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The American Idol season finale Craig watched earlier cause "we're live" is the focus of tonight's monologue. Noting that the AI finale appears to be a battle between the red states versus the blue states and how that's insane. Later, GUY PEARCE, star of The Hurt Locker is the first guest of the night. Also comedian HATTIE HAYRIDGE performs. And HENSLEY performs a song from his album, Beyond.
Craig: I'm a bit concerned about tonight's studio audience...they may or may not be gay.
Craig: (talking about going to a tanning salon) I tanned my legs...using electricity.
Craig: A great day for the American people, not such a great day for the American dog. Michael Vick was released from prison today, just to be safe Scooby Doo has moved to Canada.
Craig: You know most of the season they tape American Idol right next door here. And people come from everywhere to be apart of that studio audience and if they can't get in there they go to the Price is Right and if they can't get into the Price is Right they get into this show. And if you can't get into this show you are clearly an idiot.
Craig: (talking about the Adam Lambert pics) By the way I've accidently downloaded these pics 500 times already today.
Craig: If dressing like a wood nymph and kissing a guy makes you gay, then uh oh I'm guilty as charged.
Craig: Gay people are not just in the red states or the blue states, they're everywhere, at least they're all around me.
Hattie Hayridge: (talking about her Native Britain) Our motto isn't so much yes we can as more I guess we could but it is gonna be worth it.