Chalkboard: Hillbillies are people too

Couch: Repeat of the couch gag from "Lisa Gets a 'A'" where hair dryers switch The Simpsons' hairstyles and Maggie falls off the couch after receiving Marge's large, blue bouffant.

Marge: Then the bird sang "I Love the Night Life" with clever new lyrics.
Homer: I hate that song.
Marge: I do too, but it was sweet. Women really like that sort of thing, Homey.
Homer: Don't worry, honey. I've got something really special planned for Valentine's Day.
Marge: It's not that monkey card I found in the car, is it?
Homer: Wouldn't you like to know. (rolls over and looks worried) Ooh.

Homer: This Valentine's crap has gone too far!
Male Crowd: Yeah
Skinner: Eh, Edna won't even let me clap her erasers.
Sideshow Mel: My Barbara will no longer pleasure me with the French arts!
Moe: The gal I'm stalking had me bumped back to two hundred feet.
Barney: Aw, Moe. That's too far.

Homer: And then the handsome prince realized he had to go to the bathroom really bad, but the evil ogre …Barney… had left the men's room in the most wicked condition! So the prince went out back to the enchanted alley…
Lisa: That's not a fairy tale; it's something that happened to you at Moe's!
Homer: Sssh. Anyway, the prince passed out for a hundred years, until he was awakened by the kiss of a noble raccoon!

Marge: (reading newspaper) My darling bride Manjula,
I hereby mend my ways.
I'll shower you with Valentines,
For seven love-filled days.
Lisa: Oh, how romantic!
Homer: I used to take out ads like that when we were newlyweds.
Marge: The only ad you took out was to sell our lawnmower!
Homer: We sold it, didn't we?