Chalkboard: I will not call the principal "spud head"

Couch:
TV Version: Repeat of the couch gag from "Homer Defined" where an alien escapes through a trap door before the Simpsons can sit on the couch.
DVD Version: Repeat of the circus/showbiz extravaganza couch gag from "Lisa's First Word"

Mediocre Presidents Song

Kids: We are the mediocre presidents.
You won't find our faces on dollars or on cents!
There's Taylor, there's Tyler, there's Fillmore and there's Hayes.
There's William Henry Harrison,
Harrison: I died in thirty days!
Kids: We... are... the... adequate, forgettable, occasionally regrettable, caretaker presidents of the U-S-A!

Ralph: My parents won't let me use scissors.
Miss Hoover: The children have a right to laugh at you, Ralph. These things couldn't cut butter. Now, take out your red crayons.
Ralph: Miss Hoover. I don't have a red crayon.
Miss Hoover: Why not?
Ralph: I ate it.