Chalkboard: None

Couch: The family runs in and finds an obese man taking up the entire couch; the man tries to give the Simpsons room to sit, but it's a tight fit.

(The Simpsons are watching TV)
Chief: You busted up that crack house pretty bad, McGonigle. Did you really have to break so much furniture?
McGonigle: You tell me, Chief. You had a pretty good view from behind your desk.
Homer: Ah, McGonigle: eases the pain.
Chief: You're off the case, McGonigle!
McGonigle: You're off your case, Chief!
Chief: What does that mean exactly?
Homer: (yelling) It means he gets results, you stupid chief!
Lisa: Dad, sit down.
Homer: Oh, I'm sorry.

Brad Goodman: Let's look at the rainbow. What's in there? Depression, insomnia, motor-mouth, darting eyes,indecisiveness, decisiveness, bossiness, uncontrollable falling down, geriatric profanity disorder or GPD, and chronic nagging...nagging...nagging... nagging...nagging.
Patty: (Punches TV) Sorry, it does that sometimes.

Marge: Homer, did you eat my whole pan of brownies?
Bart: Uh oh. You're in for it now, Dad.
Homer: Marge, I'm feeling a lot of shame right now.
Marge: I'm hearing that you feel a lot of shame.
Homer: And I feel that you hear my shame.
Marge: I'm feeling annoyance and frustration, but also tolerance.
Homer: I feel validated by that.
Marge: Good! I'm glad we had this talk.
Homer: Me too.

Edna: The wireless was an invention by Guglielmo Marconi. Who can tell me what his first message was?
Bart: Uh…
Milhouse: I want-a change-a my name!
(Everyone laughs)
Edna: (chuckling) Oh, good one, Milhouse. Anyone else? The first message by wireless?
Bart: It was…
Martin: Our tenth caller will receive tickets to Supertramp!
(everyone laughs)