Guess Hoe's Coming to Dinner - Recap
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The episode begins with Huey narrating Granddad’s so-called “perfect” life. Granddad has everything, but he still needs to find a woman. After he is done narrating, the scene goes to Granddad listening to an undisciplined child disobeying his mother. This child is yelling at her and throwing jars at her. His mother can do nothing. She is in despair as her child knocks over a shelf. Granddad takes action over this; he gives the mother her belt and signals her to whip him with it. The mother begins whipping her child as the child runs away. The shoppers are pleased.
After Granddad feels good about himself, a very attractive young woman comes over to him. She saw how he helped that mother discipline her child and is very interested in him. Granddad is mesmerized by her looks. She tells him that her name is Krystal. He introduces himself to her. After their encounter, Krystal notices Huey and Riley. She holds out her hand to them. Huey refuses to shake it. Krystal introduces herself. Huey than asks her is she’s a stripper, considering that her name is a stripper’s name. Krystal asks him what he knows about strippers. Huey responds to this by saying he doesn’t know much, but he does know that strippers are usually named after liquor.
Later, Krystal tells them that she loves shopping in rich neighborhoods because there’s much better stuff. At the counter, she reaches into her shopping cart and pulls out a French whipped cream. She tries some out as Granddad is mesmerized yet again. Then he notices all the groceries she is buying. Once all of them are bought, he notices her total: $153.12. Krystal pays it with a big ball of money.
As Krystal and the Freemans leave the store, Krystal tells Granddad that he is such a gentleman for carrying all her bags. As she walks away from him, she turns back and takes a look at him. She asks Granddad if he wants to go on a date with her. Granddad tells her that he has two coupons for Red Lobster. Krystal hesitantly accepts.
As the Freemans head back in their car, Riley remarks to Granddad by reminding him that Krystal was a hoe. Granddad tells him not to cuss. Riley defends himself by saying that he did not cuss; he merely said the word “hoe.” Granddad is angered by this and threatens to go to the backseat to give him a beating. Riley still doesn’t know what the big deal is; he continues to say the word “hoe.” Granddad begins slapping him around in the back as he drives off the road. Huey tells them both to stop or they are going to die. Granddad stops hitting Riley and gets back on the wheel to go back on track. As Granddad goes back on the right side of the road, he tells Riley not to say it again. Riley makes one peep of it and Granddad is back to hitting him. Once again, the car is steered off-track as the scene ends.
The next scene is Granddad getting ready for his date with Krystal. Huey questions him about why a 20-year-old woman would want to go out with him. Granddad tells him that he “laid his game down flat.” Riley tells him that he knows nothing about game. Granddad and Riley have little argument about whether this is true or not. Riley insists that his Granddad knows nothing about “game.” Granddad wishes no to argue anymore and goes on to his date. Riley implores his Granddad not to take Krystal out, but Granddad refuses. The scene ends with Huey looking depressed.
The next scene is Granddad with Krystal on a date. Krystal is enjoying the cheddar biscuits very much. Granddad remarks that he has never seen a woman eat so voraciously, man neither. Krystal tells him that he should bring some cheddar biscuits along with him for Huey and Riley. Granddad jokes by saying if you feed them, they never leave. Krystal disagrees; she would love to baby-sit for them sometimes. As she is talking with him, a waiter comes by. She tells him to excuse her for the moment; she is on a real date.
The next scene is Huey talking to Riley about Granddad. He has never seen him with another woman. There was a time when he was three when he thought he was gay, but he is beginning to believe it is bad luck. Riley is not sure what the big deal is with hoes like Krystal. Huey tells him that hoes are only 20-25% of the women population. Huey and Riley have a discussion about whether going on a date with a woman would make the woman a hoe; Riley argues that paying for them makes them a hoe. Huey is a little confused by this…
Back to the date. Granddad asks what kind of job Krystal works in. She tells him that she works in “sales;” she doesn’t really like to talk about work. She is in a “transitional” period. She wants to find another job. While she and Granddad are discussing this, people look at them in disgust. Krystal tells him that she wants someone to save her from work. Granddad would be happy to be her savior.
