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« Season 13   Settings    Season 14 (Printable Guide) Season 15 »
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Season 14
292 :14x01 - Treehouse of Horror XIII (Nov/03/2002)

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Send in the Clones – Homer buys a hammock that can produce clones of himself that he uses to help around the house, but soon the clones (including many irregular mutants, such as an extremely fat Homer, a nerdy Homer, a faceless Homer, and Peter Griffin from Family Guy) overrun the town and must be destroyed.

The Fright to Creep and Scare Harms – Lisa petitions the town to get rid of their firearms after discovering the gravestone of a young man named William Bonney who died from gun violence. What Lisa soon finds out is that "William Bonney" is the real name of the famous Western outlaw Billy the Kid, who, along with Frank and Jesse James, The Sundance Kid, and Kaiser Wilhelm, overrun the defenseless town.

The Island of Dr. Hibbert – Dr. Hibbert is Dr. Moreau who invites all of the citizens of Springfield to his island resort and turns them into animals.
Guest Stars: Tress MacNeille as Various, Maggie Roswell as Maude Flanders, Pamela Hayden as Various, Karl Wiedergott as Various
Director: David Silverman (1)
Writer: Brian Kelley (3), Kevin Curran, Marc Wilmore
 
293 :14x02 - How I Spent My Strummer Vacation (Nov/10/2002)
Homer goes to a rock and roll camp, run by Rolling Stones' band members Mick Jagger and Keith Richards, after Homer confesses on a hidden camera show modeled after HBO's "Taxicab Confessions" that he hates his family and his job.
Guest Stars: Karl Wiedergott as Various, Tress MacNeille as Various, Pamela Hayden as Various, Marcia Wallace as Edna Krabappel, Keith Richards (2) as Himself, Elvis Costello as Himself, Tom Petty as Himself, Brian Setzer (2) as Himself, Mick Jagger as Himself, Lenny Kravitz as Himself
Director: Mike B. Anderson (1)
Writer: Mike Scully
 
294 :14x03 - Bart vs. Lisa vs. 3rd Grade (Nov/17/2002)
Thanks to the results of their latest standardized tests, Lisa is moved up to the third grade for getting the highest score while Bart is sent back for getting the lowest score. Meanwhile, Homer gets satellite TV.
Guest Stars: Tony Bennett as Himself, Marcia Wallace as Edna Krabappel, Tress MacNeille as Various, Karl Wiedergott as Various, Pamela Hayden as Milhouse
Director: Steven Dean Moore (1)
Writer: Tim Long (2)
 
295 :14x04 - Large Marge (Nov/24/2002)
Thinking Homer does not find her attractive anymore, Marge goes to the hospital to get liposuction, but ends up with breast implants meant for Mayor Quimby's female assistant. Meanwhile, Bart and Milhouse accidentally get Krusty in trouble from TV watchdog groups after imitating a stunt shown on a 1960s episode of Batman featuring Krusty as a Joker/Riddler-esque villain.
Guest Stars: Marcia Mitzman-Gaven as Helen Lovejoy, Karl Wiedergott as Various, Tress MacNeille as Cookie Kwan, Lindsay Naegle, Pamela Hayden as Milhouse, Marcia Wallace as Edna Krabappel, Jan Hooks as Manjula, Baha Men as Themselves, Burt Ward as Robin, Adam West as Batman
Director: Jim Reardon
Writer: Ian Maxtone-Graham
 
296 :14x05 - Helter Shelter (Dec/01/2002)
The Simpsons' house is overrun by termites (after Lisa gets a hockey stick from a Russian player) and find another place to live while their home is being fumigated in the form of a reality show where families live the way people did in the 1800s.
Guest Stars: Karl Wiedergott as Various, Russi Taylor as Various, Pamela Hayden as Various, Tress MacNeille as Dolph, Jimbo, Larry Holmes (1) as Himself, David L. Lander (1) as Squiggy
Director: Mark Kirkland
Writer: Mert Rich, Brian Pollack
 
297 :14x06 - The Great Louse Detective (Dec/15/2002)
When the Simpson family go to a free spa weekend, Homer is nearly killed when a mysterious figure locks him in a sauna, prompting Chief Wiggum to hire someone who can think like a murderer in order to find one. Unfortunately, that "someone" is Bart's mortal enemy, Sideshow Bob.
Guest Stars: Pamela Hayden as Various, Tress MacNeille as Dolph, Jimbo, Karl Wiedergott as Various, Kelsey Grammer as Sideshow Bob
Director: Steven Dean Moore (1)
Writer: Don Payne, John Frink
 
