Sheldon: I won't say that all senior citizens who can't master technology should be publicly flogged, but if we made an example of one or two, it might give the others incentive to try harder.

Sheldon: Consider this unlikely but very plausible scenario. A young woman alone in the big city. Her ridiculous dream of becoming an actress lies shattered about her.
Penny: Hey, wait a minute.
Howard: Well, hang on. Let's see where he's going.
Sheldon: Then it hits her. How is she going to survive? I mean, she has no prospects, no marketable skills. And then one day, she meets a group of geniuses and their friend Howard.
Howard: Hey, I...
Penny: Hang on. Let's see where he's going.
Sheldon: She befriends them, and then lies in wait until they reveal a marketable idea, which she steals and sells to the highest bidder.
Leonard: That is ridiculous.
Sheldon: Oh, is it? Let's see you come up with an explanation as to why this woman hangs out with us all the time.
[Everybody looks at Penny]
Penny: Oh, great. You know what? I've already mooched dinner off you guys. I don't need to listen to this.
Howard: There's your answer: free food.

Sheldon: All right, I suppose I'll go put on my bus pants.
Leonard: What the hell are bus pants?
Sheldon: They are pants one wears over one's regular pants when one sits on bus seats that other people have previously sat on.