Riley and Huey are discussing Granddad’s date with Krystal. Riley claims that once someone goes out with a hoe, there will be hoes everywhere. Huey feels he is overreacting, but Riley thinks otherwise. What if he marries her? What if Krystal ends up being their grandmother? They may have kids and “have a brother or sister that’s half hoe?” Once Huey makes him quiet, Granddad and Krystal return from their date. Krystal compliments Granddad on their home. She sees Huey and Riley and goes to have a seat with them. Then she gets up to go with Granddad to “have some relations.” Huey doesn’t want to believe Riley’s theory, but he may be right.
Afterward, Granddad and Krystal go shopping. His expenses go as high as $3000. He and Krystal continue to buy things while they get closer to each other.
The next scene is Riley and Krystal playing a video game. After Krystal beats him, she begins gloating. Riley accuses her of cheating. As he runs away, Krystal continues to gloat in front of Huey.
Krystal is drinking all of the Freemans’ orange juice. Once she is done, Huey burns the carton and disposes of it. As Granddad walks in while Krystal leaves, Huey tells him that Krystal has to go. Granddad refuses to let her go and tells them to show her some respect. Huey tells him that he knows nothing about her, not even where she works. Granddad explains that she works in sales, but Huey and Riley don’t believe him. Huey questions him; he asks whether or not she ducks under the table when men in purple suits come by. The answer is yes. When Riley asks whether or not she can run very quickly in high heels, the answer is yes. When Huey asks whether or not she questions him about being a cop, Granddad says no. This is when Krystal walks in and asks whether or not he is a cop. She gives him a kiss and leaves them. Granddad explains that he knows Krystal better than them, and that he “had relations” with her the night before. Huey and Riley are disgusted by this. Krystal returns and asks Granddad is he is ready to go shopping again.
The next scene is Huey gazing at all of the things Granddad bought for Krystal. He takes some clothes down to do the laundry. Krystal walks by and places a bra with the pile. This is where Huey confronts her. During his talk, he tells her that he wants her to leave from Granddad’s life. He wants her out because she’s a “lazy hoe.” He doesn’t know why Granddad doesn’t see this; neither does Krystal. She tells him that she cannot leave their household. She wants the life that Huey has. Huey tells her that it’s because he is family. Krystal tells him that she can persuade Granddad to let her stay in ways he can’t imagine.
Huey decides to stalk Krystal and learn more about her secret life. When she goes out to places without Granddad in their car, Huey and Riley hide under a blanket in the backseat. When Krystal reaches her destination, Huey and Riley watch and take snapshots of her giving money to a man in a purple suit. Later, Huey takes snapshots of her walking into a strip club. Then they catch a picture of her running away from the police.
Huey shows these photos to Granddad. When he questions Krystal about it, she tells him that they digitally altered photos of her. Granddad believes her once again. Then the doorbell rings. Riley answers to man in a purple suit. This man tells them that he is a man named A Pimp Named Slickback. He and Granddad have an argument over this name for awhile before A Pimp Named Slickback tells him that he left Krystal at their house. He came over to take her back. Krystal explains to Granddad that A Pimp Named Slickback is her pimp; she’s a hoe. Before taking her back, A Pimp Named Slickback decides to give her a slap. Before he can do that, Granddad takes off his belt and stops the blow. He tells him to wait outside and let Krystal have a minute with him.
Krystal and Granddad have a little chat over this whole hoe ordeal. She tells him that there were man obvious signs of it. Granddad tells her that he doesn’t care what se has done in the past, as long as she is ready to make her life work again. Krystal decides to think about going back to school and work, but first she must get rid of A Pimp Named Slickback. As she gives him a kiss on the lips, Krystal runs over to catch up with A Pimp Named Slickback, he has already begun driving away. As Krystal chases after the car, Granddad, Huey, and Riley go back inside.
That night, Huey goes downstairs to check up on Granddad. He is downstairs waiting for Krystal to come back. Huey decides to keep believing that his Granddad will find someone someday. As the next scene shows Krystal continuing to run after A Pimp Named Slickback, the episode comes to an end.