk: Oh, uh... thank you. That's, um... very magnanimous of you.
Garth of Izar: You'll find that I am magnanimous to my friends and merciless to my enemies. And I want both of you to be my friends.
Spock: On what, precisely, is our friendship to be based?
Garth of Izar: Well, upon the firmest of foundations, Mr. Spock--enlightened self-interest. You, Captain, are second only to me as the finest military commander in the galaxy.
Kirk: That's very flattering. I am primarily an explorer now, Captain Garth.
Garth of Izar: And so have I been. I have charted more new worlds than any man in history.
Spock: And tried to destroy Antos IV. Why?
Garth of Izar: Well, I could say because they were actively hostile to the Federation.
Kirk: Yes, you could say, but that would be untrue.
Garth of Izar: Agreed.
Garth of Izar: I am master of the universe, and I must claim my domain.
Kirk: I agree there was a time when war was necessary, and you were our greatest warrior. I studied your victory at Axanar when I was a cadet. in fact, it's still required reading.
Garth of Izar: As well it should be.
Kirk: Very well. But my first visit to Axanar was as a new-fledged cadet on a peace mission.
Garth of Izar: Peace mission! Politicians and weaklings!
Kirk: They were humanitarians and statesmen, and they had a dream--a dream that became a reality and spread throughout the stars, a dream that made Mr. Spock and me brothers.
Garth of Izar: Mr. Spock, do you consider Captain Kirk and yourself brothers?
Spock: Captain Kirk speaks somewhat figuratively and with undue emotion. However, what he says is logical and I do, in fact, agree with it.
Garth of Izar: We, gentlemen, are that elite, and we must take what is rightfully ours from the decadent weaklings that now hold it.
Spock: Captain Garth...
Garth of Izar: Lord Garth!
Spock: As you wish.
Garth of Izar: By the way, I assume you play chess.
Kirk: Occasionally.
Garth of Izar: So do l. How would you respond to Queen to Queen's Level Three?
Kirk: You're aware that there are an infinite number of countermoves.
Garth of Izar: I'm interested in only one.
Kirk: I can't for the life of me imagine which one.
Garth of Izar: "For the life of me" is a phrase well chosen. It could literally come to that.
Kirk: Dead I am of no use to you.
Garth of Izar: But I can make you long for death, beg for death.
Marta: "In the midnight of November, when the dead man's fare is nigh, and the danger in the valley, and the anger in the sky." I wrote that this morning. Do you like it ?
Kirk: Yes, I think it's very good.
Marta: He's my lover and I have to kill him.
Spock: She seems to have worked out an infallible method for assuring permanent male fidelity. Interesting.
Kirk: Captain Garth...
Garth of Izar: Lord Garth!
Kirk: No, sir. Captain Garth, star ship fleet captain. That's an honorable title.
Garth of Izar: And I was the greatest of them all, wasn't I?
Kirk: Yes, you were.
Garth of Izar: Yes.
Kirk: But you're a sick man now, sir.
Garth of Izar: I have never been more healthy.
Kirk: No. No, think. Think back to what you were before the accident that sent you to Antos IV. Try.
Garth of Izar: I can't remember. It's almost as if I had died and was reborn. No, I... I can remember.
Kirk: You were the finest student at the academy, the finest star ship captain. You were the prototype, the model for the rest of us.
Garth of Izar: Yes, I do remember that. It was a great responsibility, but one I was proud to bear.
Kirk: And you bore it well. And the disease that changed you, it's not your fault. And the terrible things you did since then, not truly responsible.
Garth of Izar: I don't want to hear any more. You're weak, - and trying to drain my strength.
Kirk: No, I'm not. I want you to find what you once had,
to go back to the greatness that you've lost, Captain Garth.
Garth of Izar: I am Lord Garth! Master of the universe!
Garth of Izar: On your knees before me! All the others before me have failed. Alexander, Caesar, Napoleon, Hitler, Lee Kuan, Krotus! All of them are dust! But I will triumph! I will make the ultimate conquest !
Kirk: Garth, you have only a handful of men.
Garth of Izar: You do refuse to enter into the spirit of the thing, don't you, Captain? Perhaps you'd like a larger role in the ceremony. You could serve as human sacrifice.
Kirk: No, I wouldn't enjoy that at all.
Garth of Izar: Well, since there is no one mighty enough to perform this ceremony, we'll perform it ourselves.
Kirk: Mr. Spock, um, letting yourself be hit on the head, and I presume you let yourself be hit on the head, is not exactly a method King Solomon would have approved.