The scene opens with Dan and Jack catching a meal, when Jack finds Dan’s doughnut-gaucomonut habit weird. However, it charges up Dan with an irritant-like kick and he loves having it. Meanwhile, one of the young cops at the office is setting a new record for the highest number of push-ups. Just as Hodges announces the news, Dan is not game with anyone actually having broken his record. So he puts himself to the test. Dan is straining as soon as he starts, and Samantha points out how the veins on his head suggests he is straining beyond a healthy limit. Jack manages to pull him out of the record bout – they have a case to solve.
When they arrive at Dr. Morris’s house, who likes being called with his title and surname. He tells them about the theft at his place.
He has lost a television set, music system, and most importantly a Mirage painting. As Jack and Dr. Morris discuss the theft, Dan loses vision and collapses. When he wakes up on couch, Dan is right back on the investigation, and refuses to admit he needs special care. The only time a man needs to go to the hospital is when he has been shot – that too not the legs arms or the shoulders. However, after a little coaxing he does agree to be tested at the doctor’s home office. Jack tells Lt. Ruiz about the health risks Dan is facing. However, Dan is still in denial – it is simple indigestion. Nothing is wrong. However Jack points out he will never know until the reports come out. Lt. Ruiz decides to restrict Dan to desk work, and only after the reports come clean, can he go punk hunting.
Before long, Dan is up in arms – desk job? Is Ruiz kidding him? Meanwhile, Rondo Green is giving Dr. Morris a hard time over the $10,000 the doctor owes him. And it is going to be 20, with interests added. The doctor tries pleading Rondo, but gets a couple of hard punches in his stomach. Rondo will start working on selling the painting only when he gets his 20K. Morris keeps pleading – how can he give up that kind of money – he is having a cash flow problem – his wife has nailed him over the divorce lawsuit. Morris visits Angie, pleading her for being easy on the money, but she doesn’t see any problem. Morris should be able to carry on – so what if Rondo wants 20K – it’s just tough talk she is sure.
Morris tries to explain – Rondo hits him. And that goon doesn’t know anything about paintings. Angie tells him so what? He just needs to be able to sell it. Back at the cop office, Dan is lividly kicking around water filters for having to spend his work time at the desk. And besides, he is upset about an unsolved case. It doesn’t matter to Jack, but it does to Dan, and he is hitting the streets. As he yells back and forth about where he ought to be, it doesn’t take long for him to feel dizzy and plunk on the chair. He guesses he ought to be at the desk. Later, Dan shows Jack a list of things he has to do before dying. 1, sleep with Olivia Newton John – she has a new hip, 2, know what is happening between the gorgeous ADA and her partner, and 3, bust one more punk.
Meanwhile, Angie is shopping and Morris cannot but give her grief over all the money he is losing. Before long, Morris realizes he needs to rip off one of his wealthiest patients. Ruiz has decided to replace Dan with Hodges, which Jack finds ridiculous, and Hodges feels no different about having to work with Jack on his side. When they reach Julius’s bar, he doesn’t know about anyone who could be dealing in stolen paintings. Back at the office, Dan is learning how to operate software. Samantha is helping him, and she has also been sweet enough to change Dan’s ring tone to one of his favorite rock numbers. But Dan is not liking it at office one bit when his boss Ruiz brings him healthy food – the kind he hates. Meanwhile, Jack and Hodges are catching their lunch, and it occurs to Jack that the theft may be false – an inside job kind of thing.
However, Hodges argues it looks like a simple burglary to him. Jack calls up Dan, and tells him he needs a favor. Although it is not about getting out on the street to take out some punk, Dan is only too happy to leave his boring desk. On his way out, he drops into ADA Liz’s office, and starts a little flirting. However, it doesn’t seem to be going anywhere. At Dr. Morris’ place, he has called in his rich patient, who has a cigarette in one hand, and an oxygen mask in the other. Morris reminds him of the time when he disagreed to quit his bad habits, and said he would pay whatever it takes to get his health back on track. So Morris now wants $100,000, but the man is ready to pay half a million for a kidney transplant. Morris has also found a ‘ready’ donor – Dan Stark.
Meanwhile, as Dan joins the rest of the team in front of the office, Jack receives a call – it is a heads up on Rondo Green from the barman – Julius – who is also looking at the prospect of becoming a deputy for the detectives. Although excited, Dan cannot go with them because Ruiz is quick to turn up and stop him from going out. Jack and Hodges arrive at Rondo’s place, where he answers the calling machine, but tries to run as soon as Jack reveals his identity. Hodges manages to nab him, only because Rondo fell while hurrying down the emergency stairs. In jail, Rondo calls up Dr. Morris. He has to bail him out, or else!
Later that night, when Dan visits Julius’ bar, he learns that Ruiz has threatened to close the place down if he serves Dan. Before long, arrives hot Angie. She seduces Dan saying she has a thing for men with moustaches, and takes him into her car, where she gets cozy with him, and manages to make him unconscious with a chloroform hanky. The next day, Jack cannot find Dan, and no one is answering his call. Ruiz agrees to send cops to find him, but there is no news, as Dan lies unconscious in the doctor’s underground laboratory. Meanwhile, Rondo has doubled his charges and now wants about $40,000 – extra charges include finder’s fees, and compensation for emotional distress. The doctor is not giving in, and takes a number of blows in his stomach – however, this time he yanks a blow with the billiards cue on Rondo’s head, hard enough to make him unconscious.
As the doctor proceeds to the lab with Rondo’s body, he panics, and Angie gets into an altercation. The loudness is enough to wake up Dan. He opens his eyes, but can barely avoid closing them. Just before the doctor is about to administer an injection, Dan manages to escape, but at the main gate is the rich patient’s hand – with a gun. Morris chases, and the man hits Dan back to unconsciousness. Jack has discovered that the call Rondo made for bail was to Dr. Morris. Jack arrives pretending he is there to give back the painting, but when he asks about the call, Morris is running for cover. Jack enters shooting the locks, and when he arrives at the scene in the basement, he discovers Dan tied to a hospital bed.
He thinks he is dying, but is happy to know he isn’t. His reports are back, and he is perfectly okay – he had toxic ingestion – the digestive pills he was taking expired 20 years ago. Before long, Dan is chasing Morris and Angie out of their house, and lunges himself on them. Back at work, he is happy to dip his doughnuts in gaucomonut – and announces the new push-up champion who broke his long-standing record. Dan declares a treat at the bar – but Hodges is not invited. The episode ends. Written By David Sibert Share this article with your friends