298 :14x07 - Special Edna (a.k.a. Love And Marking) (Jan/05/2003)
In a completely out of character move, Bart nominates Mrs. Krabappel for the Teacher of the Year award after the surly fourth grade teacher worries about her relationship with Principal Skinner.
Guest Stars: Russi Taylor as Martin Prince, Pamela Hayden as Milhouse, Karl Wiedergott as Various, Little Richard as Himself, Tress MacNeille as Agnes Skinner, Marcia Wallace as Edna Krabappel
Director: Bob Anderson (1)
Writer: Dennis Snee
 
299 :14x08 - The Dad Who Knew Too Little (Jan/12/2003)
Homer hires a private detective to help him learn more about Lisa after he disappoints her on her birthday with a thoughtless present, but ends up on the run with Lisa when the detective wants his payment.
Guest Stars: Karl Wiedergott as Various, Tress MacNeille as Brandine, Elliott Gould as Himself
Director: Mark Kirkland
Writer: Matt Selman
 
300 :14x09 - The Strong Arms of the Ma (Feb/02/2003)
Marge gets mugged by a crazy man in a Goofy hat and becomes so traumatized that she becomes agoraphobic. To combat it, she begins exercising with the weight set Homer bought from Rainier Wolfcastle's garage sale and becomes strong enough to face the man who robbed her--and too strong for Homer to handle.
Guest Stars: Tress MacNeille as Mugger's Cheap Girlfriend, Pamela Reed as Ruth Powers, Karl Wiedergott as Various, Pamela Hayden as Milhouse
Director: Pete Michels (1)
Writer: Carolyn Omine
Songs: Composer Charles A. Zimmerman -- Anchors Aweigh, Etta James -- At Last, Pat Benatar -- Love Is A Battlefield, Frankie Goes To Hollywood -- Relax
 
301 :14x10 - Pray Anything (Feb/09/2003)
Homer gets jealous of Flanders and his incredible string of good luck, so he decides to imitate his neighbor by using the power of prayer to get ahead--which leads to Homer suing Reverend Lovejoy for ownership of the church after falling in a ditch.
Guest Stars: Karl Wiedergott as Various, Tress MacNeille as Various, Pamela Hayden as Milhouse, Rod Flanders, Lisa Leslie (1) as Herself, Maggie Roswell as Helen Lovejoy
Director: Michael Polcino
Writer: Neal Boushell, Sam O'Neal
 
302 :14x11 - Barting Over (Feb/16/2003)
Bart learns that he was once a child actor in commercials and all the money earned was squandered by Homer to buy back incriminating photos. In retaliation, Bart petitions the court to have himself legally emancipated from his parents and moves out of the Simpson house.
Guest Stars: Marcia Wallace as Edna Krabappel, Tress MacNeille as Brandine, Dolph, Jimbo, Lindsay Naegle, Russi Taylor as Martin Prince, Karl Wiedergott as Various, Jane Kaczmarek as Judge Harm, Blink 182 as Themselves, Tony Hawk as Himself, Pamela Hayden as Milhouse
Director: Matthew Nastuk
Writer: Andrew Kreisberg
Songs: Blink 182 -- All the Small things
 
303 :14x12 - I'm Spelling As Fast As I Can (Feb/16/2003)
Lisa competes at a spelling bee and becomes the pride of the town. Meanwhile, Homer goes touring with a group who are obsessed with eating Krusty Burger's latest sandwich.
Guest Stars: Tress MacNeille as Jimbo, Pamela Hayden as Milhouse, Karl Wiedergott as Various, Russi Taylor as Martin Prince, George Plimpton as Himself
Director: Nancy Kruse
Writer: Kevin Curran
 
304 :14x13 - A Star is Born Again (Mar/02/2003)
Flanders dates a movie star, but worries that her wild Hollywood style is conflicting with his conservative Christian values.
Guest Stars: Tress MacNeille as Agnes, Cookie Kwan, Karl Wiedergott as Various, Pamela Hayden as Milhouse, Rod Flanders, Marcia Wallace as Edna Krabappel, Helen Fielding as Herself, James L. Brooks (1) as Himself, Marisa Tomei as Sara Sloane, Maggie Roswell as Luann Van Houten
Director: Michael Marcantel
Writer: Brian Kelley (3)
 
305 :14x14 - Mr. Spritz Goes to Washington (Mar/09/2003)
When The Simpsons become fed up with the new flight patterns at the Springfield airport which are sending loud planes over their house all the time, they take a stand by nominating Krusty the Clown as their new Congressman.
Special Guest Stars: Joe Mantegna as Fat Tony, | Guest Stars: Karl Wiedergott as Various, Tress MacNeille as Brandine, Cookie Kwan, | Uncredited: Pamela Hayden as Milhouse
Director: Lance Kramer
Writer: John Swartzwelder
 
