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The Simpsons: The Way We Was

When the TV breaks down, Marge and Homer decide to tell their children a story. After refusing to tell the story of how Bart was born (which would later be seen in season 3's "I Married Marge"), they decide to tell the story of how Homer and Marge met in high school--and how Marge almost went out with a nerd named Artie Ziff.

Episode Info  

Episode number: 2x12
Production Number: 7F12
Airdate: Thursday January 31st, 1991

Special Guest Stars
Jon LovitzJon Lovitz
voiced Artie Ziff, Mr. Seckofsky

Guest Stars
Hank AzariaHank Azaria
voiced Apu, Moe, Chief Wiggum, Carl, Comic Book Guy, Dr. Nick Riviera, Prof. Frink, Cletus, Sea Captain, Kirk Van Houten, Various
Maggie RoswellMaggie Roswell
voiced Maude Flanders, Helen Lovejoy, Miss Hoover, various
Tress MacNeilleTress MacNeille
voiced Agnes Skinner, Dolph, various
Main Cast
Dan CastellanetaDan Castellaneta
voiced Homer Simpson, Abraham Simpson, Krusty the Klown, Barney, Willy, Sideshow Mel, Mayor Quimby, Hans Moleman, Gil, Itchy, Various
Julie KavnerJulie Kavner
voiced Marjorie "Marge" Bouvier Simpson, Patty Bouvier, Selma Bouvier, Jacqueline Ingrid Bouvier, Various
Nancy CartwrightNancy Cartwright
voiced Bart Simpson, Nelson Muntz, Ralph Wiggum, Todd Flanders, Kearney, Various
Yeardley SmithYeardley Smith
voiced Lisa Simpson, Various
Harry ShearerHarry Shearer
voiced Mr. Burns, Smithers, Dr. Marvin Monroe, Ned Flanders, Seymour Skinner, Otto, Kent Brockman, Dr. Hibbert, Lenny, Rev. Lovejoy, Various
Episode Notes
Chalkboard Gag:
I will not get very far with this attitude.

Couch Gag:
Repeat of Bart Gets an F.
The family sits on the couch and it falls through the floor.

This episode introduces the characters

Artie Ziff

Rainier Wolfcastle

(later named "Raphael" in Season 12's "Day of the Jackanapes")

Principal Dondelinger

Clancy Bouvier

ArtistSong TitlePlayed When
Al GreenHow Do You Mend A Broken Heart? 
Barry WhiteCan't Get Enough 
The CarpentersClose To You 
ChicagoColor My World 
Elton JohnGoodbye Yellow Brick Road 
Ray StevensThe Streak 
Steve Miller BandThe Joker 
Van McCoyDo The Hustle 

Episode Quotes
(At debate team practice, Homer and Artie Ziff hold a debate.)
Artie: Our current speed limit is an anachronism. The fatuity--
Homer: (Reading from a dictionary.) "Ignoramus."
Artie: --Will you shut up?
Homer: Wait a minute. That word you keep calling me?
Artie: Ignoramus?
Homer: Ignoramus! It means I'm stupid, doesn't it?
Artie: There is a difference between ignorance and stupidity.
Homer: Not to me, there isn't, you--
Mrs. Bloominstein: Homer?
Homer: --ignoramus!
Artie: You're the ignoramus.
Homer: No, you are!
Mrs. Bloominstein: Homer, would you like to present your rebuttal?
Homer: With pleasure. (Everyone gasps as Homer moons the class.)

Grampa: What's the matter, boy?
Homer: Nothing.
Grampa: You haven't said boo all night and usually I have to wrestle the bucket out of your greasy mitts.
Homer: Dad, I'm in love.
Grandpa: Uh-oh. Why don't you grab yourself a beer, boy.
Homer: But, Dad, I don't drink.
Grandpa: Cut the crap! (Imitating Homer) I just collect the cans, Daddy! (Normal) Now, grab yourself a beer and get me one, too.

Teacher: Simpson! Be quiet!
Homer: I haven't seen you in school before...
Teacher: Okay Simpson! You just brought yourself another day of detention!
Homer: Maybe we should get together some time
Teacher: Two days!
Marge: I'm sorry, I don't even know your name!
Homer: I'm Homer
Teacher: Three days!
Homer: Jay
Teacher: Four days!
Homer: Simpson
Teacher: Five days!
Homer: It was worth it!
Teacher: Six days... Okay Simpson, to the back of the room!

Marge: When I got home I realized who I should have gone to the prom with.
Homer: Who? (Realizing) Oh.
Marge: My prom date.
Homer: Marge, pour vous.
Marge: Why so glum?
Homer: I've got a problem. As soon as you stop this car, I'm gonna hug you, and kiss you, and then I'll never be able to let you go! (Fade back to the present) And I never have...

Episode Goofs
When Principal Dondelinger opens the bathroom door BOYS is seen but in the closeup, the word BOYS has vanished.

While Homer is waiting for Marge, Patty & Selma are briefly transparent. The back of the couch can be seen through them.

When Patty & Selma open the door, Homer's tux is light blue but when he enters the house, it's suddenly purple for a moment.

Selma's pants are green when she answers the door w/ Patty but turn blue momentarily when sitting in the living room waiting for Marge.

When seen from the back, Selma's sleeveless top is momentarily green instead of blue as it is in the rest of the scene.

Cultural References
The Way We Were

The title is a parody of the classic film, The Way We Were.

Happy Days

The teen makeout area Marge and Artie go to is called "Inspiration Point," which is taken straight out of Happy Days.

The movie review show the Simpsons watch is an allusion to At the Movies (originally titled Siskel & Ebert & the Movies) that starred movie reviewers Gene Siskel (1946–1999) & Roger Ebert (1942–2013).

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