Katie: Corey, Sophia wasn't right for you. What, with her being a lesbian and all.
Corey: Katie, she's not a lesbian, she's bisexual. She's like a vegetarian who likes turkey every now and then.
Margaret: Yeah, my mom stopped telling me what to do when I was 17. Of course, I was living with Jim Morrison.
Corey: Jim Morrison is a god.
Margaret: A god who thought my breasts looked like mushrooms. Beautiful mushrooms.
Corey: Yo, punk rock rooster, 12 o'clock.
Margaret: Oh, Corey, this is --
Tuesday: Did you just make some small-minded, middle-class comment about me, bud? It's about my hair, isn't it?
Tuesday: Okay. So when you go to the barber, what do you ask for? The Blue Lagoon?
Corey: What do you ask for? The stegosaurus?
Corey: Hi, Dad, would it be okay if I quit?
RT: Sure, son, sure. I was gonna fire you, anyway.
Corey: Okay, good night.
Roger: Katie, it's Dynasty shots. You only do a shot when someone gets slapped.
Corey: If she's got the hots for you and all you do is make candles, I must really be a loser.
Roger: You're not a loser, you're more of a ... non-winner.