Guest Host: Masi Oka
Musical Guest: John Legend (who doesn't appear in the episode)
Ratings: 6.95 million viewers
Cal: There's a loose poisonous snake in the theater?!
Cal: Nothing. It's slang.
Jordan: When did it happen?
Jordan: When did you, you know --
Danny: Fall in love with you?
Jordan: You're not in love with me, so stop saying that.
Danny: I'll be in charge of whom I'm love with, if that's okay?
Jordan: It's not okay.
Danny: Then call the cops.
Jordan: When did you decide this?
Danny: It's not a decision. You're not buying a snow blower.
Jordan: So, when did you --
Danny: The first time I met you.
Jordan: The first time you met me, you hated me. You didn't trust me, you thought I was a network bitch, you thought I was blackmailing you.
Danny: You proved me wrong.
Jordan: So your only recourse was to fall in love with me?
Bevo: Cal, I can go to my place, get him, be back here in 45 minutes. This will all be over.
Cal: Alright, alright get the coyote, to get the ferret, that was sent after the snake, but Bevo here's my question just so I know.
Cal: What goes in after the coyote?
Tom: Kim, you're 20 years-old, right?
Kim: Uh huh.
Tom: Well, just because I'm a little responsible for you tonight, I wanted to tell you that the legal drinking age in California is 21.
Kim: What's the age for taking you back to my hotel room and dancing for you?
Tom: Thank you.