Seth: Well, Summer seems to think this Volchok guy is not exactly a beacon of morality.
Marissa: Wow, well aren't you a regular Veronica Mars?
Julie: Vamanos por favor!
Maid: I’m from the Philippines.
Summer: What, are you getting drunk?
Marissa: More like staying drunk.
Summer: You may be Mrs. Cooper-Nichol-Cooper-Roberts, but if you make my dad happy—
Neil: Which she does.
Julie: I do.
Summer: Then I'm happy.
Summer: We have a major problem. Marissa just bailed on our parents' engagement party to skank out with the surf Nazi.
Seth: Your dad and Julie got engaged? You kind of buried the lead there, Summer.
Summer: We've got bigger fish here, Cohen. Marissa is on a slut spiral and we need to stop her.
Seth: So if the body doesn't lie...
Summer: Then it's saying, "Ew."
Seth: "Ew"? Or "Touch my pooper"?
Summer: Volchok is Atwood's kryptonite. He'll totally Hulk out.
Seth: You're mixing comic book metaphors. But you think we can keep Marissa quiet?
Summer: Marissa? She can barely put her words together these days.
Seth: She's usually such a wordsmith.
Summer: What does she see in that guy? He's so dirty and greasy.
Seth: He's got good abs. Women like abs. I got a six-pack myself. I know.
Summer: Cohen, those are your ribs.
Episode Title: The Secrets and Lies
"The Secrets and Lies" comes from the 1996 movie and 2003 TV show, both entitled Secrets and Lies.
Wow, well aren't you just a regular Veronica Mars. Way to solve this weeks mystery!
Veronica Mars is an 18-year old female detective in the hit UPN series, Veronica Mars