306 :14x15 - C. E. D'oh (Mar/16/2003)
To impress Marge, Homer becomes the CEO of Springfield Nuclear Power Plant when he releases a canary that, according to Mr. Burns, is the plant's legal owner.
Guest Stars: Karl Wiedergott as Various, Tress MacNeille as Various, Pamela Hayden as Milhouse
Director: Mike B. Anderson (1)
Writer: Dana Gould
 
307 :14x16 - 'Scuse Me While I Miss the Sky (Mar/30/2003)
Lisa takes up astronomy in order to make something out of her life. However her attempts of getting the lights turned down during the night only result in a rise in the crime rate. Meanwhile, a British man named Declan Desmond films a documentary about the student life at Springfield Elementary.
Special Guest Stars: Eric Idle as Declan Desmond, Joe Mantegna as Fat Tony, Marcia Wallace as Edna Krabappel, | Guest Stars: Pamela Hayden as Milhouse, Russi Taylor as Martin Prince, Karl Wiedergott as Various, Tress MacNeille as Jimbo
Director: Steven Dean Moore (1)
Writer: Allen Glazier, Dan Greaney
 
308 :14x17 - Three Gays of the Condo (Apr/13/2003)
Homer finds an old note from Marge, revealing that Marge never liked Homer and only stayed with him because he got her pregnant. Upset over the news, Homer moves out and lives with a male homosexual couple, who show Homer the wonders of the gay lifestyle.
Special Guest Stars: Ben Schatz as Himself, Scott Thompson (1) as Grady, Weird Al Yankovic as Himself, | Guest Stars: Terry W. Greene (1) as Julio, Karl Wiedergott as Various, Tress MacNeille as Various, Pamela Hayden as Milhouse
Director: Mark Kirkland
Writer: Matt Warburton
 
309 :14x18 - Dude, Where's My Ranch? (Apr/27/2003)
Homer decides to write an original Christmas carol, and pens a tune called “Flanders is a Jerk.” The song becomes such a hit that The Simpsons become sick of the fame and move away to a dude ranch.
Special Guest Stars: Andy Serkis as Cleanie, Jonathan Taylor Thomas as Luke Stetson, David Byrne (1) as Himself, | Guest Stars: Tress MacNeille as Various, Pamela Hayden as Rod Flanders, Karl Wiedergott as Various
Director: Chris Clements (1)
Writer: Ian Maxtone-Graham
 
310 :14x19 - Old Yeller-Belly (May/04/2003)
Santa's Little Helper fails to save Homer from Bart's treehouse fire. As a result, Homer disowns him, but when Santa's Little Helper becomes the newest mascot for Duff Beer (replacing Duffman), The Simpsons want him back--but may be too late when Santa's Little Helper's previous owner from the very first episode ("Simpsons Roasting over an Open Fire") wants his dog back too.
Guest Stars: John Kassir as Various, Stacy Keach (1) as Howard K. Duff VII, Pamela Hayden as Milhouse, | Uncredited: Tress MacNeille as Agnes Skinner
Director: Bob Anderson (1)
Writer: John Frink, Don Payne
 
311 :14x20 - Brake My Wife, Please (May/11/2003)
Homer loses his driver's license after driving into the ocean, and discovers the joys of walking. Meanwhile, Marge is saddled with driving duties and becomes so stressed out, she begins hurting Homer subconsciously.
Guest Stars: Steve Buscemi as Himself, Jane Kaczmarek as Judge Harm, Jackson Browne as Himself, Tress MacNeille as Lindsay Naegle, Pamela Hayden as Milhouse, Marcia Wallace as Edna Krabappel, Karl Wiedergott as Various
Director: Pete Michels (1)
Writer: Tim Long (2)
 
312 :14x21 - The Bart of War (May/18/2003)
After destroying Flanders' Beatles shrine, Bart and Milhouse are punished by being put in community groups that end up fighting each other over territory.
Guest Stars: Karl Wiedergott as Various, Tress MacNeille as Lindsay Naegle, Russi Taylor as Martin Prince, Pamela Hayden as Milhouse, Rod Flanders
Director: Michael Polcino
Writer: Marc Wilmore
 
313 :14x22 - Moe Baby Blues (May/18/2003)
While attempting suicide by jumping off a bridge, Moe inadvertently saves Maggie (after she goes flying out the Simpsons' car window) and becomes attached to her, making Homer jealous.
Special Guest Stars: Joe Mantegna as Fat Tony, | Guest Stars: Tress MacNeille as Various, Karl Wiedergott as Various
Director: Lauren MacMullan
Writer: J. Stewart Burns
 
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