Second Teenage Boy: Ooh, look, it's the evil root cellar, where Satan cans all his vegetables.
Sam: We're not gonna start that crap up again.
Dean: Start what up?
Sam: That prank stuff. It's stupid and it always escalates!
Dean: Ah, what's the matter, Sam? You're afraid ya gonna get a little Nair in your shampoo again, huh?
Sam: All right. Just remember you started it.
Dean: Ho ho, bring it on, baldy!
Dean: Most of those websites wouldn't know a ghost if it bit them in the pursqueeter.
Dean: Looks like old man Murdoch was a bit of a tagger during his time.
Sam: And after his time, too. The reverse cross has been used by Satanists for centuries, but the sigil of sulphur didn't show up in San Francisco until the '60's.
Dean: Exactly why you never get laid.
Harry Spengler: What are you guys doing here?
Dean: What the hell are you doing here?
Ed Zeddemore: Uh, we belong here, we're professionals.
Dean: Professional what?
Harry Spengler: Yeah, so if you guys don't mind, we're trying to conduct a serious scientific investigation, here.
Dean: Oh yeah? What do you got so far?
Ed Zeddemore: Harry, why don't you tell 'em about EMF?
Harry Spengler: Well...
Harry Spengler: Electromagnetic Field. Spectral entities can cause energy fluctuation that can be read with an EMF detector (pulls one out from his bag). Like this bad boy right here. Whoa, whoa. 2.8--wow, it's hot in here.
Dean: So, you guys ever seen a real ghost before?
Ed Zeddemore: Once. We were investigating this old house and we saw a vase fall right off the table.
Harry Spengler: By itself.
Ed Zeddemore: Well, we-we-we didn't actually see it, but we heard it. And something like that, it changes you.
Dean: Hey, Sam, I dare you to take a swig of this.
Sam: What would I do that for?
Dean: I double dare you.
Dean: Man, I hate rats.
Sam: Would you rather it was a ghost?
Sam: What the hell kind of spirit is immune to rock salt?!?
Dean: I thought the legend said that Mordecai only goes after chicks?
Sam: It does.
Dean: All right, well, I mean that explains why it went after you, but why me?
Dean: Why don't you tell us about that house? Without lying through your ass this time.
Dean: People believe in Santa Claus--how come I'm not getting hooked up every Christmas?
Sam: 'Cause you're a bad person.
Ed Zeddemore: Harry, look at me, right here, okay? You are a ghost hunter, okay?
Harry Spengler: I know, but Ed, I've never actually seen a real ghost before. Like a real ghost, like an apparition...
Ed Zeddemore: This stuff right here, this is our ticket to the big time--fame, money, sex... with girls, okay? Be brave, okay... WWBD. What would Buffy do, huh?
Harry Spengler: What would Buffy do. I know, Ed, but she's stronger than me.
Dean: I barely have any skin left on my palm.
Sam: I'm not touching that line with a ten-foot pole.
Sam: That's your solution? Burn the whole damn place to the ground?
Dean: Well, no one will go in anymore.
Sam: It kinda makes you wonder. Of all the things we've hunted, how many existed just because people believed in them?
Sam: I have a confession to make.
Sam: I was the one who called them and told them I was a producer.
Dean: Well, I was the one who put the dead fish in their backseat.